


Pretty Bird

by Chony



Category: BnHA, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Angst, Bakusquad (My Hero Academia), Boss/Employee Relationship, Characters Are Pro Heroes (My Hero Academia), Drama & Romance, F/M, Flirting Bakugo, Flying, Harassment, Hero Sidekick Relationship, Intrigue, Jealousy, Obsessive Behavior, Pro Hero Reader (My Hero Academia), Protective Kirishima Eijirou, Revenge, Slow Burn, Tsundere Bakugou Katsuki, Violence, Yandere, Yandere Takami Keigo | Hawks, pro hero, reader has wings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-25
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:41:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 37
Words: 72,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23314807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chony/pseuds/Chony
Summary: In Hawks twisted mind it must have been love to someone else that drove you away from his side.After all he has looked out for you for years and your career as a pro hero was kick-started by him. Not realizing it was his increasingly possessive behavior that made you see no other solution than to find a new agency, he is decided to punish this disloyalty unless you come crawling back. In a struggle for independence and freedom you face off against japans most popular hero, who is not above using threats, blackmail and intrigue to win back what he perceives as his right or end your career as a hero.Only few dare to stand up with you, first of all  your loyal friend Kirishima. To your surprise his best friend, another temperamental blonde seems to have taken an interest in your story as well.
Relationships: Bakugou Katsuki/Reader, Takami Keigo | Hawks/Reader
Comments: 151
Kudos: 725





	1. Chapter 1

The first two weeks at your new agency were hard. They had you working mostly gathering intel, following persons of interest as a silent shadow at night…

It was a funny thing about people, they always turned around, watched every corner…but nobody ever thought to look _up_. Dark wings carried you almost silently through the night sky...There was no question why you had been handpicked by Hawks as a teen to follow in his footsteps. Annoyed with yourself you shook your head, as if to shake off the thought of him. That was past now. Even your old colourful costume from your time as Hawks sidekick was replaced with a dark cat suit more suited for these occasions. It was tight enough to make you blush the first time you wore it in front of others. You were not really comfortable showing your body off like that yet but the designer had insisted it was made for speed and agility and could only help your rebranding. And oh boy would you need that rebranding. Hawks had held his mouth shut for now, waiting out the month he had given you to come crawling back to him…but already certain magazines started speculating why you were not seen together anymore and a personal feud with the most popular hero would certainly send your ratings crashing down the moment it got out.

Tonight you were following a low rank mobster in the hopes that he would lead you to his boss’s hideout. The leader of an underground organization that, if your sources were reliable, was planning on making a grab for power. And if those news had made it to the heroes, the other underworld bosses certainly knew what was coming. In other words, there would be a gang war, the question was only when and where.

Watching the nervous young man pass a number of parked cars with tinted windows to enter a large mansion you got a little restless. There was no way of telling if he was meeting the target in there. You circled the building once, then again… From all you saw right now you had no valuable information to report back to the agency but you had a hunch, if you could just _see_ what was going on…The inner court was the only option, it might set off some alarms but you would be careful. And where no risk…

Soundlessly you lowered yourself into the traditional garden in the inner yard. From inside the house you can hear noises- loud noises, unusually loud for this time of night – you realized it was a fight going on. The other gang must have already been inside when you arrived. You remembered the cars, six at least…damn. There was no time to call for backup, the noises were moving closer. With a strong kick you sent down the sliding paper door that led inside.

“Stop and drop your weapons, I am here to-“ but you did not get to finishing that sentence before a bullet shot past you. Instinctively you sped out of the way to hide around a corner. More shots were fired in your direction and then you heard a strange female voice singing. The shooting almost immediately stopped and you felt your lids grow heavy, the woman’s voice suddenly feeling familiar and soothing – damn, a lullaby quirk. You tried to cover your ears and that helped a little as you continued fighting to stay awake but a battle or an escape would be impossible this way. A shadow fell on you and you were now dragged out of the building. Your limbs feel too heavy to resist much, though you could hear more shots fired, lazily you wondered if they had found earplugs or why they did not hear the beautiful voice. Someone tried to force you to your feet but you were tired, so tired...Sudden stinging pain on your cheek pulled you back to reality. Light breaking on blonde hair, a man stood in front of you, his hand still raised from the slap, ears covered by a big set of headphones.

A furious voice asking what in the world you think you were doing entering without backup. Your first thought is that it must be Bakugo but in the dark you could smell the familiar, masculine scents of suede and hints of agarwood under his favourite cologne.

“Sensei” the title came over your lips without thinking and you wished at once you had swallowed your tongue instead.

Both of you spread your wings as if synchronized and took off as you heard footsteps closing in. With one hand Hawks dragged you behind him, speeding you up while you flapped desperately in trying to keep up with his giant red wings. When you both slowed down he gave you a sharp look.

“How comes you dress like a dominatrix nowadays? Or did the lack of offers sway you to be hired by midnight or in an _entirely_ different field of work?” The soft dark suit clang to your skin but protected you comfortably against the breeze. Despite his disapproving tone you saw his golden gaze linger on your curves. Way charming to imply you look like a prostitute and then gawk like that.

“How comes you have the time to follow former sidekicks around? No more work for the number two hero or are you really _that_ obsessed?” you counter coolly. No reason to let that jerk get to you.

“Hey if this whole thing was about you exploring your sexuality you didn’t need to leave, I’m nothing if not open minded.” He gave you a wink. That bastard was just trying to get a rise out of you.

“Thanks for the offer, I’d rather die. Anyway, nice of you to save my ass back there, I underestimated the situation. Good job, I’ll be fine from here on.”

You saw his brow quirk, for just a moment. You knew how much he hated it when someone talked to him like that. The way you praised him like a rookie on his first day had more than a hint of personal revenge but after all you were still furious with him, your last few meetings had left you hoping not to see him for at least a few years.

“Who do you work for?” Hawks demanded to know. The playful tone was gone, he had passed you, now flying a bit before and above you, as he had always liked to. Like an eagle watching its prey…well, or a hawk.

“Well wouldn’t you like to know?” there was no reason to tell him, he would find out fast enough and begin to try to ruin your new life.

“Don’t play with me.” His voice was angry, jealous, you remembered how convinced he had been that you must be dating your new employer- of course he did not know that you had been forced to change plans after his intimidation scheme and were glad to have gotten _any_ offer.

“Just fly home, Hawks. I owe you no more explanations, if anything _you_ owe me an apology for your behavior last time we met and except for that we are very much done with each other.”

Suddenly a weight crashed into you from above, sending you into an uncontrollable downwards spiral, panicking and desperately trying to catch yourself in the air but your wings were held together, you fell out of the sky, struggling in a in a fight for your life to free your wings, the ground closing in by the second, you would smash into a rooftop –

Just meters before the impact you were stopped. Slowly he let you down onto the roof. You collapsed onto the concrete, your heart beating in panic, pure adrenaline pumping through your veins. From above feathers were raining down, bottle green, aubergine, midnight blue, black and iridescent like an oil spill. Feathers you had lost in your fight for survival. Under laboured breaths you managed to bring out “You almost killed me!”

“Who would have thought?”

“Are you insane?! You could have killed me!” You crawled onto your knees, trying not to be sick after this near death experience. He had held your wings tight together and led both of you into a free fall towards the earth, just to spread his wings and catch you both a mere moment before the impact. You would not have guessed that he even had the strength to hold your wings, they were certainly the strongest muscles in your body. Hawks picked up one of your feathers, dark as the night.

“If I wanted you to die all I had to do was not step in and save you from those mobsters before. No. This was a reminder.”

“That you are insane?!”

“That **_I_** created you! That all you are, all you have, was given to you by me. I taught you to fly like this, I got you into U.A., I made you a hero. Don’t think I can’t take it all away again.” His words hung heavy in the night air. Still some of your feathers were falling from the sky, those you lost first were last to meet the ground. Hawks on the other hand looked untouched by all that, almost bored as if these last minutes had been nothing unusual to him. With a smooth gesture he brushed his blonde curls out of his face. His demeanour could not be less fitting with his words. Maybe that was why he was so popular, the public only ever got to see that side of his.

“You are threatening me? Because I left your agency?”

“Call it a threat, I call it a promise.”


	2. Chapter 2

_Three Weeks earlier_

When you landed in front of the bar where you had agreed to meet up you could have sworn you heard a rustling above you in the dark sky but glancing up the streetlights made anything beyond their bright sheen unrecognizable. Inside Kirishima had already spotted you, waving frantically at you through the window but you took a moment to fix your appearance after the flight. The stuffy warm air of the bar welcomed you in and the stress of the day fell off your shoulders for a moment. Now you could see that Kirishima had not come alone. Next to him on a shaky stool sat a pretty pink girl in a surprisingly stylish outfit despite combining two different seventies patterns, the hero Alien queen. Mina Ashido if you remembered her name right and next to her, just getting knocked off his seat for his attempt to casually put his arm around her the electric Kaminari Denki. The Tape hero Sero Hanta was missing, sadly, he was by far your favourite between Eijiros friends. In his stead there was someone you would never have expected to meet afterhours in a bar. Katsuki Bakugo sat leaned back in the only armchair, having secured himself the best spot. Of course he had. Truth to be told could not stand the explosive hero, though he had always been one of the prodigy students but his temper had taught you early to stay away when he was around. You gave Kirishima an accusing look that he obviously did not understand as he explained happily “I thought I would reunite the gang! Sero was busy tonight, but we got you instead, that’s not bad either.” Soon they had organized you a seat and a beer, though after the day you had you would have liked something a little stronger. Nervously you played with the seam of your jacket. After a moment they took up their conversation about the current young wave of heroes competing in the U.A. sports festival again, Mina was excitedly telling about a younger cousin who was competing as a first year. You took in the atmosphere of the place…not a bad choice, Eijiro had a hand for finding cosy spots. The indie rock in the background relaxed you a bit, as you took a look at the card. Maybe a red wine…

“And it’s just so important to make an impression because those internships are a vital starting point in your career…”

Kirishima thoughtfully nodded, it was a much discussed question and especially now that they were all fighting to establish themselves as pro heroes the question of “I don’t know, I am pretty sure as long as you grow into an impressive hero your connections don’t matter too much.”

“Of course you think that, with your idealism but you have to look at reality, the only one between us here who gets any real recognition, not to mention a proper salary is _her_ and you can’t tell me that’s got nothing to do with _connections_.” Mina gave you a pointed look. Slightly shocked you looked up from the card…she could not possibly have meant that the way it sounded to you right now.

“That’s not fair, Mina. She works just as hard as the rest of us, we should be happy for each other when one of us gets some recognition.”

“I am just saying that if you graduate that year and get a job as the sidekick of one of the top heroes right away, that might have more to do with-“

“Who wants another round?” You interrupted her mid-sentence, not even waiting for an answer before you got up and fled the conversation in the approximate direction of the bar. You had not the slightest wish to listen to the rest of that conversation… It was not the first time you heard things like that. Hawks had always told you it was just jealousy, people who did not want to see your skill through their envy. But it did not feel like that, Mina had never seemed like a jealous type, just a little blunt in her openness, she did not even seem to have wanted to offend you. Just as if she was stating what everyone could see… Nonsense. You had earned your spot, impressing the pros even during your internship. And talk like that just meant Mina did not want to see that. She hardly knew you anyway. Finally you went to the bar. The barkeepers immediate attention made you smile. ‘You still got it, girl’ the thought was comforting, even after a day like today. Pushing your chest out a little you ordered a round for the table, hoping they would have moved on to a new subject once you returned. Just to make sure you took a moment to check your phone. Three new messages from Hawks. Without reading them you swiped the little icon away with a motion of your thumb. Not tonight. Maybe it was time to block him.

When the barkeeper brought the drinks to the table you decided to return too. Kaminari was trying to talk the others into a drinking game. Good, you thought, sitting down again and joining his pleas, a nice little buzz might get Hawks out of your mind for tonight.

“Come ooon, Eijiro, pleeeease? We never do anything crazy anymore since you graduated!” You tried to make big cartoonish puppy eyes. Kirishima laughed at your weird grimace and Denkis even more ridiculous imitation of it.

“Yes, **Eijiro** ” Kaminari jokingly imitated the way you so intimately used Kirishimas first name. “Just one round, yeah?”

“Not tonight kids, I got patrol tomorrow. I shouldn’t overdo it tonight.”

“Boooooring!” you called, drowing out Kirishimas pretend annoyed groan.

“You’re getting old, Kirishima. Come on man you’re letting us down, grandpa!”

“Sorry, guess I’m a responsible adult now. But please you two, nobody keeps you from getting completely hammered by yourselves, I am sure it will be a joy to watch.”

You heard Mina giggle, “Pfff, responsible” hearing her join in your mocking was a good feeling, you liked the pink girl and her confident, cheerful personality.

“Well I know you guys have a lot more to drown than I do, Denki, you failure of a womanizer, I am surprised you made it through the evening without at least two rejections-“

Mina called out an amused “Buuuurn!” underlining that absolute roast while you giggled into your drink. Kaminari laughed it off, though a bit of an idiot he was a good sport and could take a joke.

“- And with you missy I am surprised you didn’t ask me to cover your tab yet, aren’t you newly unemployed?” Damn, Kirishima really didn’t pull his punches. But his warm smile reminded you that roasts between friends were all in good fun. With his patented mixture of humour and sincerity there was no knowing what he would say next.

“So you lost your job? Damn, I’m so sorry!” Minas pitiful look almost hurt more than Bakugos entertained “Hah!”

Way to put it, Eijiro.

“Damn, how bad did you mess up for Hawks to kick you out after all the time he put into you? Did you drop a civilian? Burn down his base?” Kaminaris jest strangely was the least hurtful of their responses. He just didn’t take anything too serious.

“Not really. I wanted to work for a different agency for a while, try out something different… So I went to talk to Hawks. But things got pretty ugly, so it will be a bit more of a permanent change.” You tried sounding neutral but from the expressions around the table you could tell that they understood how bad of a hit it truly was. You had always been seen as Hawks future sidekick and possible successor. There were no other students who had gotten regular on campus visits by a pro to check in on their progress that you knew about. The relationship between you and your Sensei had always been something special, it had elevated you above most other young heroes as he openly supported you. The popular young Hawks in your corner had certainly been something that had brought you admiration as well as envy from others, maybe for many to secretly enjoy your downfall. But Mina’s reaction had been pretty sincere and Kaminari and Kirishima did their best in their own way to cheer you up, mocking and joking with you like usual.

“That is…unexpected.” Mina finally said. “What are you gonna do now? I mean you have to make up, it’s just where you belong, isn’t it?”

“I don’t want to. I think it would be good for me to find a different agency, learn some new skills, expand my knowledge, you know?” The casual tone you had struck masked the discomfort in your voice.

“Why tho?” Denki threw in, more serious now. “It’s a good agency, Hawks will be number one in a few years, everyone knows that. And being his number two sounds like a pretty sweet spot. You two are one of the most popular hero couples, it already got you a bunch of fans and there is no other agency that would cater to your quirk on a comparative level.”

“We are no couple!” the words had left your mouth before you could even think of it. You blushed lightly, not having expected to have to explain something like that tonight. It was ridiculous that this little detail was really what you focused on right now, nonsense like that did not matter. And yet you suddenly wished Kirishima would have come alone and you would have been able to talk about the whole thing… Embarrassed you blinked away the rising tears. “I will get myself a drink, be right back.” You turned away from the table, hearing a ruckus break out as Eijiro hit Kaminari on the head and called him a thoughtless idiot.

When you returned to the table Mina and Kaminari excused themselves to move on to another bar, kindly giving you an opportunity to talk alone with Kirishima. You smiled gratefully at Mina, knowing this empathetic offer had certainly been her idea. She might be a bit more direct than you could handle sometimes but she did care and there was a deep kindness underneath the confident exterior. They left shortly after, waving over to your table a last time.

For a while you waited, hoping Bakugo would take a hint and do the same as the others but instead of leaving he ordered a large beer, leaning back into his armchair.

“Hard day, huh?” Eijiros voice was warm and comforting. Wordless you leaned in and let the red hero give you a long hug. “Thank you…” you said as he let you go. You meant it. Your old friend gave you an inviting look, the kind that told you he knew something was up and he would wait until you were ready to tell. And suddenly the words poured out of you, the whole awful story, how everything had moved over your head, how Hawks had shouted at you. When you got to the part where he had slapped you Kirishima angrily hit the table, growling “That bastard!” and it strangely helped. After you finished your friend was furious, swearing to rip the wings off Hawks if he got him in his fingers, but you tried to calm him. You didn’t want the story to become public and it would not help you to escape Hawks shadow if it did. All you wanted was to move on, you explained. But his fury on your behalf was strangely comforting. He became quieter, for what it was worth but you knew he was seething inside. Kirishima valued fairness and chivalry more than any other hero you had met so far and he was not one to overlook dishonourable behaviour, especially in a pro. You could hear him mutter something that sounded a lot like “despicable scum” and “villainous, disgusting behaviour” and your heart grew a little warmer. Now you realized how scared you had been to be dismissed about this.

“You must be an absolute idiot to not have seen this coming” the sentence hit you like a gut punch. Bakugos arrogant visage was hidden in the shadows but you did not need to see him to know what kind of cruel grin he would have.

“An older hero taking you under his wing like that, not for your skill but for his interest in you. It was obvious from the start. And I don’t get why you complain, didn’t you get all you wanted? Maybe Hawks was not your type, I guess, but you’re such a pretty thing, I’m sure you can find another top hero to be your sugar daddy.” 

This was too much. With a shaking hand you took your drink and emptied it over his head. Angrily you rose before either of the guys could react, colourful feathers dancing in the air behind you as you stormed out of the bar. You did not need to take that bastard’s bullshit and certainly not today of all days. It felt bad to have left Kirishima without a goodbye but if he brought friends like that to pick on you he kind of deserved it, a little, you told yourself.


	3. Chapter 3

When you woke up with a hurting, heavy head it was almost noon. Cursing you stumbled into the kitchen to get a glass of orange juice just to realize that the fridge was completely empty, except for a bottle of soy sauce and some leftover takeout from last week. Of course, lately you had stayed in your little flat above Hawks agency… for a moment you longingly thought back at the fridge that was always mysteriously filled with delicacies for you and the king sized bed where you could almost comfortably stretch your wings… Or the floor heating, you thought, hurrying to get out of the kitchen to fetch some socks. Well, it was time to become self-sufficient.

After plucking a few lost feathers out of your hair and taking a shower you decided to visit a street market to tackle the empty fridge problem and buy some other necessities that you had neglected in the past months.

The trip to the market had lifted your mood. Having stopped for breakfast at a street vendor and carrying more bags than you could handle you returned home. You had even gotten yourself a plant to have a little company in this rather empty apartment. After all, you had only really lived here for maybe the first two weeks after graduating from U.A. before you decided to make the much more luxurious suite in the agency your permanent home. The plant, a tiny bonsai, ended up on the window pane, you hoped he would like it there. Now the next problem was the cooking…you had never had to cook for yourself and daily takeout was not the kind of healthy diet one could build a hero career on…but you would figure this out. With a sheepish smile you wrote Kirishima a short message, “dinner tonight? My place? Bought fresh ingredients, can’t cook, save me!”. That should do the trick. A few minutes later you received a thumbs up as an answer. Perfect. Now on to the – your thoughts were interrupted as you noticed the voicemail icon. Strange, you never got those. But not as strange as the message you found. It was your new agency, informing you that there has been a problem and that in the current situation they could not possibly take on a new sidekick, but that they wished you much luck with your further career. You cursed under your breath, feeling a heavy knot of fear in your stomach… Calm down, you thought, this is nothing, just a little bureaucratic hiccup. No problem, you knew a whole bunch of heroes and many of them had opened their own agencies.

“I am so sorry, but I don’t think you would fit well with our agency.”

“Could I please talk to Suneater himself? We know each other well and I know he was always interested in working together-“

“Sorry but that is currently impossible. This is a definite answer, good luck with your further search.”

You could not believe it. You were about to call Tamaki privately but it would be too humiliating to hear the same answer in person. This had been the fifth agency that had rejected you, politely and under apologies but without even letting you say much. It took calling Neijire to find out the answer for why nobody wanted to work with you.

“I am sorry dear, but I can’t take you. You are blacklisted and as the leader of a young agency I cannot take that risk. If I get excluded from important meetings and don’t get involved in relevant cases because I stepped on Hawks toes I can close my agency. And I got people I am responsible for. Give me a call when you worked out things with him, we would love to have you but the price of taking you on right now is something I just cannot afford.” You thanked her for her honesty, saying you understood and would keep her updated. Neijire obviously felt bad, inviting you to meet up soon to talk about the whole thing, saying she would still be there if you needed anything, a recommendation or a friend to talk to, she just could not work with you.

When you hung up you felt fear pulling down like a painful knot in your belly. You called other agencies that would fit your quirk and working style. After eleven more, friendly, endlessly apologetic rejections you gave up. Falling back on your bed you laid, thinking.

Hawks seemed decided not to let you find work as a hero if it was not for him. There was no way around it. You had to speak to him.

Hawks secretary sent you up to him immediately. The sound of your own solitary steps sounding through the empty corridor on the way up made you shudder. A strange, unspecific fear tightened your chest. The door loomed at the end of the corridor and worried not to be able to knock at all if you took the time to think this over you just opened it. When you entered his office you realized Hawks had been in a meeting. Hawks, Bakugo and Shoto Todoroki looked up surprised as you barged in on them.

With a neutral tone Hawks asked the heroes respectfully to continue their conversation at a later time. After some curious looks they said their goodbyes and left the office. When the door fell closed behind them you felt the weight of your Sensei’s golden eyes on you.

“So you are back.”

“To talk.”

“Sure, to talk. Then begin.”

Twenty minutes later you left the building, still deep in thoughts but someone calling out for you pulled you back into reality.

“Hey there birdie!” for a moment you thought it was Teigo but soon you saw him better. The loose fitting tank top and faded jeans might well have been out of Hawks closet but this guy was taller, with ashen hair and deep red eyes. Oh No.

“What in the world would _you_ want from me?”

He ignored your comment entirely, instead answering with a question himself. “So you went back, yeah? Not letting a little lovers quarrel get in the way of making career, huh? I always knew you were a ruthless bitch.”

“Actually I told him that he won, I will stop working as a pro hero. So he can stop threatening my friends’ agencies if they take me on and he won’t have to see me again, I am leaving the city and finding a normal job.” What harm was there in telling Bakugo, he could hardly say anything worse than the magazines would when Hawks much speculated about relationship with his sidekick broke off and she withdrew entirely from public life.

“So…you are giving up just like that?”

“Not much sense in dragging someone else down with me. I can’t expect my friends to face Hawks anger for me and he seems dead set on kicking me out of the business.”

“And you rather give up than work for him.”

“Don’t know how that is any of _your_ business, Bakugo.” His interest in your misery annoyed you. “If you wanna go on and tell me how I’m not good enough to be a pro anyway now would be a great time, I already got over a dozen rejections today and the only good thing about not being a hero anymore is never having to deal with smug assholes like you ever again!”

“I never said you were too bad to be a pro.”

“What?” irritated you got ready to leave.

“I never said you were too bad. I just said Hawks did not choose you for your skill. And it always looked to me like you picked the easy way, rather being an accessory at Hawks side than having to prove yourself like the rest of us. You might be made of the right stuff, but nobody knows until you prove it. But instead you run away when it gets hard, I probably should have expected that of you.” Was that guy _trying_ to piss you off?!

“Listen, fuckface, I practically _begged_ any hero I know with an agency that might need my quirk to hire me. If even my friends are not willing to take me, how am I supposed to find anyone who would, huh?!”

“I don’t remember you begging me.”

“No, maybe because I _wish_ I didn’t know you!” It might be childish to let out your anger on Bakugo but if anyone deserved a piece of your mind it was probably this guy.

“Fine, if you rather let _him_ win than work for me, suit yourself, I always knew you were a quitter. Go home and cry to Kirishima about how unfair the world is, isn't that how you deal with problems?!”

“Work for you? What are you even talking about?”

“Pretty obvious, isn’t it?”

“Would you…take me on, even if I’m blacklisted?” you could not believe what he implied there.

“Do you think I am scared of Hawks? Though I usually make a point not hiring anyone who calls me fuckface during the job interview.”

“Pretty hard to believe you managed to hire anyone then.” You shot right back, laughing when you saw him blush angrily as he realised what you meant. “No no” you continued quickly “I would love to work with you.”

“ _For me_. And I thought there would be begging involved?” he raised his voice and quirked an eyebrow, giving you a mock impression of confused waiting.

You made a grimace at him. Side by side you walked under the overreaching branches of trees that had been planted on both sides of the avenue. The sun shone down and birds all around were making a ruckus, competing to catch attention. Springtime had begun without you noticing it but now, with the buds and first shy blossoms sprouting from the branches above, you felt it all too clear. A new beginning.

“Working for me won’t be like working for Hawks” Bakugo warned, interrupting your peaceful thoughts. “You are not unskilled but your main sidekick position was unearned. You still have a lot to learn and in many areas your skills are rather underdeveloped for a hero of your rank. You got a lot of unearned publicity and Hawks kept you out of actual fights –“

“I know. That’s why I wanted to switch agencies, that’s how this whole mess started.”

He nodded. “Good.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter takes place right after chapter 1 in the timeline, in between there were just two chapters leading up to the current situation. Now we are back at the day Hawks attacked the female protagonist.

_Back in the present_

Bakugo was not entertained by the fact that you managed to get noticed on a simple surveillance mission. He shouted at you for a bit but then luckily got interrupted by a blunter his researchers had made. You snuck out while he was barking at nobody in particular about how he could be surrounded by such incompetence. You had gotten used to his temper quickly, it was like that saying: dogs that bark… When he was grumpily complaining about his team usually all was good. If things got serious he would turn very, very quiet, focusing on controlling the damage. That was when people lost their job afterwards. Usually you would have had a quip to respond to his anger, but the meeting with Hawks still haunted you.

You withdrew into one of the many changing rooms at the agency. In the mirror you saw an exhausted young woman, a dark hero with dark heavy wings. Broken feathers stood out of your usually so well cared for plumage, the shock and fear were still written in your face. Carefully you peeled the suit off your body. A knock on the door.

“I’m about to shower!” You did not feel like being bothered now.

“Just a moment.” Bakugos voice, he sounded much calmer. Well, it might be important. You wrapped yourself into a large bathing towel and opened the door.

“You didn’t tell me everything that happened, did you?” Bakugo looked up and down your body, briefly, as if out of habit but betrayed no reaction.

“It’s fine, nothing big, i…”

“You’re shivering. And your wings look half destroyed”

“Well thanks.” Sarcasm was your last line of defence. Tears rose in your eyes.

“What happened?”

“Hawks” you tried to hold it back, biting your stupid shivering lip. He gave you an unreadable look.

“Go take your shower, if you want I can take a look at your wings afterwards.”

The confrontation with Hawks left you feeling violated, hurt and vulnerable. So you decided to skip the Bakugo meeting and take care of your injuries yourself, at home. You just did not feel like recounting your experience when the shock was still sitting in your bones, especially not to Bakugo, who would probably just shout at you again for going in without backup…But you did need to hear a friendly voice today.

“This cannot seriously be why you called me.” Ibaras voice still had her usual tone but you could her a hint of annoyance.

“Come on, you got the hair and I thought…”

“That I am a gardener? Would you have called Kamui woods too?”

“I just really don’t know what to do, come on… Also I don’t have Kamuis number. Aren’t you happy to hear from me?”

You heard a little sigh, but she did sound a bit more entertained. Ibara always had her tough ‘no-nonsense’ attitude but behind all that she was a normal, kind young woman and loved to be involved. “Fine. You said it’s a south window that might be too much direct sun. And if that doesn’t work you could try fertilizer, though usually they are well fertilized when they come out of the shop. Bonsais can be pretty picky, not a great choice for a first plant…but couldn’t you just google this instead?”

“You are the best! I’ll try that. And who needs google if they have friends with plant hair?”

“Friends who are busy heroes. Speaking of work, I heard you have trouble with Hawks?” Of course she had heard…Despite her uninterested façade Ibara loved gossip, though she would never admit that.

“Oh...yeah I quit. But I try to keep it down a bit, I really don’t need all his fans hating on me…”

“I would worry less about his fans and more about Hawks himself…”

“Oh god, don’t tell me he got to you too!”

“Well he didn’t talk to me directly, it came as part of a very friendly invitation to a hero conference and was pretty sneakily put… but my boss certainly got the message.”

“I still can’t believe he would do that! Oh damn, that’s the doorbell! Call you soon, love and thanks for the advice!” You hurried to get up from the couch and do a little last minute tidying, hiding your drink.

“Next time don’t call me about your plant-“

“Couldn’t hear that, byeeee!” You hung up and giggled. Maybe you should invite her over one day but right now you had a guest coming, for your regular cooking meetup. You opened the door to a wide grinning Kirishima.

“Aww you made it, I would be lost without – Oh-“behind your friend in the dimly lit corridor of your apartment building stood Bakugo, hands in his pockets and grimly starring into your apartment as if he expected a villain to jump out at him.

“Met him on the way, he asked me to go for a drink together and maybe a bite to eat so I thought I would bring him!”

“Oh” You said again, stupidly. You eyed Bakugo again, wondering why in the world he had agreed to come. Kirishima took you by the shoulders and carefully moved you out of the way before he began taking off his shoes to enter.

“As I know you, you already started on the drinks and I thought since you don’t cook anyway we’ll somehow fit in the tiny kitchen.” The redhead went on, not acknowledging the awkward situation at all. 

“Hey, I didn’t-“

“And _there_ is the Gin glass.” Kirishima laughed, pointing on the glass you had quickly put up on a shelf when you heard the doorbell, hoping it would be out of sight. An uncomfortable heat flushed your cheeks, making you avoid your guest’s eyes.

“I thought you would come alone.” You defended yourself. Bakugo, who had stayed silent until now had entered and was taking a look around in your kitchen. He seemed uncomfortable, guarded with his harsh demeanour that you had seen so often when he felt he had to prove himself, one hand still in his pocket as he opened and closed your cabinets and checked your fridge. You plucked your drink from the shelf and finished it, needing some liquid courage to get through this evening. Working together was one thing, at work you could both function, he would bark commands or instructions and you would report your results later and that was it and when things got too serious you both resolved to mockery and insults – not the most typical dynamic but it worked. But meeting in a friendly context in your _home_ … You cursed Kirishimas openness once more.

“So where are the drinks? Don’t keep your chefs waiting!” Kirishima was in an aggressively good mood, humming as he unpacked a few ingredients he brought and searching in your spice cabinet. You set to making the drinks.

There was a long silence, only interrupted by Kirishimas occasional humming.

A look at your glass told you that you were half done with the second drink before the others had even touched theirs. If Kirishima kept putting you in such uncomfortable situations you would turn into a full blown alcoholic. Annoyed with yourself and this ridiculous shyness around Bakugo, you started a conversation.

“So when am I gonna meet that cute fitness studio girl you keep talking about?” you asked, vaguely remembering that that was Kirishimas last crush. He took up the topic happily, falling down onto the couch next to you and leaving the kitchen to Bakugo.

“Oh no, that didn’t work out. Turns out she is the wife of the owner. On an unrelated note, do you have any recommendations for a new fitness studio?”

You laughed, very entertained with his latest misadventure. “Why can’t you just train in your agency like everybody else?”

“Well I do that too, but come on, do you really want me to keep _this_ ” he showed off his swollen biceps in a cartoonish gesture “from the civilian ladies? Have you got no concern for the all the normal girls?”

You hit him on the head with a newspaper. “You are impossible” you laughed, “Leave the poor girls alone. And what is it with your costume? Honestly, if you were any more naked you wouldn’t be allowed around kids!”

“Hey that’s because of my quirk, you know that! And we can’t _all_ date pro heroes, that is very undemocratic of you. Sure you aren’t just jealous?” You ignored a loud clang from the kitchen and tried to hit him again with the paper. No, you were not jealous and Kirishima knew that. You had become friends on your first day of school, when he had helped you out as some guys from his year bullied you over a botched landing. Through him you had made friends with many of the older students and even some U.A graduates like Tamaki who had interned together with Kirishima. Now, four years later, the redhead was something like an older brother to you, a very silly, very caring older brother.

You heard some agitated noises out of the kitchen. Without thinking much you called “Need any help in there?”

“Certainly not from you!” Was all that came back. Kirishima shrugged and filled both of your glasses again.

The evening had been fun, the food was better than anything you had had in the last few months – who knew Bakugo would be such an excellent chef? He was however a little lacking in the entertainment department, mostly brooding silently over his food or throwing in a snarky remark but you did not really mind, Kirishima and you kept the conversation going. The evening ended when you had fallen asleep on the couch after dinner. You vaguely remembered someone pulling a blanket over you and when you woke up much later the two boys were gone, leaving behind nothing but a box with leftovers in your fridge and a warm fuzzy feeling in your stomach after the nice evening.


	5. Chapter 5

_Hawks:_

When his alarm woke him this morning, his sleepy fingers found the snooze button before he immediately tried to fall back asleep, the alarm clock next to him on the pillow. Another dream of her…of his pretty bird. It had been a memory of their trip to Osaka, when she had been accompanying him to a hero conference. Her excitement had been a joy to behold and before the conference begun they had just enough time to discover the city a bit, giving the people underneath the beautiful sight of the two heroes gliding through the air above them side by side… The alarm begun buzzing into his ear once more, urgent as ever and Keigo gave up on going back to sleep and sat up, stretching himself in the early morning light.

Unfolding his wings Hawks finally rose, making his way to the shower. Now fully awake he began his day with a healthy breakfast accompanied by an excellent South American coffee. In the year since her graduation he had gotten used to company for breakfast... he tried to ignore it, but it had been strangely quiet. When he arrived at his agency to leave instructions for the coming days it was still early. He often rose with the sun, enjoying the quiet early hours when the world lay sleeping under him on his first flight of the day. Sometimes he picked a car on the highway and humoured himself by racing it, but in the end it wasn’t a real victory if only one of the parties involved knew they were competing.

For this weekend however he held high hopes. When Nezu had invited him to assist teaching the latest generation of U.A. students on a field trip Hawks had, to everyone’s surprise agreed immediately. And he only had the tiniest request: could they maybe invite his former favourite student too? They were such a well-tuned team, after all. Nono, there was no way he could ask her himself, it would be much more of an honour if U.A. asked themselves, she should not know that he had gotten her that invitation… And of course they agreed, not by any chance having expected for such a prominent hero to make time for teaching.

Admittedly, normally Keigo Takami would never have considered such a waste of his valuable time. But it might just be worth it for a chance to get this awful misunderstanding out of the world once and for all. The little rebellious stunt she had pulled had seriously inconvenienced him… Having to rely on Sidekicks that were less built to keep up with his pace and style of fighting and interacting, but much worse, it had really tickled his ego.

Of course, she would realize her mistake soon. They were made for each other, they were sun and moon, perfect partners, and while his fierce wings helped him in spying, rescue and fights, she had quite the skill for sneak attacks and turning any fight to her advantage with her quirks hidden qualities. But it was more than that, while they were a perfect match on the battlefield that was not all… No, they both loved to play – and to win. She knew how to drive him mad, after all she was practically his female counterpart: gorgeous, confident, competitive, extroverted, not as overly serious as most in their profession…and they both knew the advantages of presenting oneself favourably. It was a match made in heaven.

She had, however, proven surprisingly stubborn until now – but what was a victory worth without a fight? Maybe he would have to give her a little shove in the right direction. Having given in to his anger in the confrontation and stooping to intimidation were things he sincerely regretted – there was no way he would let himself be carried away like that. No, it was time to remind her how nice life had been by his side – and maybe have her understand how utterly unpleasant it could be without him.

_Your perspective:_

It took almost an hour for the bus that had picked you up from the train station to arrive at the station where you would all meet up. U.A. had insisted on no teachers flying there before the security was up and you all had to travel a day early to secure the premises. Apparently they had some incidents a few years ago, which might explain why you had never gotten such training off U.A.s campus, that was probably why they had requested so much backup too. When the old yellow bus finally arrived after crawling around a wounded mountain road for the past 40 minutes you got outjust to watch your suede boots immediately be covered in a layer of dust. Your mood was not ideal, to say the least, being forced to rely on public transportation was a real buzzkill. The sun shone down mercilessly and it took you a moment of fumbling around in your purse to find your sunglasses.   
This was…remote. Heck, remote was not even doing this place justice, the ‘bus stop’ was just a lonely pole next to the dirt road and besides that you could see no sign of civilisation. But that made sense of course, where else would a bunch of kids training their quirks not attract attention? And yet, you look around uncomfortably…you were a city girl, growing up in japans biggest metropole… plants and wild animals were something one looked at in flower stores and zoos. Wilderness was not your area of expertise, the closest you had gotten to being in the wild had been a 'camping trip' in your grandmother’s garden. Standing here with the sun burning down on you, you began to wonder if coming had really been such a good idea.

Finally your ride arrived, a giant monster of a Jeep, covered in dust and dirt and raising the uncomfortable prospect of another long trip over the bumpy dirt road. The car doors open to let out two figures. First you could not really make them out against the lowered afternoon sun. Then the man who stepped out on the side closest to you made a step forward you and you recognized Mr. Aizawa, who seemed to enjoy the environment about as much as you did. His mood appeared even more foul than usual, which was a feat in and of itself.

The other still stands in front of the sun, a golden hue around his head and seemingly wearing a big long coat. The coat seems to blow upwards, you did not even feel a breeze – with a snap gigantic wings open. The light falls orange trough the thinner ends. Like an ancient sun god Keigo Takami looms above you in his glory and for a moment your mind goes blank. This was…unexpected.

“See, Eraser, that’s how you make the ladies speechless!” Keigo grins widely down at you, closing in and plucking your suitcase out of your numb fingers. All the blood seems to have left your body. While the arrogant bastard loaded your luggage into the trunk you tried to get the feeling in your legs back. Eraser could not possibly have looked less interested in your personal interactions and gestured you to hurry and get into the backseat.

“Why is _he_ here?” you finally bring out. Not very polite but in your mind you were reliving your fall out of the skies again. He could have killed you…

“Persistence” Aizawa grimly replied. Hawks must have pestered him for a ride.

“Oh I had to come welcome you. I would have driven myself but _these_ -“ he stretched his wings lazily, showing off the fiery glow they had in the sun “really get in the way when I’m behind the wheel. And since they allow no flying during the preparations before all the security measures are ready…Well, they are pretty paranoid with this whole thing, Nezu practically requested a small army to secure the place, that’s why I recommended you too.” The smile he gives you this time would have seemed encouraging and kind to you if you had not seen his true face so recently. Instead it just looked like him pressing your buttons, showing the opportunities he offered and the power he still had over you. You were here because he had wanted you to be. You bit your tongue, refusing to reward him with a response. It was a tense, quiet car travel, where you uncomfortably tried to avoid the golden eyes staring at you in the rear-view mirror.

Hawks had not exaggerated when he joked about Nezu requesting a small army for this seminar. You would only stay over the weekend but the camp seemed set up for the coming two weeks. The students would arrive tomorrow morning, after the premises were checked and secured. Keigo and you would be the eyes in the sky and also watch over the students when they would fight their way through the forest tomorrow morning. But there were at least a dozen other heroes already here. You recognized a few of them, Ibara, Ochako and Sero and a dark young man who reminded you eerily of Eraserhead. Shindo? Shouto? Shot you a cold glare when you arrived, covered in dust, regretting to have chosen heels and a blazer and probably looking like you could not wait to shower.

‘Stare all you want’ you straightened your back, chest out, shoulders tense, facing the discouraging welcome. You knew what guys like that thought of you, seeing you as Hawks doll faced play thing that had gotten everything handed to her – you made a mental note to outshine him later, maybe you would get a chance to face him to show a combat excecise. You could for the life of you not remember his name, they were all from Kirishimas grade, one year above you…If he had been important you had remembered him, you decided, giving him a challenging glare right back. You were the youngest hero present. Snipe was another teacher who had already arrived and you remembered Pixie-BOb from your own trainings sessions on school grounds where she had visited, though the wild wild pussycats had disbanded after the loss of one of their team members she seemed to still assist in teaching the younger generations. Two of the gathered group were even former Shiketsu students, apparently Nezu had decided to not only invite U.A. alumni, well of course, after all Hawks was no former U.A. student either. The young hero Grand quickly introduced himself as Yo Shindo (you greeted back respectfully and with a bright smile, never passing on a chance to make allies) and behind him, in the shadow of a tree you recognized Sisicross, the hero Shishikura Seiji with his feared meatball quirk and overly serious demeanour. Taking another look around you tried to gather what this wild mix of heroes might have in common… at first glance you had wondered if they just took anyone who had the time but then you realized it and grinned. So the first few days would be all about ranged and support combat quirks. Interesting…you would have a lot to show those students once they arrived.

The terrain that had been prepared was varied but all of it would be described as wilderness. Dry open planes with rocky hills that turned to mountains, only interrupted by the occasional mountain stream. Those treacherous waters were no more inviting than the empty dry lands surrounding them, with violent currents and sharp stone spikes hidden under the surface. You had not even known japan had such landscapes, they might just have been prepared by U.A. to offer an environment as inhospitable as possible. Beyond the hot planes awaited a lush forest, a welcome source of shadow offering cover from the elements as well as enemies but that relief would be short-lived once the students actually entered…Not only had the teachers prepared traps and other nasty surprises for them, but there were also Pixie-Bob’s creations to take into account. This would certainly be no easy territory to conquer… Most of the time you would be searing far above the terrain, waiting for one of your sensors to alert you if one of the students would get into severe danger or if anyone entered the training grounds unpermitted. But on the last day there would be a proper fight training, teaching the students to defend themselves against ranged attacks and Hawks and you were the personification of a hard to hit target that would do damage from afar. If it had not been for his insistence not to let you forget his presence, you would truly have enjoyed this.

_Hawks:_

In front of the others there was no chance for a real talk, but that did not mean that Keigo did not try his best to coax her into a casual conversation. With a smile as bright as the searing sun above them he took part in any and all conversations, living up to his reputation as the most personable, relaxed and open of the Top 10. His patience was getting seriously tested when she proceeded to cling to whatever company was around to avoid a conversation alone. Keigo had caught her looking at him when she thought he might not notice, a thoughtful expression on her face – and at least a hint of something he knew too well. It was the kind of look younger girls often gave him – not the blind adoration of his fans but rather a…cautious curiosity mixed with intimidation. She might not want to admit it to herself, but she was not half as averse to his interest as she had insisted. Hawks sent her a winning smile that went promptly ignored in favour Yo Shindo’s boastful retelling of his last villain battle.

He sent her an annoyed look. _You can’t be serious about this boisterous child._ If Hawks was a lion, this boy might be fit for a housecat. Holding back a strained expression he turned away. _She would never even talk to this man-child if it wasn’t to annoy me._

Afterwards she was obviously threatening to spend the evening in the company of Uravity and the girl with the plant hair. He remembered that the plant girl had been a friend of hers…he wondered if his little bird had come to her to pour out her heart about how things had turned sour between the two of them…If yes, the green haired girl did not betray her thoughts about the whole situation.

“Uuuuh you have to come to my cabin, we’ll make it a girl’s night!!! I got face masks and hair masks and a tiny little bottle of prosecco – it will be a grand time!” the excitement in _her_ voice was genuine and any other time he would have let her have a good time with the other girls – _after_ things were cleared between the two of them. So he left the faculty break room and took out his phone. A brief call to Deku, checking in and mentioning that Ochako had made a slightly down impression during dinner did the trick. Now to the plant girl – he caught up to her when she was out on her way to the bathroom – a few well-chosen words and he had brought on a heated discussion. A minute later the girl had gone to her cabin and slapped the door closed in front of his face, hissing something about praying for his soul – this had been easier than expected. With a swagger in his step Keigo made his way back to the break room, entertaining himself by watching his pretty bird grow increasingly impatient as she waited for her girlfriends to return. He pretended to read for a while until he got up, making his way over to her, it was finally time to –

She was immediately on her feet, gliding through the room towards the two lonely guys in the corner of the room. The whisper of her feathers as she passed him sounded like a sweet promise and the way she swayed her hips with each step was as irresistible as ever. The familiar sweet, clean scent filled his nose and for a moment he just wanted to pull her close and hug her, resting his head on hers as he sometimes did when he had comforted her – then she had passed, sliding into an armchair between Hitoshi Shinso and Seiji Shishikura. Hawks picked up his book, trying not to react to that open slight.

“So what’d I miss, kids?” she jumped right into the conversation. Hawks had to give her props for having guts, the two boys had made pretty clear over the day what they thought of young little city heroes waltzing in here with tight cut outfits and flawless hair – Hawks had the suspicion that the fact that, thanks to his guidance, she comfortably outranked them both by popularity as well as solved cases despite having graduated a year later, had more than a little to do with their aversion. But a part might also be the difference in personality or simple old sexism, not liking a frivolous little thing outpacing them as heroes.

“We are discussing the dignity expected of alumni of prestigious schools like U.A. and Shiketsu High, not a subject that would interest you I fear-“ Seiji began in a tone that was surely meant to sound superior.

“Oh you are right there. I always thought that things like dignity and grace are subjects you only ever need to discuss if you lack in them. Nobody needs to have lengthy debates over something that comes to them easily, I guess. Anything else you have been up to?”

Shinso snorted laughter into the tea he was drinking. Seiji was about to respond, surely voicing what exactly he thought about her and her dignity when they were mercifully interrupted by Aizawa them, reminding them that the next day would start early.

_Your perspective:_

The ceiling above your bed seemed to press down on you. You rolled to your other side, trying to will yourself to sleep but every time you closed your eyes you saw Keigos golden gaze. The sheer weight of them seemed to tear on you. Memories forced their way into your mind and no matter how you tried to shove them to the back of your mind, they always found their way back into your thoughts…

The incessant stares he had given you tonight, observing every motion, the sharp lines of his cheeks and chin that softened so charmingly when he smiled…Your mind wandered back to that evening in Osaka after that hero conference. The speeches had bored you out of your mind but you had entertained yourself by trying to recognize every hero present…After six endless seeming hours Keigo had invited you for drinks, after all you were not working here and in a city so packed with heroes it was unlikely that the two of you would be needed tonight…And under the golden lights of the hotel bar you had realized once more how gorgeous he could be. You were not used to drinks, not at all and Hawks had been pretty entertained when you opened up and exchanged embarrassing stories from your school time. And as the evening went on…

 _No._ Your eyes snapped open and you hopped out of bed, reaching the window and pulling it open. The cold night air helped clear your head a little. It took a while before you dared to go back to bed, hoping that this time you would be able to fall asleep without further distractions. The hourly lookout flights over the terrain should have left you spent and tired but apparently the agitation that had stirred in you as you met your old Sensei was stronger.

When an alert woke you around two a.m. you could not have gotten much more than half an hour of sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

You were soaring through the night air. The alert had brought the entire camp to their feet. While some of the less mobile heroes were checking the surveillance footage and a half dressed Yo Shindou had showed his hands in the dirt, claiming that would let him feel all vibrations in over a mile radius, it had been Hawks and you who had been sent out to check the area that had sent the signal.

Quietly you thanked the heavens that the students had not yet arrived as you were letting your wings carry you through the fresh night air to the sensor that had caused the alert.

Something must have breached ’the shield’, a complex mixture of technology and a new quirk based system for shielding off big areas. Hawks and you had separated, that way you could clear a far greater area. You wished you had not forgotten your earpiece on your nightstand when rushing out to investigate, it would have been nice to be able to coordinate with the others. Instead you kept your eyes and ears open, gliding over the dark forest…It was an uncomfortable feeling, without the protection of city lights underneath you, you suddenly were very visible against the almost full moon and there could have been a thousand eyes in the forest glaring up at you, without you ever noticing. This reconnaissance mission was utterly useless. A shudder went down your spine. This darned camping trip was so not your element.

When you came to the approximate area that had sent out the alert you scanned the surface closely and soon discovered someone already waiting for you with a flashlight in hand. _Of course he had been faster._ Strangely you almost felt grateful not to have to check the surroundings for intruders by yourself. It was stupid, but better the devil you know…-

For a moment you were completely blinded by the light, then he stopped shining it straight into your face and you could see just who you had expected standing there with a neutral expression.

“Feathers and a dead squirrel.” Keigo lifted up something furry and misshapen you could not entirely make out in the dark and you quickly averted your eyes. “Looks like some animal attacked a feeding owl, setting off the alarm when she knocks down our scanners here. Open and shut case, let’s get back to bed.” You half expected him to push for the talk he seemed to have wanted to have over the course of the evening but instead Hawks just gave you a collegial nod. “Thanks for coming so quickly, it’s good to know I would have had backup if it really was something. I will still check out the area a bit, but you should go back to camp and inform the others that it was nothing.” You thanked him, trying to hide your surprise at this amiably polite interaction and took off to do as you had been told. After briefly informing everyone that the situation had been cleared you still stuck around a little, after the excitement the previous weariness had left you entirely. It was a lovely night, with an almost full moon presiding over a sea of stars above you and a fresh breeze clearing your head.

“There you are. Missed me?” Keigos voice had you spinning on your heel. Soundlessly he had landed just a few steps behind you. Too close for comfort. This Keigo was entirely different from the one you met earlier. The overconfident air around him made the hairs on your back raise and his walk had a relaxed swagger as he stalked towards you. Yet you did not let that fool you, the inviting smile was contrasted by a hungry look in the golden abysses you had almost drowned in too often… He had been drinking, you recognized at once, otherwise he never let his guard down like this, something you should have noted before…

“You should not drink at work.” You brought out, stupidly, it was none of your business after all…

“Guess I couldn’t bear watching you embarrass both of us over the evening. Yo Shindo, really?! If I had known you wanted an overly eager pet I would just have gotten you a puppy.”

“Oh god, don’t tell me you are jealous of every man I talk to. In that case I have pretty bad news for you, half the population is male, better get used to it now.”

Hawks let out an agitated sigh. “Is this really how you want to have this conversation? I hoped you were above childish provocations.” _Mighty brave of him to say, after all he was the one starting these pointless provocations._

“And I thought you were above blacklisting me!” you countered. You had not wanted to bring it up but in truth his betrayal had hurt you more than you cared to show.

“Oh please, we both know that this idea of leaving was a hastily made decision, I understand that you felt that was the right thing to do but I just won’t let you ruin your career like that by working for some cheap wannabees. Once you get back to your senses and understand the mistake you made we can talk this all out.” The bastard actually _believed_ what he was saying.

“Talk out what exactly?” your tone was sharp as ice “My work as your sidekick? Your inappropriate behaviour towards me? The fact that you threatened to kill me when I refused to tell where I work now?"

Hawks tense jaw betrayed his anger, despite the smile still lingering. “It was not my proudest moment but what do you expect with the way you behave? Suddenly trying to cut all ties to me, trying to play me like a fool, acting like there was nothing between us – we both know what you were doing. I just wanna know who he is.”

“You can’t be serious. Are you that convinced the only reason I could be not ok with your behaviour has to be another man?! This is ridiculous, Keigo!”

“You really wanna play it this way, huh? I mean it’s cute that you don’t dare to tell me but I am afraid I must insist…” Something about the fire in his eyes made you step back, but he closed in even more and from endless hours of training you knew exactly that you could not outrun nor outfly him. Whenever you were coming back from a patrol together and still had some energy in you he would race you back to the agency, over rooftops and through tunnels. He had insisted that it was part of your training but you had begun to suspect early on that he just enjoyed it. Keigo _loved_ to win, especially against someone who offered a good fight. He was not a good winner, looking far too pleased with himself and reminding you again and again how you never managed beat him, though it had been close at least once, in your opinion – but he was an even more unpleasant looser, as you had seen, though never in a race. Nobody beat Keigo in a race.

“You missed me, I know you did.” He suddenly said. “You know you need me, why can’t you just get over your stupid pride and come back? We belong together, look at us, we are made for each other-“

“You hit me. When I asked to work for a different agency you freaked out and slapped me. I will not forgive you for that.” Your voice was more calm than you felt but after dreading another confrontation for so long, after thinking so long about what you would say to him the next time you met alone it had just come over your lips.

“I didn’t mean to, you know that, you know I would never… I panicked, I didn’t want to lose you, I…” he broke off, seemingly unsure what to say. Now he was close enough for you to smell the Whisky on his breath, whisky and cigarettes…Keigo only smoked when he drank, rare enough occasions usually. It was strange to hear him like that, so desperate…it sounded wrong. This all was a strange farce. You had never been a couple, never gotten overly intimate besides a drunken mistake neither of you had ever mentioned afterwards, sure, there had been certain…moments. Something unspoken, a silent agreement not to cross a certain line, after all you had been student and teacher, Hero and Sidekick …. But admittedly you had scratched that line all the times when you fell asleep together on the couch after a long day and you woke hours later, a cozy, comforting tangled mess of feathers and wild hair…

“Keigo I will go to bed now. I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” You never talked about feelings back then, why start now? A sudden shove pushed your back against the tree behind you, you had not noticed that you had stepped back far enough to have reached the edge of the forest.

“Keigo, don’t-“ but a violent kiss swallowed your protest, lips crashing into yours, the overwhelming scent of whisky and smoke mixed with Hawks very own faint fragrance of cologne and soft leather. It was as intoxicating as it was surprising, for a moment you were caught completely off guard. Then you felt his hands lifting you. Finally you were in control of your senses again, struggling against the tight embrace. If you let him take off with you, you had no idea where this would lead, out alone in the woods together and as long as he held on to you a fight in the air would not go in your favour. He might be drunk, but also much stronger and that kiss had told you that he certainly meant to address feelings tonight…

You tried to reach for a spot close to the base of your wings to pluck one of the small, sharp feathers that sprouted there, an aubergine colour so dark it was almost black and at its sharp shaft there would be a coating of just what you needed right now-

“Don’t you fucking dare that!” Hawks voice was not much more than a whisper, but it carried pure fury. A painfully strong hand closed around your reaching hand and squished it, causing you to let out a pained noise.

Behind you in the woods you hear branches breaking. Keigo heard it too, trying to take off with you once more but you desperately block his wings with yours, not letting him take you away…Again he tried to fight you down, another pained squeal escaped your throat-

“Hey is there someone?”

The weight that was pressing you against the tree is suddenly gone, a rustling of feathers above you as you fall exhausted to the ground.

“Fell out of the sky?” The sarcastic voice belonged to the purple haired, gloomy young hero you had met earlier with the others, the one you had dubbed ‘ young Aizawa’. He almost sounded as bored and annoyed as the teacher too.

Embarrassed you got to your feet, brushing off the dirt that he surely could not see in the dark. “I’m all good, thanks.”

“I didn’t ask.” He was rude, but right now you might have dissolved into tears from a friendly word. He might not have known it, but he had just saved you.

“I’ll bring you to your cabin.” It was not a question and so you did not answer, just following the tall young man towards the camp. There was no goodnight when you arrived, but he waited until your door had closed. There, in the darkness of your cabin you sat, your back leaned against the door, confused as the pictures of the last minute stormed in on you again. Not so long ago you had secretly dreamed of Keigo admitting such feelings to you but now all you felt was lost.


	7. Chapter 7

Principal Nezu had been informed of the false alert and recommended everyone to stay on guard, as if he had to tell you that. At breakfast it seemed like the others had not gotten much sleep either, Ochako was yawning over her pancakes, seemingly about to fall asleep right then and there. Another long night call with Deku, you presumed. Shinso looked as tired as always, second only to Aizawa, who seemed especially moody this morning. When coming for breakfast you had heard him argue with Nezu on the phone, something about it being a terrible idea from the beginning and that the last time students came to harm – but you were out of earshot soon and you were not in the business of spying on your former teachers. Seiji ignored you so aggressively when you entered that you had to hold back a laugh. He should really work on his humor. That was nothing, however, compared to the cold shoulder Ibara gave Hawks when they ran into each other at the buffet. If he had not quickly jumped out of her way she might have shoulder checked him into a large platter with a tower of stacked melon slices. This time there was no way of holding back the chuckle, but only Shinso was close enough to hear, Ochako who sat opposite you was starring blankly at the wall. Poor girl, you thought, deciding to get her another cup of coffee. If she didn’t snap out of it until the youngsters arrived, the combat/survival exercise might leave a serious scratch on her reputation.

Soon Hawks had found a seat with the teachers and older heroes. Pixie Bob and he entertained themselves by aggravating Aizawa with increasingly pointless small talk, never enough to give him an excuse to leave or lash out but just enough to drive him slowly insane as they looked at him with innocent expressions. You knew this side of Keigo, he could not resist toying with heroes who took themselves overly serious. Endeavor was his preferred target for these kinds of jokes, not that he did not admire the hero, quite the opposite, maybe that was why he liked being able to mess a little with him.

Finally, it was time. Hawks and you would take off last to meet the students at the entrance, as you had faster means of transportation than the rest, so you used the time to freshen up once more and switch into your classic hero costume. Then you decided to take off five minutes early, so you would not need to fly together.

_Hawks perspective:_

Of course, the little beast had taken off early, to avoid him – so childish, Keigo thought, almost rolling his eyes as if she could see him. She could not be far ahead yet – with a grin he took off. If she wanted to race, he would be the last to protest.

They arrived together, of course, he had slowed down after catching up. Seeing her in the hero uniform he had ordered for her when she joined his agency had been…unexpected, to say the least, but he took it as a good sign. Designed to match his, though more slim cut and in a light blue, blending into the sky, it complimented her slender figure and underlined their kinship, same material, same faux fur collar, same goggles and the same pilot look. As they had silently roamed the area, watching the students under them exit the school bus, it felt as if everything was back to normal. The sky belonged to them. A warm feeling swept over him, something he had thought lost in the past weeks.

Upon landing he heard the excited whispers and felt at least 30 curious pairs of eyes on him. Giving them a friendly welcome, everyone quickly told who they were, though Hawks needed no introduction, then Aizawa explained the details of today's task – the students were to fight their way through the forest, against the attacks of the present heroes and withstanding the rough terrain. Some of the students protested, others just groaning or wondering how they should fight that many pro heroes – ‘ _As if we wouldn’t hold back’,_ he thought, already bored with such pointless complaints. Only a few seemed excited about the challenge. A brunette girl kept her eyes transfixed on him the entire time. He noticed his pretty bird getting uncomfortable next to him, apparently she had noticed the school girls attention too. Keigo made a mental note, maybe that unconscious jealousy would be a last resort to get her to understand her own feelings. The end of Aizawas speech caught him unaware, he was still taking in the slender figure next to him in her light blue uniform when he heard his own name.

“Hawks, what are you waiting for? You and your Sidekick are supposed to stay above, helping students if they get in over their head.”

Not betraying a hint of his embarrassment he put on a motivated smile instead, holding up his thumb. “Ready for take-off!” he grinned, then he was in the air.

_Your perspective:_

It had been four hours already and besides pulling a boy out of the river you had not done much. While your eyes searched the forest and you waited for alarms of scanners detecting a student in need, your mind had begun to wander. Last night had been…strange, to say the least. Keigo had behaved completely professional towards you during the alert but just shortly after he had been like a different person…you were not sure how you would describe what he did there. For a moment you had considered telling Nezu, or Aizawa, or someone… but something had held you back. What if they did not believe you? Or worse, what if they did not care? Bakugos cruel words came to mind… And you knew how many people thought like that. As if accepting his help as a student meant you had agreed to be his _possession_! So…what if they believed you? Would you want to make it public? The thought horrified you, laying out every detail of your relationship to Hawks for public judgement. Did you want to see him convicted, end his career? You were searching for a lust for vengeance inside you but all you found was confusion.

You let your eyes wander about the stony desert stretching out beneath you.

Confusion and hurt. Hawks was the only one who had always believed in you. He had found you, when you were lost in the world and encouraged you to become a hero, challenging you, pushing you, he had given you a sense of self-worth. His betrayal, the fact that he would turn against you like this, that he only saw you **that** way – it suddenly hurt. The thought he might think of you this way had always been enjoyable in the past, a forbidden fruit, an impossible little daydream, but now that you knew and it had turned out this way –

Underneath you was a figure, sheltering themselves in the shadow of a boulder against the brutal heat. As you circled in closer you saw it was a girl, her clothes torn and- were those blood spots on the arm of her shirt? – Immediately you swept down towards her. How could no sensor have alerted you that someone got injured? You landed, recognizing the brunette who had given Hawks longing stares earlier. The poor thing had been attacked, obviously, and was rambling when you asked her what was going on. Then she pointed behind you, terror on her face. You turned but there was nothing – the sound of metal cutting through the air made you jump back.

“Aw, I almost got you, don’t you wanna play, bird lady?” she spoke singingly, giggly almost, her face now focused but you ignored all that, concentrating only on the knife in her hand. Another jump back, then you took off, staying just outside her reach. You had not known knives were allowed, that seemed rather dangerous – but you were pros, the risk of them harming you was small after all. The blood on her clothes was dried, you saw now, if she had injured herself she was obviously fine again.

“I am not one of the teachers you have to fight”, you explained to the girl, annoyed by the random attack.

“Might be, but I saw how Mr. Hawks looked at you. I thought I would take some _initiative_.” She giggled and for some reason a shudder went down your spine. This girl did not seem to have the character a hero needed. You decided to discuss the event with Aizawa once you met him, but now you should get back to making sure the other students stayed safe.

“Do you need a first aid kit? Or to be brought to the camp for medical attention?” the girl shook her head, smiling up at you. You were glad about the distance between you.

“Ok I’ll leave for now but make sure you don’t actually injure someone, this is still training. I will discuss this incident with your teachers.”

It was maybe half an hour later that a group of birds circling above a bushy area drew you in closer to inquire. A hint of white drew your attention when you found her – the girl who had attacked you before. Just that now she was only in her underwear, her skin reddened by the merciless sun. The girl seemed unconscious and quickly you found two bad looking knife wounds and several small, round openings, like from an enormously big needle. All alarm bells in your head were ringing. Even with a powerful quirk it was unlikely that the girl had made as much distance in the last half hour as you had, in other words: someone had attacked her and stolen her identity.

Urgently you tried reaching someone over your earpiece but the only answer was silence. That was when you began to fear the worst. You patched up the girl, giving her your uniform jacket as somewhat of a protection against the sun and bringing her into the shadow, where she briefly woke, long enough to drink a few sips of water. She had clearly suffered from the heat where she must have laid for several hours after a severe loss of blood, yet she managed to describe her attacker, a blonde school girl with a knife and several cartridges with needles at the front, with which she had fought. You decided to wrap her lower half in some of the left over bandages, against the sun and prying eyes, then you shouldered the girl and made your way towards the camp.

She had soon passed out again, but taking her through the shadow of the trees would only prolong the time needed to get her to the camp, where she could be properly treated. The weight and need to fly more carefully in order not to drop or injure her severely impacted your speed , but you tried not to worry unnecessarily now. Concentrate on the mission at hand.

The unmistakable smell of fire set you on alert long before you see the blue flames under you eating away at the forest. Soon you notice group of eight students together with Yo Shindo fighting off attacks by dozens of the same man in a white mask, a multiplying quirk. You wish you could stop to help them but none of them need your help as much as the girl you are currently carrying. So all you do is shout down all the information you have, about a female attacker who seems to be able to take other peoples forms, about the blue flames closing in, that you are bringing an injured student to camp, a little brunette girl and that if they see her out here, they should be careful of a double… Quickly you move on, worrying for the injured girl who’s situation is getting more dire by the minute, prolonged unconsciousness is a serious business – Shouts from ahead interrupt your thoughts. A group of students tries fighting off the flames as they help each other find their path through the smoke. You want to hurry your injured burden to safety but these kids obviously need assistance. You fly lower, trying not to breathe in too much of the smoke. With the children you can see a familiar purple haired man. Shinsou Hitachi, as you remember from the introduction to the students this morning. He must have been an obstacle fighting the students when they got caught by the flames.

“Follow my voice! Here, above you, I can lead you to safety!” finally Shinsou hears you and drags the students in your direction, he is carrying a boy who’s leg looks badly burned, you wished you could come down and help but you already have someone to save and getting lost in the smoke with them would doom you all. You manage to lead them to one of the wide wild rivers that separate the different parts of the territory, a natural obstacle with treacherous cliffs and a violent current. Some students manage to pass it with their quirk and are safe from the fire on the other side, and a horned young man of giant built offers to carry the injured girl you had been holding to the camp so you could help the others. Knowing the terrain from above you tell him that walking upriver to the camp will bring them to the campsite quickly and he takes off at impressive speed. The next step is to evacuate the last five students, to carry them over one by one if you have the strength. The boy in Shinsous arm certainly will have need of that. And Shinsou – he does not seem to have the kind of quirk required for this –

“Someone is coming.” The young hero’s voice is tense, he takes a fighting stance immediately while you take the injured boy from him, setting him down on the other side of the river and returning just as the two villains step out of the woods.

“I told you it’s not Hawks, much too slow.” The speaker has a dark voice that sends chills down your back but even more unsettling was his face.

“Shut up, they look the same from underneath.” The second villain was a reptilian man with a giant sword made of all kinds of stripped together metal weapons, you did not recognize him either.

“I told you it’s not him, we are wasting our time-“

“Fine, you were right, are you fucking happy now?!” their squabbling was unsettling, they ignored you as if you were no match for them.

“Let’s finish this quickly and move on.” Pretty damn confident…

“What do you guys want here anyways? You really think you got a chance against two seasoned pros?” Shinsous voice is cocky and challenging but neither of the villains answers.

You stay silent, signalling the leftover kids kids with a hand behind your back to fan out and disappear into the woods once they got a chance their friends on the other side would surely help them escape the flames and cross the river. If you could keep these two guys busy long enough for the students to escape, nothing would stop you from just flying away and leaving these two to their bickering. Nothing but Shinso. You inspected the man head to toe, lean and trained, probably heavier than you looked, but you would manage as long as he held on to you.

You took off slowly staying just a foot above the ground, shielding the kids behind your broad wings. “Now!”


	8. Chapter 8

Fanning out in several directions the students ran, one tall girl bravely passing the enemies closely, successfully dodging a burst blue fire the terrifying scarred villain sent towards her. Another student used a shield quirk, defending himself against the reptilians bizarre weapon and you decide to go all in, coming down onto the two villains as if to start a meele, those valuable seconds in which they believe they need to defend themselves were enough for two of the students to be helped to cross the river and the other three to escape into the woods. The scarred man gives you an angry look and then sends one of his blue bursts towards you, missing and shooting past you towards the water. Your grin is wiped of your face by Shinsos call.

“The other side of the river!” A single glance over your shoulder proved him right, the blue flames are spreading now, over there, where you had sat down the boy with the injured leg – the sound and a swirl of air warned you. Pulling up a moment too late you screamed as steel bit into your leg, that second of carelessness was enough for the reptilian’s sword to just reach you.

Two villains were too many – you plucked out a few of the soft, plum coloured feathers that grow just a bit above where your wings meet your back. They are small, though their quill hardens into sharp projectiles within seconds. It was time to decimate the number of enemies you were facing in this battle. Meanwhile Shinsou was holding off the scarred villain, fighting with a weapon not unlike Aizawas binding scarf, you heard him provoke the man but his opponent remained quiet. Then, the villain sent a burst of flame towards you, Shinsou lept forward to attack him – right into his enemies waiting arms. A burst of blue flame grazed his arm. The scream told you it had been enough.

This was the moment. You sent three of the feathers flying towards the man who had just maimed your colleague, he saw them coming and burned them to a crisp but that meant he was blinding himself, separated from you by a wall of bright blue. That moment was enough – you had not trained under Hawks for nothing – you were behind him before his flame even expired, sending the last two feathers down on him – they stuck, one of them in the villain’s neck. He only had time to raise his hand to feel what had stung him before he dropped unconscious.

Behind you, you heard the student calling from the riverbank, the fire was closing in. Desperate you turned, not knowing what to do. You had to save the kid, were already off the ground when you saw the young hero next to you drop to his knees, unable to stand anymore, shaking - The reptile man closed in, you were getting ready to sweep in, carry him over, but there were the flames waiting, how would you get them both out of here – Shinso was injured badly too and had breathed in the smoke for an extended period. You had seen the first signs of how much it had impacted him and the moment the adrenaline left his body he might well faint but there was no safety on the ground anymore and you could never carry them both. Leaving him here alone against a villain though-

“Birdy?”

“Yes?”

Your eyes glazed over. “ ** _You will fly over there and bring the student to the camp. You will leave this fight to me._** ”

You came to your senses at the camp, regaining control over yourself. Aizawa checked any new arrivals because one of the villains can take the form of others but when you can answer a few questions about your time at U.A. he trusts you. Immediately you took off again, but you couldn’t find Shinsou, or even where the battle took place. The area under you had turned into a sea of fire. What a fearsome quirk… Finally you leave the burning area to look for all those who had not found their way to the camp yet, tears streaming over your face from the smoke, you could not handle the heat and smoke much longer.

You were sure something had moved down there under the trees – you cursed the terrain for the thousandth time today, if this was a city or even just plains you would be at such an advantage but the forest left you in a very uncomfortable position, landing and taking off without breaking your wings in the branches were challenges but what was much worse was not being able to see what was going on underneath the thick green.

You circled above the area where you thought you had seen something, lower and lower until suddenly a burst of blue shot at you. The immediate pain in your wing seemed unbearable but it was nothing compared to what was waiting for you. The green of the trees was rapidly coming closer as you fell towards the forest and when you managed to catch yourself with desperate wing strokes all it did was slow you down enough to really feel what was happening to you as you crashed against branch after branch. You managed to gather your senses in the last moment and catch your fall with your left wing. An ugly noise announced you what the pain already told you. You would not fly back from here, if you managed to survive at all.

“Not _you_ again” the voice welcoming you was dark and familiar – this was the guy you had sent to bed with one of your purple feathers just a little while ago. _This could not be_ _happening_ – you took in your environment – his fire quirk was certainly at an advantage here, this whole area could turn into a very big bonfire pretty quickly, with your uselessly hanging down wing it was hard to even take cover behind the tree trunks.

“Not who you were hoping for, huh? Where is my teammate? What did you do with him?” you responded. Why not talk to him, winning time was all you could do right now. No response, only the cold, calculating stare. You tried to seem confident, as if you still had a lot of tricks up your sleeve if he tried to attack you again. How could he still be standing? _One_ feather should have sent him to dream land for the rest of the day, and he had taken two, nice juicy ones you had kept for an especially annoying enemy… the turquoise eyes stared at you, calculating. What a disturbing face, what had happened to– then you realized it.

“Opioids” of course, the guy was a villain, why should you think he was above abusing painkillers “you are taking opioids. That’s why you recovered so quickly-“

He gestured to his face and gave you an almost apologetic grin “for the pain” _makes sense,_ you had to admit. _And apparently even villains are uncomfortable discussing their medical history with strangers._ _Who would have thought?_ Just a shame that might cost you your life now.

“Makes sense.” You gave back, trying not to let your face show that you felt close to passing out. Right now you wished your quirk had not made you so utterly resistant to the pain killing substance your body produced, fighting in this state seemed near impossible. Heck, staying on your feet was quite the challenge. You turned towards the scarred guy, taking a fighting stance. It was a bluff, so much was clear, but you were scanning your surroundings for an escape route. The grim young man seems to have guessed your thoughts.

“Try to run and you will die here and now. I am in no mood to hunt you through this goddamn forest. And we both know you won’t be flying anywhere soon, little bird.” Not much you could say against that. Instead you widened your stance, hands up in a fighting position, waiting. He had the audacity to scoff at you.

“We both know I could cremate you in a second. But there is no need for that. I think we have something in common…”

“What in the world would _we_ have in common?!” You were talking about his villainy but you saw his hand wander to the scars in his face, as if to hide the charred and stapled skin unconsciously. _So even villains are a little vain, huh?_

“Fair enough” he said, his tone forced neutral “but we do have a common enemy. It was not you I was trying to shoot down.”

You swallowed hard. These guys were after Keigo. He began to smile when he saw the closed expression on your face. “Heroes…the bigger and more powerful they become, the easier it is to hide their ambition, their greed and cruelty and darkness behind that perfect facade.” By now he sounded disgusted, as if Hawks had personally insulted him. He continued.

“And nobody dares to speak up. They waltz in like they own the place and everyone agrees, who cares how he treats those around him, you are hardly more than _property_ in their eyes. After all he is the big number two-“ under the layer of cynicism you could hear pure hatred.

The words had cut right through you. “You watched!” you said, almost accusingly, as if it was all his fault now. How Keigo had overwhelmed you last night, forced a kiss on you - Tears of humiliation burned in your eyes but you would not let this guy see them. It did not make any sense that he should even care - something was strange about this, this was not just a speech to convince you, he genuinely believed what he said…

“My point is that both our lives might be a lot easier without Takami buzzing around any longer and you have the advantage of being able to get _very_ close to him” he gave you an apologetic smile, a proper one this time, but continued despite your disgusted face “U.A.s backup will be here soon and killing you won’t do much for me, you are a pretty small fish” _fuck you too,_ you thought “but I might come to you with a proposal in the future. Don’t think you can set me up, I am far out of your league, darling” _as if the bastard could read minds!_ “Just keep an open mind.”

And with that he turned and left. The pain had clouded your mind but you knew you had to go on, search for Shinsou, get back and warn Hawks, warn someone, help the students – Desperately you tried to take off, two meters, three, the forest around you was spinning. Then everything went black.


	9. Chapter 9

_Hawks Perspective:_

Seeing her this broken, her wing burned and mangled, being carried to the ambulance had hurt. But stronger than the concern in him was the anger. If he had been the one running into Dabi – and it must have been Dabi, the fight would surely have ended differently. His little bird was far from the hero he planned to mould her into. During the attack Keigo had managed to hold off three of the Villains and arrest one of them. It could have been a greater victory but he had mainly been concentrating on finding students and saving them.

Dabi… Keigo was staring down at a file in his laptop that showed the latest information about the League. They had known each other well, back when he had tried to get access to the League as a spy. In the beginning Dabi had been standoff-ish and distrustful, but after a few months of working together Keigo had managed to get closer to the dark young man. With a sinister sense of humour, a sharp tongue and even sharper mind and the quickest reflexes Keigo had seen in anyone besides himself, the young man made a fierce enemy – and an invaluable sparring partner. A few missions they underwent together turned what had begun as relative tolerance into respect and then –

Keigo would not use the word friendship. Dabi was a villain and he had been a spy, securing Dabi’s trust – but he could not help but smile at the memory of the evening when they had been stranded in a small industrial town after a mission and against all orders gotten outrageously drunk. Dabi had taught him knife tricks that would have left Keigos teenage self speechless, while Hawks did his best impressions of famous heroes – Endeavor had been Dabis favourite, he was practically rolling on the ground laughing as Keigo pretended with stern face and an angry- overly sincere tone demanding explanations as he acted as if he was incapable of understanding his surroundings and barked out a few grim threats.

After that they had sometimes just taken the time after a sparring session to sit out on the rooftop and look at the darkening sky, smoking a cigarette and sharing few words.

Hawks turned on the TV, watching the interview he had given earlier today replayed for the evening news. There was no way he wold usually have admitted it to himself, but he had not made as close a friend ever since. Some of the bad habits he had obtained back then still lingered, not because he could not stop, rather…he enjoyed it. It had been nice to have someone who came so close to being an equal, a friend, who did not see Hawks solely as a hero or as his deeds but just as another young man who goofed around, or mooched smokes when drunk and enjoyed kicking some ass in training.

Keigo sighed, pouring some whisky over the ice in his glass. Well, his former friend had torn his student/sidekick into shreds. That slightly offended him, if he was honest. With that much assistance she should have been able to hold her own against him at least for a while. Though, even to him the young villain had been a challenge, at least back then. When the girl was back at the agency, he would make her train twice as much, if she ever meant to stand a chance. And focus more on melee combat…

Annoyed he shook his head. Little sense adapting her training plan while she was still going through this belated teenage rebellion phase, if that really was what it was…

 _What if she lied?_ A cruel voice in the back of his head asked. She could be sleeping in someone else’s arms right now – unwanted pictures were rising in his mind, a faceless hero on top of her, her moaning another mans name – Keigo emptied his whisky glass at once, the burning sensation as he swallowed drowning out the unwelcome image. His stomach felt twisted and it was not the alcohol. Time for a bit of fresh air.

The moon above was finally full, but contrasted with the gleaming city lights it seemed small and dim and Keigo felt if he just reached out he could take the little pale ball and put it in his pocket.

The lights in her home were off, as so often when he had flown by lately. Lonely in the window stood the little Bonsai. He sighed. Things had been so much easier in the past. When she had admired him and taken his advice and this last year had been wonderful, after she graduated and they had worked together and spent their days in almost constant contact…

Downtown, over illuminated main streets crowded with cars and people hurrying home, hidden from their view in the evening sky, he flew. The building he circled to land this time was almost as familiar as her own home by now. The balcony door was open, letting out some of the yellow light and inviting in all kinds of bugs. Keigo landed on the balcony above, the neighbours seemed to be out tonight and it made a good spot to listen a bit.

“Well only because you cheated!” It felt good to hear her voice, even if it gave him a little sting to hear her banter with someone else like this. Somehow he had always hoped this tone was reserved for him alone. The noise of an opening fridge, then the fizzing of a soda can popping open was competing with some music in the background.

“Fine, fine! Next time I’ll let you win, you cry baby! Anyway, how’s work?”

“Great” that answer was dripping with sarcasm “I got plucked and roasted, that’s practically a promotion.”

“Touchy subject, huh? Come on, you gotta tell me a little, how comes you got it so bad? Need uncle Eijiro to show you some proper punches?”

“I’m gonna show _you_ some punches if you don’t shut up” Keigo wholeheartedly agreed with that moody statement. He had always considered the redhead a distraction, though by now that might be upgraded to an annoyance. Why did she have to spend so much time here anyways?

The vibrating of his phone almost made him fall from the balcony ledge. Downstairs the voices stopped – swallowing a curse Hawks took off, the last thing he needed was being caught here.

_Your perspective:_

“Was that your phone?” you looked up at your best friend. He was currently gulping down a melon soda while inspecting the still open fridge.

“Nah. ‘prolly outside. Anyway, I’m a little short on fresh ingredients, yesterday I had this cute girl over and-“

“No details, I beg you!”

“Please, _as if_. A gentleman knows to keep his secrets. What I meant to say is that I cooked an impressive dinner, so I wasn’t really prepared for you to come by and ask to be fed again-“

“It _almost_ sounds as if you are implying I would live of you-“ you pretended to pout, earning a laugh.

“I would _never_ imply such a thing. We should probably eat out tonight though, unless you feel like sharing a handful of bamboo shoots with…” he opened the pantry, looking for leftovers “ a package of instant chicken soup and four warm beers.”

You were just getting into your shoes, luckily you had forgotten a cute pair of heeled boots here when you had been surprisingly called for a villain attack a few weeks ago. Kirishima had extended considerably less efford than you, wearing some black training tanktop and jeans-shorts.

“Oh No Eijiro, this is my night out, you can’t do this to me!” you pointed at his shorts. “I took the time to wear eyeliner, come on!”

A minute later you were on your way down the stairs, Kirishima still in short pants and you considerably less excited about your great evening out.

“We’re just getting dinner” he pronounced, laughing about the insulted look you gave his attire.

“But since you are so starved for proper socializing, should I invite someone?” In truth, it wasn’t socializing you were starved for. After the attack on the camp and getting injured, you could really use a bit of normalcy, some distraction. You nodded, gratefully.

“Probably a bit short notice but sure. Let’s make it an event!”

Bakugo seemed confused by the invitation, declining in the end and saying he had better things to do anyway, Asui and Mina already had plans, a few people didn’t answer, surely working, but in the end Sero and Kaminari agreed to come – not at all the evening you had hoped for if you were honest, all of a sudden this had turned into a guys night. You picked a place with an all you can eat buffet that Suneater had recommended to you in the past – you had decided to invite Eijiro, as a thank you, but past experience had taught you that one could easily break the bank on inviting a male hero (or Momo for that matter) for dinner. While sitting on the low pillows on a traditional, low table and watching the guys ravage the buffet, trying to ignore Kaminari bragging about his last romantic conquests, you caught a glimpse of a red-white head of hair outside.

Todoroki Shoto was another former class A student – Bakugos and Dekus greatest rival, the boy with the two quirks. Though you had gotten to know many class A and B members through Kirishima, you never really talked to him.

Tonight however, you would be fine with any excuse to escape the endless bragging, guy jokes and ‘ **Duuuuuude** ’s. You threw your wallet over to Kirishima and he caught it without dividing any of his attention from Kaminaris crude jokes. Nodding towards the window you said something about wanting to ask Shouto if he wanted to join. Eijiro was far to entertained to pay you much attention.

You fled outside, relieved to breathe some fresh air, get a clear head. Shouto was still around, to your surprise, it had rather been an excuse, but he was looking at the sign in the window of a closed flower store. Joining him you read

‘Mondays to Fridays 9 a.m.-1 p.m. and 3-6 p.m., Saturdays 11 a.m.-4 p.m.’

“Hi Todoroki, everything ok?”

“Oh, hi Birdy.” That damned nickname. “I thought they would be open.” His voice was neutral. What an awkward cute guy. You almost laughed.

“It’s evening of course they are closed, have you never gotten flowers before?”

“Not really. Anyways, did you need anything?” He looked at you, you might have described it as curious but that was little more than a guess. You had always found Shoto hard to read.

“Yes, I mean No-“ he raised his brow, confused. You decided to be direct. “Well to be honest I am currently out with a group of friends from your former class. But it kind of turned into a guys night and not at all what I had in mind, so when I saw you I thought…” What had you thought? The unreadable hetero-chromatic eyes made you nervous.

“…if I knew if any of the girls were around? So it’s less of a guys night?” he offered. That actually made you laugh. He had such an odd way of thinking, you remembered now, you were not sure if it was endearing or just plainly weird.

“No, I guess I just wanted to talk to someone else for a minute.” You gave him an apologetic smile.

“Talk? Sure.” He nodded you over to a food stand. “I planned on eating a bite anyways.” For a moment you felt guilty for leaving Eijiro behind, but when you saw him through the window, laughing so hard about Sero’s antics that he almost spit his soda over the table and they had to start clapping his back, that feeling was quickly forgotten.

Shoto ordered his food. “So…” he turned to you, visibly trying to remember who exactly you were. “ You work for Hawks…right, I remember now, speed type flying hero, espionage, rescues…I think you were the one who got into a fight with Bakugo and lost horribly-“

“Yeah, that’s me” you interrupted him, feeling little inclination to relive old humiliations. “Though I left Hawks agency a bit ago.”

“That’s probably a good idea.” He said. The chef put down a bowl in front of him, it smelled delicious. This answer had caught you entirely by surprise.

“You’re the first one who sees it that way. Everyone else says I made a giant mistake.”

“Hm…I think not. After me you were the only other Legacy student.” Right, his father was Endeavor. “And Hawks was extremely involved, visiting you on campus, Watching most of your exams-“ you never thought he would have noticed…but of course, everyone had their eyes on Hawks. He had hardly remembered who _you_ were though. “If you stayed in his shadow, how should you ever surpass him? If I had gone the way my father wanted for me, whatever I did, in the end I would always just be Endeavors son.”

He understood it. A painful little smile showed on your lips, but Shoto had already turned towards his meal.

“Thank you, for saying that. It means a lot to me.”

He slurped some of his soup, then saying: ”A long time ago someone gave me real good advice.” He didn’t look at you while talking and you were thankful for that, it felt strange to talk about something this personal to someone you hardly ever spoke to before. “It’s yours. It’s your quirk, and whatever you make out of it is yours too. I really needed to hear that back then.”

You had no words to answer. It was as if he had looked right through you. _I really needed to hear that back then._ You wondered if he had also went through a hard time separating from his father, from the one who’s quirk is so similar and who’s legacy is so big…

A warm, heavy hand was put on your shoulder.

“Come on, little one, we are going to the gym, Kaminari said he is gonna kick Seros ass in training, you gotta come watch.”

“I think I’ll go home soon, sorry.” You said to the baffled Kirishima and smiled at Todoroki. “I have a lot to think about.”


	10. Chapter 10

“-seems to have left his agency. We report this information only a week after the attack on a U.A. training camp, where according to several sources the two have been facing the attackers together. Possible reasons for the breakup remain unknown, though the young former sidekick has been seen in the company of several other male pro heroes since. The heartbroken Number two hero refused an interview with the daily news and our reporters. His speaker explained Hawks was not ready to talk publicly about the situation. **That son of a bitch!** ” you let the newspaper fall on the table.

“Well at least he does not air out your dirty laundry in public-“ Kirishima took a large bite of his omelette on toast.

“But that is exactly what he is doing! Don’t you see, he is garnering sympathy, playing the victim, so the public believes whatever awful things he says about me when the time is ripe! And painting me as a… as a harlot in the meantime!”

“Harlot” Kirishima snorted into his breakfast but you ignored him. You did not see what was so hilarious about the word you used, or the fact that Hawks had made a public scene like that.

“Oh that goddamn bastard!” angrily you threw the newspaper in the garbage. Suddenly you did not feel like finishing your lunch anymore.

“I should hurry, Bakugo hates it when I’m late!” You got up, putting your dishes in the dishwasher and grabbing your costume to change into. It had been nice of Kirishima to invite you over for a late breakfast or rather an early lunch, today would be a busy day, first a patrol and then a sting operation the police had requested the agencies help for. When you emerged from the bathroom changed into the dark costume Bakugos agency had ordered for you, you felt a little better. The femme fatale look and skin hugging cut now made you feel more confident, like a real badass. You fixed your mask. Your wings did not match the look however, even after the attentions of U.A.s beloved nurse the villains attack had left an ugly injury hidden under layers of bandages that would take some time to heal. You tried to forget about it, maybe you weren’t back to normal yet but being a hero meant there was no time to ponder over past injuries, it was time to go out and get new ones. Or cause new ones, preferably on that stupid scar-faced bastard who almost roasted you alive or alternatively your old Sensei. Of course Hawks had made it out of that camp attack without a scratch, saving at least a dozen students personally. Now he was on a new popularity high, out to handle the press regarding the incident – and just by the by tearing your reputation to shreds. Sometimes scar-faces offer was getting pretty tempting…you had told the police that they had been after Keigo, of course…but in the confusion after the fight you had not mentioned the personal offer of revenge to you, it had just all been so overwhelming. Of course you would never work together with a villain, so there wasn’t really a reason to bring yourself under suspicion by association. You zipped your costume close and fixed your hair in a tight bun, then realizing that you would not be flying for a while now. With a sigh you pulled the hairband out, letting the bunched up curls cascade down your back. Unfamiliar.

“How do I look?”

“Stunning. Now go kick some butts!” you got a goodbye hug and left Kirishima, still in boxer shorts and bathrobe, to his breakfast.

Taking the metro was quite the experience. The smell, the stuffiness, the man sitting next to you coughing insistently without bothering to cover his mouth – when you finally returned to the surface it felt like it had been an eternity. You had never been comfortable underground. Luckily your patrol partner for today had agreed to meet in the city to shorten your way to work. Leaning against a lamp post about fifteen meters ahead you recognized the broad back in his black hero costume, the wild ashen mane untouched by the light breeze, seemingly oblivious to the two women who were shyly watching him and pointing, excitedly whispering to one another just meters away from him. You tried to understand what they saw in him…Sure, he had grown tall and built since U.A., his face still usually grim, but with less of an expression of anger than guardedness. Though still as explosive and short fused as ever, his behaviour had lost some of his cockiness. Not really much tamer than before, but maybe less violent. And he was an impressive fighter and hero, yes, but looking at him this way still felt strange. Why he had let Kirishima drag him to your home to cook for you last week was still a riddle to you though _. Lonely maybe, since he's out of school and can't bully the other kids anymore._ You grinned, that sentence would have brought you a hefty butt kicking in training if he knew. Maybe you could sneak up and give him a good scare –

“Birdy.” The blonde had not even turned around to you, had the sound of your steps warned him even in the crowded city? You straightened your back, pretending to never have planned any shenanigans. “If you plan to surprise me it would help not to wear the same unmistakable perfume you have since U.A..” Pouting you stepped up, but there had been another reason you had looked forward with working as a team today anyway. With your signature innocent look you fell in next to him as the patrol duty began.

“So King Explosion Murder it is, yeah?”

“Shitty hair couldn’t keep his mouth shut again, huh? Why are you constantly there anyways?” he gave you a challenging look and you blushed, deciding to ignore the insinuation.

“So it’s really true? _King Explo-_ “

“Oh shut your beak! I could make you address me as Sir if I wanted to, you know that?!” but the anger in his voice wasn’t real. Actually you suspected that Bakugo enjoyed having someone around who wasn’t intimidated by his attitude, at least not anymore. That at least had changed entirely since your graduation.

“Sure thing! Mr. King-Explosion-Murder, **_Sir_**!” you tried to go for a military salute, but having to hurry to keep up with his wide strides you were not sure it had the planned effect.

A few minutes of silence followed as you crossed a sidewalk, you got distracted by a cute puppy on a leash and had to jog to catch up again.

“So you ask about me a lot or what?!” What kind of question was that?

“I usually got better things to do but this morning at Eijiro’s we discussed me getting a proper hero name, you know, to disentangle my hero work from the whole Hawks story. It just came up –“

“So you sleep there now?” he could not have sounded more disapproving if he had tried. Geez, if he got any more protective of his best friend he could finally stop worrying about _your_ public relations disaster and focus on his own. The world of pros was still anything but open minded. _That_ kind of rumour would be enough to end a young career, as you knew too well. Even as a woman with anything resembling a sexuality it wasn’t easy, let alone seeming a bit too interested in your male best friends personal matters as a guy. But you wouldn’t dare to tell him that, not after you had something that almost amounted to a civil conversation. Rare enough occasions.

“So?!” Insistant. Annoying. You rolled your eyes, but as he was still a step ahead of you that did little good for you.

“No, but thanks for the idea, why don’t we plan a big hero slumber party?" Stupid questions warrant stupid answers. " No, Short-Fuse, I just stopped by for breakfast, Eijiro makes unbeatable omelettes. Anyway, your new number one Sidekick wants a new name, aren’t you curious?” Decidedly ignoring the chuckle when you had said Number 1, you began.

“Lady Crane.” You paused, for dramatic effect, but your theatrical skill was completely lost on this audience.

“You are aware that your wings are dark, not white?”

“Fine, I got more. Black Swann-“

“Stupid.”

“Angel _a_ , like in _Angel_ -“

“Next.” He certainly enjoyed cutting down your suggestions a little too much.

“The Dark Angel-“

“How old are you, thirteen?!”

“Little Robin-“

“Seriously?

You threw up your hands in desperation. “Fine! What’s your idea then?!”

“Dunno. Featherface?” you laughed at his disinterested act after just having the first properly engaged conversation with you that lasted more than a few minutes. Of course he could not handle that.

“A royal thanks for the help, ‘Splody McBlastface.”

“It doesn’t really matter what you call yourself, does it? You already got a nickname, Birdy, and we both know my nicknames stick.” That was sadly true. When you had first met Bakugo in your first year he had not cared to remember your name and simply dubbed you Birdy – referring to how one of your classmates shot you down during the sports festival like a little bird. The nickname had stung, but worse was that it had spread like a wildfire. Most other students never bothered to actually learn your name after that… Kirishima had told you it was petty to complain that much, after all the name wasn’t really insulting – but he was one to talk, after all nobody called him by Bakugos stupid nickname. Maybe you should start…

“I don’t think I need to listen to you regarding hero names. After all-“

He raised a hand, a familiar signal and you immediately stopped the banter. Bakugo pulled out his vibrating phone and answered.

Not a minute later you were running to a nearby alley, where two police cars were headed right now. You cursed your injured wing once more, otherwise you would have been there moments after the call.

What you found upon your arrival took the breath out of you. A man was on his knees, retching, behind him three bodies, so badly burned they were hardly more than black charred figures. You felt your stomach revolt too, but kept it in. Firmly you helped the man up once his stomach was empty and lead him away from the dreadful sight. In the distance you heard the sirens closing in and the sound of explosions behind you told you that Bakugo had taken off to watch the area from above in hopes to find the villain who was responsible for this.

You just lead the man around a corner, blocking the entrance to the alley to save others from the dreadful sight and tried to calm the upset civilian. It was your job to guard the bodies and make sure the witness who found them stayed – though you were convinced he was not responsible, he might still have answers for you. You wished you and Bakugo could have spared him this gruesome discovery if you had just been faster with your patrol, or even stopped the whole event from happening…something was off here, such a heinous crime committed in broad daylight, close to a hero patrol route in the inner city – as if they had wanted you to find it, as if- _Oh god!_

“Wait for the police, they will be here in a minute.” Without another word you let your wings snap open, disregarding the strict instructions you had gotten not to fly for at least another two weeks. A powerful swing took you off the ground, then you had to struggle to keep balance. The weakened wing would not carry you as well as the other, making coordination hard – but you had bigger things to worry about now. Where was Bakugo? You tipped on your ear piece, a short beep announced that you were connected.

“Bakugo? Bakugo?” Goddammit, had you been too late? “Katsuki, please, answer me! It’s a trap, come back immediately, this is a set-up-“

“Birdy-“ his voice was pressed, almost a growl, you knew what this meant. “I’m a little busy right now!” you could hear he was enjoying himself, in the midst of battle, the same way he sounded at the Sports festivals when facing off against a powerful opponent in the finals-

“Goddamn it, Katsuki! Katsuki, tell me where to find you, have you requested backup-“

“Stay out of this, small-fry. You are in no state to fight and I won’t need help to **kick this bastard’s ass!** ” The last part was shouted. You had to hurry – there! A cloud of smoke and dust was rising over a nearby park. You tapped your com again, calling the agency. Address and Backup request, any agencies, just fast. Then you went into a sharp dive, gaining speed and, ready to swoop in –

Scar-face, the burned dark villain you had faced during the camp attack, you saw the blue flames snapping for your team-mate, there was no time to land, no time for smart manoeuvring. Like a human wrecking ball you crashed into the villain. Pain, dust and heat was all you knew of the world around for a moment. The first thing that shook you up was the noise, Bakugos explosions had not stopped – there must be more opponents.

“ **I told you not to come, idiot!** ”

Under you something was stirring. “You came with the wrong hero, darling. I thought I told you I wanted Takami.” Then you were pushed off, landing in the dirt, trying to get back to your senses. Your crash landing had knocked your fighting spirit right out of you, how could he be so unaffected by it? You struggled to get up, but only made it to your knees. A slender, patched hand closed around your chin, forcing you to look up. Devilish turquois eyes met yours, cold, unimpressed.

“Are you sure you wanna fight me again?” pity and sarcasm mixed in his voice, you were too confused, too hurt to answer, or to think. You were a hero, this was a villain. Your right hand instinctively found the base of your wing, your close combat weapon, but before you could pluck out any of your purple, narcotic plumage you heard a disapproving clacking of the tongue, followed by a kick that sent you helplessly on your back, driving knifes of pain up your injured wing when you landed on it.

“Such a noble, pretty little thing. Do you really want to die here so badly?” in his right hand a flame ignited, a dancing spectre, light blue as the sky. The sky…it was covered by thick smoke and clouds of dust right now. You would not die without seeing the sky, you swore yourself. Again you tried to get up, this time making it to your feet. A fighting stance, your left hand searching for a stun grenade on your gear belt –

“Don’t” Flames snapped towards your hand, pulling back when you raised your hands in shock.

“I’m a bad matchup for you, huh? What a shame, you and me, we would make a pretty great team though. I’m almost immune to your feathers, so no need to hold back, I’m ranged, you’re quick…And I worked with Hawks too, so I know the perks of someone like you on our side- until he betrayed me, that is. And not to forget you have just the connections I need –“

“You worked with Hawks?!”

But he ignored the question. “So why do you force me to hurt you, sweetheart? Don’t attack me and I won’t need to fight you –“

“You attacked those people, you set up a trap-“

“Not for you, stupid. And not for your insufferable friend over there. The real prey should be arriving in just about-“

WHAM. Something had plucked you from where you had been standing, lifting you out of the battle field fast enough to knock the breath out of your lungs.

“Missed me?”


	11. Chapter 11

For half a second you were speechless. Suddenly you were above the battlefield, back in the blue summer sky, looking down on clouds of dust illuminated by angry loud bursts of red and orange and looking up at -

A careless wide grin that cut right through you. He looked so genuine and happy to see you in that moment that your heart began to hurt. Then reality came crushing back over you.

“Bakugo is in there, you have to help him. But they are after you – Let me down, I have to fight –

“I saw enough of your fighting for today.” He shut you down. A familiar drag on the back of your shirt told you that one of his fierce feathers was dragging you off, evacuating you from the battle field like some civilian. And you would have let it happen, relieved that your Sensei had come and taken the burden of your shoulders – but you could not, not this time. Without further ado you pulled your knife from your belt – not a weapon you would have stood a chance with against the patched up villain but just what you needed to escape this rescue. Hawks had long left, downwards to where the sound of battle was coming from, while his feather was evacuating you further from the area. With a few quick cuts you ripped your hero suit, freeing yourself from Hawks feather, now falling towards the park that had turned into an arena. You had to get them out of here, both of them, because they both were the kind of idiots who would lose themselves in a fight, not caring whether they could win it. Do or die – and you would not let either of them die today.

You managed to land, somewhat, finally catching a glimpse of Bakugos enemy. A warp quirk – this would not be an easy battle. Bakugo was fast – no normal human could even have followed his motions – catapulting himself in the air, always a step ahead but just hardly – this would not do for long. Might be that speed wasn’t on your side anymore and that your secret weapon did not work on the other villain… but the warp gates motions told you that he was protecting something too and that meant… Yes. Jackpot. You plucked a hand full of feathers, letting the quills harden for a moment. Ready, aim, **shot**! The warp gate had paid you no attention before, taking you for a defeated, powerless foe – the first feather landed, right in the darkness under the metal collar, two more were deflected by the collar itself, the other two redirected, one at you, one into the dust where your teammate had vanished. You prayed Bakugo had been fast enough, prayed that something human had remained in this powerful foe to make him vulnerable…The feather that had been redirected at you stuck in the soft flesh between shoulder and chest, but you pulled it out right away, unaffected. The same could not be said for your opponent. He went down, the darkness that had threatened everything around now contained as a dark shade on the ground. You stuck another feather into him, for good measure, than you called out for Bakugo.

“Bakugo? Bakugo! Katsuki!” panic rising in you when you saw the man lying face down in the dirt. You ran closer, calling out for him once more. When you turned him and checked, the heartbeat and breath were easily detectable, but he was out. A tiny purple projectile had found its way into his leg.

Cursing you tried to pull him up, but the man seemed to weigh twice as much as you. _That’s what I get for intervening,_ you thought grimly. There was nothing to do but get him as far from the fight as you could, through the now calming dust you could see blue light, dancing, snapping, closing in.

“Goddamn it, Katsuki” you groaned, as you pulled the man up again, trying to spread out the weight, to lift with your legs. A few steps, then a few more. When would the damn backup arrive? Were they all on coffee break?! The flames had almost reached you. There was only one way – up. You dragged, you pulled- but the moment you moved your wings you would fan the flames and he was already slipping from your grip here on the ground.

“I’m sorry, Katsuki. This might get a bit rough!” you said to the sleeping man, then you spread your wings with a powerful movement, the heat around you became unbearable, you closed your arms and legs around your unconscious teammate, clambering onto him to not drop him into the roaring inferno underneath.

The villain…you could not let him die there, unconscious by your sneak attack… Soon the flames would reach the dark shadow on the ground. You loosened the grip around Bakugo with your left, the man threatened to slip for just a moment before you caught him with your legs – you would never again skip leg-day, you swore. You used a support-device Hawks had ordered for you, best described as a very expensive high tech magnetic rod and line that you usually used to extract small objects from above in an espionage setting – but right now it might be exactly what you needed. The device targeted the metallic collar and snapped it and the attached body of darkness away from the ocean of blue fire underneath. Once this was all over you would send Hatsume a thank you note.

The burden in your arms was becoming unbearable and you turned towards the city, away from the battlefield. Once more the world was turning, the rising heat from underneath making breathing almost impossible. Just a little longer – You dragged yourself through the air, just a little further- alarmed you noticed how much height you had lost without realizing.

Crashing down into the roof of a parked car, rolling of the edge, landing on the asphalt, Bakugo still entangled in your limbs, somewhere close by you had lost the villain. Exhausted you stayed where you had fallen, you did not have it in you to move anymore.

Steps.

“Here” hoarse from the smoke you had breathed in, weak - maybe they would not even hear you – but the steps stopped, then closing in.

“There you are.” _Not this voice, not him, not him_ –protectively you dragged yourself over Bakugos chest, protecting him with your body. It was all your fault. Somewhere not so far away you could hear a roaring inferno and knew Hawks would not come to your rescue this time, he would have his hands full evacuating the surrounding buildings.

“Thanks for saving my friend. I…lost control a bit. Would have been in real trouble if I accidentally cremated him.” You felt his eyes on you, but you would not open yours. You could not fight anymore. It was just impossible.

“The name’s Dabi. We’ll meet again.”

Through your closed lids you felt the red, welcoming warmth of the sun. Tears flowed silently down the side of your face, seeping into your hair around your temple. Bakugos breath went regular under your head. You both lived.


	12. Chapter 12

“You can’t be serious!”

“It is entirely normal to have a sidekick assist another agency if they could need their skills –“

“He is renting me out! Like some…-“ you weren’t really sure like what, but you what you knew was that this was not o.k. with you. Not a word after the villains attack and the next thing you found yourself sent to another agency. “I demand to talk to Bakugo about this!”

“The boss was sure you would say that. I am supposed to tell you ‘Shut your goddamn beak and do what I pay you for.’” The curse out of the mouth of his disinterested secretary actually made you chuckle.

“He insisted on the cursing?”

“I was quoting. Their agency is awaiting you, their only speed/mobility hero is currently in the hospital and your assistance will surely be appreciated.” Before you could answer Miss Takana had already hung up. A minute later you received a message with the address and no further information. You did not recognize the address. _Not Hawks then._ Relieved you got to getting ready.

Your morning became much better when you finally arrived at the agency you had been spontaneously ‘borrowed to' and discovered a very spiky head of hair talking to their secretary.

“Eijiro!”

“Birdy! Hey little one, welcome to the team! I asked Bakugo if he could do without you for a while, to be honest I already asked a while ago but he finally said yes.” His bright smile shrunk as he continued. “We had a pretty extreme villain fight just a few weeks ago. Speedjumper still has not recovered and he was the only one in our agency who was a speed or mobility type hero. Last week we faced a gang of thugs and one of them could levitate – we could just throw stuff at him and try to engage him into a fight until heroes from another agency showed up.” The memory had brought a grim look onto his face. “I’m glad to see you, shortstack, let me show you around and then I’ll introduce you to your partner.”

“My…-Oh.” Your excitement died down. “Aren’t you going to be my partner?”

Kirishima let out a bellowing laugh. “No need to look so disappointed. But my partner is healthy and we’re already a seasoned team of bros, there is no reason to shake up a working dynamic.”

The broad back already turned toward the elevators, passed them and led you to the stairs. “Never miss out on a possible workout.” You rolled your eyes, following him. On the seventh floor you were cursing your best friend and his fitness fad. There was not a drop of sweat visible on the broad neck and back.

When he led you into the lounge you were sure you looked flushed and heated, following Eijiros wide steps basically meant running up the stairs. There was only one other hero waiting in the lounge, apparently the other teams were already out.

“Birdy.” Messy indigo waves of hair peaked out above a thick book that was hiding his face. You wonder if when awaiting you he had greeted everyone who entered with your nickname to get it right without even looking up. The thought made you chuckle.

“Shinsou! I haven’t seen you since…” you allowed that sentence to fade out. _Since you sacrificed yourself against the League of villains to protect me and a student. Since you brainwashed me to leave you back there. And after that I haven’t heard you had been found, I searched for you. I thought you were dead._ You felt like an idiot. Kirishima had never mentioned they worked together, you could just have asked him whether Shinsou had been found. Your voice cooled down. He could have let you know that he survived.

“So we’ll be working together?”

Despite your disapproval not possibly having gone unnoticed, he answered in the same casual, bored tone that was his own.

“I sincerely hope you are usually quicker on the uptake. Let’s go.” His book landed on the desk with a loud thud, he was soon at the door and all you could really do was give your best friend a goodbye hug and hurry after your new teammate.

“Speedjumper, your teammate-?” you began, but he already impatiently interrupted you.

“In a coma.”

“Oh.” That would be the last words you exchanged over the course of the patrol. It was an uncomfortable, tense silence.

In the following days the two of you began to warm up to each other. To your relief he did not seem to remember your first real meeting, when he found you distressed laying on the forest ground and unknowingly saved you from Hawks rather aggressive attentions. He was direct, almost disturbingly confident and did not seem to hold back his opinions.

That growing comfort with each other however would soon be undercut. All morning you had the feeling that people were treating you weirdly – the baker had given you strange looks, when flying to the agency you noticed distinctly more shouting and pointing than usual and the receptionist at the agency quickly hid something under a stack of papers when you rushed in.

Shinsou however would not leave you wondering for much longer. “Congratulations.” He greeted you when you entered.

“It’s not my birthday-“ you said.

“You made the front page.” A bad feeling rose from your stomach to your chest. You plucked the magazine he was waving out of his fingers.

“I’m surprised you came to work today. Patrol won’t be fun.”

Wordlessly you stared at the picture. There you were, arms and one leg slung around an unconscious Bakugo, soot and grime covering your face that rested on his chest. What wasn’t covered was your torso, at least not by more than a badly burned bra. Cutting your hero suit free from Hawks feather and then fighting, flying and saving two people in its remnants had left you less than dressed. Blood rushed to your cheeks.

“Who cares about this? My suit got wrecked during a battle, I was doing my job-“

“Read.” Your eyes wandered to the headline.

‘Hawks darling sidekick with explosive new affair - **No. No no no** ” you covered your face with both hands. “ **I am so screwed.** I am so absolutely screwed. It was just a ripped costume –“

“They interviewed Hawks. Page 2.”

“And he denied anything and said I could work for whoever I want?”

“You should probably read it for yourself. Anyway, we gotta go. Time for me to get caught up in that smoking wreck of your public relations too I guess-“

“Oh really, you don’t wanna be fucking seen with me?! Thanks for the solidarity, you bastard!”

“Calm down, birdy. Learn to take a joke.”

“I have to learn to take a joke?!” you knew it wasn’t fair to shout at him right now, but you needed to shout at someone and Shinsou had certainly picked the wrong moment to poke you. Without rewarding your outbreak with an answer he got to his feet, the signal to begin the patrol.

However bad you had thought it might get, it was worse.

People booed and shouted, calling you names and cursing you. A construction worker flung half a hotdog that you luckily managed to dodge. Stoic you tried to ignore them, making a fuzz with all eyes on you would only get people to hate you more. After a day of patrol you returned to the agency, _done_ with the world.

You needed a break, to let out some steam. When the sun had withdrawn, hiding behind the horizon as the night sky crawled in to cover the world under its blue coat, you took to the air. As long as you could you flew right up, higher and higher until the world was hardly recognizable and beneath you was nothing more than an ocean of lights. For a moment you enjoyed the view, the solitude, the silence but it was impossible to find peace. The disgusted stares still seemed to follow you, even up here, alone above the world -

you pressed your wings to your sides, closing your eyes for just a second as you shot towards the ground like a bullet. The pressure of the air pressed all thoughts out of your mind. When you finally unfolded your wings to stop your free fall pain shot up your wing. You did not care, it just helped keep reality at bay a little longer. Changing direction you kept the speed, the world merely flashed by as you hunted the last rays of the sinking sun, followed them, almost ready to touch the horizon.

It was already night when you arrived at Bakugos agency.

_Bakugos perspective:_

“What are you doing here?” Bakugo sat on a machine in the gym, lifting weights. He didn’t know why that was all he said, Birdy had sustained serious injuries when she came to help him against those League of Villain bastards and he had been worried since then.

“Warm welcome, huh?” she was in her trainings clothes and they clung to her body in the most distracting way when she begun to stretch her muscles. A certain photograph flashed up in his mind and he looked away. _Explosive affair_ \- angry red stained his cheeks.

“ **If you hadn’t knocked me out I would have handled both of these bastards without problems.** ” Harsh and accusing the words rang through the great empty hall.

“Didn’t look like it. But you know I didn’t want to hit you, the Warpgate redirected my feather…” she had stopped her warm up, biting her lip uncomfortably. “Look I’m sorry-“

“Oh now you’re sorry?!” annoyed he dropped the weights. They hit the ground with a loud CLONG. “You didn’t trust me. I told you not to come-“

“It was a trap! Of course I had to-“

“I could have handled it. You weren’t even allowed to fly and-“ as usual when he was lacking for words he began to curse.

“Listen, I just wanted to help, I’m your Sidekick-“

“And what a fucking help you were! Knocking me out and having daddy Hawks save the day! Great fucking job!” She had jumped up and was almost at the door, he saw the anger in every motion. Anger was something Bakugo could understand.

“Oh yeah, run away, like you always do! Instead of staying to fight you can run right back to Hawks” he called after her. “Goddamn coward, -“ A sudden impact knocked the air out of him.

“You wanna a fight?” there was fire in her eyes as she stared down on him through the strands of hair that were falling wild into her face. For just a moment he was surprised, then he wasted no more time, kicking for her legs to make her fall. A swing of her wings and she took off before his legs met hers. A brutal punch just closely missed his face. He laughed while jumping back.

This was a language he spoke. This was what it had been about all along, he had been humiliated by being knocked out mid-battle by his own Sidekick and then have another hero swipe in and fight the Villain for him, their picture with him unconscious on the ground all over the media, calls and angry letters accusing him of stealing Hawks girlfriend- A downwards kick grazed his cheek and the adrenaline came rushing in. Explosions from his hands made him take off as well. 

“Oh, you’re gonna regret this, birdy” his voice was little more than a growl, deep and guttural and filled with a darkness he had to hold back as a hero. But that did not matter anymore right now.


	13. Chapter 13

_Your perspective:_

You had withdrawn a little after a violent counterattack had almost gotten you in the stomach. Bakugos threat was ringing in your ears. The blonde grinned a predatory grin while eyeing you as if he was about to tear you to shreds, bit by bit. And the anger in your veins froze, turning to cold fear.

 _Not **him**_ \- was all you could think. _I can’t fight **him**_. And he attacked. There was no thought of fighting back left in you, instead you dodged, the training hall offered enough space to escape, always an arms length ahead, just out of his reach. The sound of explosions behind you reminding you – you could not panic, you had to stay concentrated.

“Oh but it’s no fun if you keep running. I guess I’ll have to get you down from there!“ And half the hall was suddenly a violent burst of heat and light, the was pressure enough to throw you against the wall. Immediately he was there, kicking you down, four meters to the floor.

_The breath was knocked out of you. “You think you can beat me, yeah?!” Another punch in the stomach sent you to your knees._

_“I’m not scared of you!” you lied, but the words were more of a whimper than anything else. You tried to take off, but he was already in the air, waiting for you._

_The boys face was twisted into a mask of hatred and anger. “I’m gonna fucking kill you!”_

Your back hit the ground again, but you were not ready to give up yet. Not this time. Spinning quickly you slapped him across the face with your wing and let a kick follow. Then you took off once more.

_Under wild blonde hair were chrimson eyes, the blood lust written into them. He was only a year above you but it felt like fighting a real villain, you were terrified –_

_“Suddenly lost your tongue, huh?!”_

_You had. Your tongue and your **mind** when you had challenged him when his bullying had grown too much to bear._

_A brutal fist grabbed you by the collar, throwing you down to the ground._

_“Please-“ you weren’t even sure the word had come over your lips. The faces of the onlooking students who had come out of the cafeteria to watch showed curiosity and excitement. Some seemed to be shouting something but their words never reached you. His weight was pressing you into the dirty campus ground. And hand is raised threateningly small explosions in his palm, the other hand pressing your face into the mud._

_“Take it back. Say you’re sorry” Bakugos grim whisper in your ear. His breath is warm. Too close. Tears mix with the sweat from his palm on your face. The sweat of his explosi- Oh god._

_“Please don’t- “ you bring it out. One wrong move now and-_

There was no time for the past right now. You tried to shake them off but the pictures were alive into your memory. This was another fight, you told yourself. But the knot of panic in your stomach did not dissolve. Even with your speed there was no escaping Bakugo. His attacks were vicious, you were simply no match for him. You could have outflewn him, sure, but not indoors.

“Bakugo-“

“Coming, Birdy!” you fled from the next attack but he was tearing down the gym with the impact. There had been something in his voice…this was not your superior, the responsible and ambitious young hero. This was the proud, furious boy who had terrorized you two full years at U.A.

In the cloud of dust you had lost him out of sight- Falling down on you from above your opponent slammed you to the gym ground. His weight on your chest pressing you down.

The only sound is the heavy breathing that fills the room.

You look up. His victorious grin slowly relaxes. Dilated pupils shrink down and suddenly something like shame flashes up in his crimson eyes.

“Are you hurt?” it sounds a bit harsh, his eyes flutter up to the old scar on your wing.

“By you?” you huff at him, glad that there was no shiver in your voice. “You comfortable there?!” you asked pointedly. With a grin he got off of you, offering you a hand that you took gratefully.

“Birdy?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t ever use these poison feathers on me again.”

“I didn’t mean to-“

“Say it.”

“I won’t use them on you. So…that’s what the attitude was about, huh?”

_Bakugos perspective:_

She looked up at him with clear, observant eyes. Annoyed he grabbed a towel, rubbing his neck that was sweaty from the fight. This was getting far too sincere for his taste.

“You gotta work on your close combat skills.”

“And you gotta pay for a new pair of yoga pants.” With an exaggeratedly pained grimace she pointed at the burned rags that covered her legs. Not that the shirt looked much better. Under the grime he could see pale skin and – was that black lace? What kind of woman wore a lace bra to training?

Another annoyed sigh escaped him. Wordlessly he left for the shower. This had been fun, but the fact that he had lost control like this… He shouldn’t be around her for a while, she was pulling the trigger on him in a way that made him utterly uncomfortable.

“Hey” she had waited for him to finish showering.

“I know it’s awkward but we should probably talk about this...thing.”

“The wild affair we are supposedly having?”

She blushed at those words, speechless for a moment. Drops fell out of her wet curls, pattering onto the ground. She must have hurried in the locker room to still catch him.

“Well, yeah that. What…how are we going to deal with this? We could make a joined statement, explaining that we don’t…you know?” how helpless she looked. Just minutes earlier she had been a fierce opponent but the thought of people assuming she was dating Bakugo apparently terrified her more than facing him in battle.

“If you got such a big issue with it why don’t you make your statement yourself? Anyone who knows me already knows the truth.” He picked up his sports bag and got ready to leave. She stepped into his path, trying to stop him..

“But if its just me nobody will believe it, you have to –“

He brought his face dangerously close to hers. “I don’t _have_ to do anything, birdy. If you’ve got such a problem with the thought you are free to stay away. Or ask Hawks to take you back, I’m sure he’ll fix it all for you.”

She looked as if he had slapped her. The tears in her eyes drowned his anger, wordlessly he just stared, not knowing how to take back what he had said. Maybe if he apologized now he could make things right- a motion in the corner of his eye – he caught her wrist before her open hand had met his cheek. His regret was washed away.

“I told you, you gotta work on close combat.” He grinned. “So what, you’re gonna play your role of hurt virtue now? If it’s such an insult and I’m such a step down from Hawks that’s really not a problem I can fix for you. I can train you, I can work with you and I can be your punching bag after a rough day, but I won’t be the prestige boost you are used to. Sorry.” He let go of her wrist and left.


	14. Chapter 14

“Can you believe him?! That’s what he thought my problem was!”

“Uh huh.” Shinsous face was buried in his book as usual, _almost_ giving you the feeling he did not care much for your openness.

“As if it was about the prestige! I just don’t want to be assumed to be dating whoever I work for! _Especially_ if it’s Bakugo-“

“Sounds like he has a point when you phrase it like that. _Especially Bakugo_ …you hear it yourself, don’t you?” Eijiro couldn’t be serious about that! Furiously you jumped up, almost tumbling over the small table where the three of you were having your lunch.

“What? No that’s just- “ you were scrambling for words. “He always bullied me! He ruined my life at U.A. and he is-“ you felt as if there suddenly wasn’t enough oxygen in the room. “No! Not Bakugo! He doesn’t even look at me like that, I’m pretty sure he can’t stand me-“ you remembered his offer to look after your wing after Hawks attack. And the evening he had cooked for you and Kirishima when you had just moved into your new place. Hadn’t he been willing to hire you when nobody else would take that risk- “It’s- it’s not like that, really! I don’t even – I mean sure, he doesn’t look bad, but jesus-I can’t even imagine-“

“Do you think you’ll admit to your feeling for your boss in the next few minutes so I can finish my lunch in peace?” The purple haired hero didn’t look up from his book to see your reaction.

“You just have to calm things down a bit. Why don’t we meet up at a bar after work, I also invited a friend, she’s studying in the area. I think she should talk to some female heroes and it wouldn’t hurt you to forget about all this stuff for a while, talk about something else, there is a lot going on in the world…” Eijiro had been going on about some quirkless girl lately but you had forgotten most details. But why not, having a drink after work certainly wouldn’t hurt.

“Sure. Pick me up at seven?”

After the past days you looked forward to letting loose a bit. The last weeks were weighing heavy on you - when had your life become this complicated? You decided for a formfitting dress, black and only on a closer look would anyone notice the feathers that were embroidered all over, dark and almost blending into the darkness of the garment– Hawks had surprised you with this custom made masterpiece last Christmas. After all that had happened it was strangely comforting.

Since most heroes hoped to get to spend the holidays with the families they already hardly saw, Hawks and you had manned the agency by yourself. It had not been festive in the traditional sense but he had insisted you two wear a pair of cheap Santa hats a fan had sent in and together with the Christmas songs blasting over the radio it had been quite a mood. And at the end of the day you had found an amateurishly wrapped package in your locker.

You smiled sadly, brushing your fingers over the luxurious material. At least he could not take away those memories from you.

When you arrived at the bar Kirishima and Shinsou were already there. Kirishima was still instructing you on how to behave around his newest friend once she showed up, but you were only listening with one ear. Instead you took in the nervous simmering energy of the bar, even outdoors where you sat it was impossible to escape the chattering from all around - excited, summer-y, _alive_. Today you were just another young woman out with her friends. You shot a look at Shinsou, who sipped a Strawberry Margarita through a bright pink straw. Well, the word friend might be a little generous in this case, but you had to leave it to him, he had entertainment value.

“She wrote she’ll be late.” Kirishima said, still staring at his phone with furrowed brows.

“Just means I got you to myself a bit longer!” You giggled. You had followed Shinsous example and slurped up the last sips of your drink. You were not drunk – but the sudden freedom and normalcy of an evening in civil had gotten to your head.

“What about me?” the purple haired hero threw in, sarcastically undercutting your banter – but today, with your nose filled with the summer air and the sugary taste of your drink still on your tongue, it was hard to mind.

“You too of course.” You plucked the little pink paper umbrella out of his drink, cleaned the stick with your tongue in a quick gesture and set it into his wild indigo mane. He did not seem to mind. For once his book laid forgotten on the table.

“Gotta say I’m quite relieved the two of you are getting along!” Kirishima grinned over his mojito. “I’ve heard about yesterdays’ pharmacy robbery – you handled that neatly! And since you’re on board, Shinsou hasn’t gotten so much as a scratch, the spoilt bastard!” he laughed his unmistakable belly laugh ”Now I can admit it- I was a little worried about you working together-“

Shinsou huffed into his drink, just as you were beginning your joking rebuttal of his compliment – but you were interrupted by the sound of explosions behind you. Shinsous grin warned you that this wouldn’t be good news for you.

“May I ask what this is all about?!” the sharp tone made clear that your boss and actual teammate was less than thrilled about your relaxed evening out. The way he stared at Shinsou and his pretty headwear made you wonder how long he had been watching the three of you.

_Bakugos Perspective:_

Sometimes he was wondering if she enjoyed this goddamn media circus! Seething he had watched her flirt with that purple headed nobody. And his best friend, who knew damn well how he felt was just sitting idly by – so he had stepped in himself.

It wasn’t jealousy, he told himself, she was working at his agency, this was about his reputation too-

“I didn’t know Eijiro had invited you too –“ she said lamely, but the discomfort in her face just proved that she felt caught.

Furiously he pulled her up by the arm. “Do you have any idea what will be in the papers tomorrow if someone snaps a picture of you right now?!”

“Out with two heroes I work with? I’m sure it’s not going to look worse than your public tantrum now-“ His grip around her wrist tightened, but it was Shinsou who escalated things.

“I would tone down the violent outbursts, Explosion boy. The ladies _hate_ that-“ he said in a drawn out voice, giving Bakugo a daring glare. Unable to bear that shit-eating grin even a moment longer Bakugo let go of Birdie’s arm, instead grabbing the damned boy over the table by his collar.

“Listen, extra-“

“Really, Bakugo? How inventive. But- “now he almost whispered, mouthing the words so only the blonde could hear him. “ _if you touch me again you will suffer for it._ ”

Shinsou had freed himself from Bakugos grip just as explosions went off in his now empty hand. Birdy and Kirishima were both dragging him away from the purple haired boy now.

“Fuck-“ panic swung in Kirishimas voice. He let go of Bakugo and pointed over to a girl who stared at them from the other side of the street, a shocked face in the crowd. “Wait! It’s not- they really aren’t like that!” He made a step but the girl had already turned on her heel, hurrying up the street and vanishing around a corner.

The redhead turned to them with hanging shoulders. “I don’t think she’s gonna agree to come again, she already didn’t trust heroes and you three had to-“ Somehow the buffed hero managed to make the impression of a puppy that just got kicked.

“Oh who cares? If she doesn’t like heroes you should just get over-“ but Bakugo stopped himself when he saw his friends hardening quirk activate. Kirishima was surprisingly threatening when he wanted to be.

“I could catch up to her-“ Birdy suggested, already spreading her wings in a storm of dancing dark feathers.

“Sending my friends to hunt her down? Great fucking idea, why don’t I ask Shinsou to brainwash her too?! No, you guys did enough.”

“Hey, you act like it’s my fault that Bakugo-“ but the words seemed to get stuck in Birdies’ throat when she met Kirishimas glare.

“It _is_ , as much as his. You two are a bunch of immature, childish teenagers and if nobody gives you a kick in the right direction you won’t figure things out until someone gets hurt or one of you dies on a mission. Get your shit together or at least stop this constant provoking and fighting, you are heroes, not middle schoolers.” With a vicious look he turned to Shinsou. “And you. Whatever you said, keep your mouth shut next time, you know what a short fused dumbass this one can be-“

“Hey!” but Kirishimas look shut Bakugo right up. Not out of fear, in fact he would have loved a nice go at it, but the sincerity in his friends face told him that this was not a moment to test their friendship further.

“I’ll try to fix this now. I am so damn tired of this bullshit from you guys.” He grumbled and left. Quietly Birdy pulled her wallet out and crossed the terrace to pay for the group. Embarrassed Bakugo looked around. A few people were still staring. His outbreak certainly hadn’t helped to keep things private.


	15. Chapter 15

With a sigh you looked at the mountain of mail on your kitchen table. You would not deal with that today. Not only that most of it was hate mail – probably all of it, if you were honest – but on your way upstairs you had cut your finger on a lose razor blade between the envelopes. Despite disinfecting it right away you felt slightly concerned, you did not really want to know what else was on that blade – or the envelopes for that matter. How had all these people even found out where you lived? But in the end you still preferred the abuse via mail to what you were dealing with on patrol. While Bakugos backlash for the whole story of your supposed affair had been a few angry letters, they were still outnumbered by the amount of weirdos who tried to high-five him. You on the other hand… To your own embarrassment the memory of the last weeks abuse brought tears to your eyes. Of course you did not need to worry much about trolls posting all over the internet how they would find and hurt you – you were a hero after all. If one of them should ever try to turn that threat into a reality you would take your sweet time to show them a bit of what one learned in U.A. combat training.

But to suddenly be a social outcast… It was a lot.

Last week your baker had mumbled something that sounded suspiciously like ‘slut’ when you left the shop and your sweet elderly neighbour stopped greeting you. You had tried to tell yourself that it had nothing to do with this whole thing, but just two days later you had caught her hanging a cut out of the article on your door. Afterwards you had begun to leave your home through the window more often, that way you did not run into anyone.

Decidedly you turned your back on the mountain of mail, you would not let this bring you down. Luckily you had plans for tonight.

_What in the world am I doing here?_ You wondered once more when you looked around in the tidy living room.

“When did Kirishima say he would be here?”

“Twenty minutes ago.” Another sip from his water, but Bakugo did not look like he was enjoying himself. You could not help but think of what Kirishima had insinuated about the two of you when he had his outbreak.

“Maybe we should start cooking.” You offered, hoping that would make the awkward situation a little more bearable. Eijiro better had an excellent excuse for being late.

The grunt Bakugo gave could possibly have been interpreted as agreement, he got up and made his way towards the kitchen. In the door he stopped and stared grimly at you.

“What?” you looked up from your phones display where you were typing the sixth message at your best friend.

“Move your ass.”

“Me?” the confusion on your face made him grin. It was the dark kind, the exact expression he had when he told an intern to do another set of one hundred sit-ups.

“I can’t cook.” You explained. _He knows that!_

“About time you learn it then. Jesus, I can’t believe someone can be that dependent on others.”

“Hey!” but you got up, following him to the kitchen. “I don’t even know what to-“

“Cut the vegetables. I’ll take care of the meat.” He cut you short and shoved you towards knife and cutting board.

The silence was only interrupted when he complained about your technique or explained the next step. You had insisted on some music, to make things a little less weird and when you saw he was using sake for the meal you had decided to take a cup while cooking, to ease up the mood a bit.

“Those are still too big. Again.” He shoved the cutting board with the in your opinion meticulously sliced Lotus root back to you.

“Oh come on! You’re acting like it’s so important –“

“My kitchen, my rules! Invite me next time and we can eat it all as giant, half cooked chunks then.”

You stuck out your tongue at him -

That was when your phone beeped, interrupting your retort. Kirishima, finally.

“What’s he saying?”

“Got caught up helping a friend, something about those quirkless protests-“ you looked at Bakugos wide shoulders as he was dipping the lotus root slices in light tempura batter and dropped them into hot oil, seemingly completely focused. “He won’t make it, says he’s sorry.” Awkwardly you put your phone down. You were at Bakugos place, cooking together – alone. You remembered the recent front page and heat began rising to your cheeks. Bakugo did not turn around. Somehow you were almost grateful, talking to his back was a lot easier.

“Well, dinner is almost ready. His loss.”

“Should i…” you swallowed, suddenly very interested in your phone again. “Should I go? I have some leftovers at home and a file case I should really go over-“

“Don’t be ridiculous.” Finally he turned, crimson eyes nailing you down on the kitchen chair. There was a certain spark in the look he gave you. Bemusement. “You can’t still be _that_ terrified of me, Birdy.”

“Me?! Of you? Oh please, stop flattering yourself-“

“I know you are. When we’re alone.”

“There are enough rumours already, I just don’t think it’s smart to fuel that-“ you broke off under the weight of his glare.

He seemed in no way convinced, but turned back to the stove, not pushing further. That latter part was a pleasant surprise.

“It’s just…” you breathed in, then out low. “Well, you used to be a bit of a prick.” It was quite the understatement, but it was a step towards honesty.

“And you a spoiled arrogant bimbo, what’s your point?” he shot right back.

“A- **a what?!** ”

“Oh come on. Prancing around at U.A. like you’re too good for that place. Hawks little darling was above all the rest. Fucking full of yourself. You didn’t even talk to me-“

“Because I was _terrified_ of you!”

“So I was right!” Damn, he got you there. Provoking you like that -

“No, just back at school – I don’t know. Maybe. You were awful. Honestly. I had _nightmares_ of running into you…”

He looked genuinely shocked. Then he turned away, defensive. “Not my fault you’re such a coward.” He grumbled, but you saw that this revelation had wounded him. 

“How do you think others feel when you bully them like that?! You burned my hair once-“

“That was an accident!”

“Because you were pulling my braid and I tried to free myself and you got angry-“

“You insulted me!”

“You beat me up in front of half the school! You slammed me in the dirt and forced me to apologize for something and everyone was watching, you heard them laughing, -“

You had not noticed but your eyes were filled with tears and your voice heavy with accusation. You had dreamt of that fight again and again, the sniggering of the other students, as you were humiliated before them. You had known many had resented you for being Hawks favourite, but until that day you had no idea how bad things were.

Stubbornly he refused to turn around, instead staring down at the squash simmering in rice wine and soy sauce that suddenly seemed to need his intense attention.

“If you remember it so well, then you also remember _what_ I made you apologize for.”

“I had stood up to one of your mean comments-“

“I asked you out. And you answered you’d marry a villain before that ever happened. Then you called me a creepy bastard.” He recalled drily. “I’ll admit, that did not warrant my behaviour afterwards, but you will have to concede that you were kind of a bitch back in school. Certainly more of a bully yourself than you seem to remember today.”

You swallowed. “Of course I didn’t want to go out with you, you burned my hair just months before-“

“Yeah that. I told you it was an accident. Kirishima always teased you with those silly braids of yours, I just pulled a bit on it, you never minded him doing that… then you told me to keep my nasty hands off you-“

You blushed. You _had_ said that. But he also had no right to just touch you. And then his hand had exploded, burning off almost twenty centimetres of the mane you had been so proud off. You had hated him for it, quite frankly – but looking at it now it felt long back. An accident caused by a stupid high schooler with a crush -

“Why are we talking about old school stories anyway?”

“All I’m saying is that maybe you misjudged me. Ok, maybe not completely, but…I didn’t mean to...” he broke off, seemingly frustrated with himself “So, anyway you can stop thinking about what a monster I was in school and relax around me. We work together now. And it looks like we’ll see each other around.” There was still a bit of his usual grouchy attitude, telling others what to do, but besides that he seemed almost…cute.

He turned off the stove and began shuffling in his cabinets for plates. Maybe Bakugo had a point. Maybe not all your teenage grudges were still 100% valid. The person you had idolized back then had turned out to be to actual monster in your story…

“Sorry. For the… you know. I didn’t know how bad it was for you” he mumbled.

You did not let on whether you had heard him, knowing it wasn’t easy for him to apologize. Instead you began shuffling about the table, moving away cutting boards and refilling the sake cups.

Turning with a careful smile he presented two absurdly full trays of little bowls, platters and plates of dishes of different vegetables and meat and sauces decorated with artfully cut tomato roses and carrot cherry blossoms as garnish. The scent of crispy tempura and rice wine sauteed squash made your belly grumble. 

“Planned for the three of us” he shrugged, as you eyed your enormous portion in disbelief.


	16. Chapter 16

_Hawks perspective:_

The pleasantly warm summer night went unappreciated as he sat in his room up in the highest floor of his agency, all windows open in hopes of inviting in a fleeting breeze.

In the past weeks his search for the League had grown almost obsessive. And yet any lead they had turned up with nothing. A few blunders could have been explained but by now a suspicion had come sneaking in. They were being played – the League must have an informant in the pro circles in order to evade them this effectively.

He looked back at the files he had compiled. Photos, print outs from the security cameras, a whole stack on the few members whose past identities they had managed to uncover.

Dabi’s grin seemed to stare at him from the darkness outside the window. Always just out of reach.

 _Now it’s just you and me, old friend._ Hawks emptied his whisky in one sip. The sound of the glass meeting the table as he set it down almost startled him - what was wrong with him lately?

But he did not need an answer to that. Everyone knew what was up with him lately, his stupid media campaign had made sure of that. There were some regrets about his handling of the situation, to say the least. But it was too late to change that now. Instead he had painted himself as the horned lover, the left behind poor man, a joke. _Not you_ , jealousy was whispering into his ear, **_she_** _has made you that. And they all know of your shame now._ Impatiently he filled his glass again, despite knowing that this particular voice in his head was not only impossible to drown, it seemed to find new strength in his intoxication. But given the choice between jealousy and the gnawing loneliness of his evenings, the choice was obvious.

 _She would have been sleeping on the couch now. If things had gone different she would be laying on the couch, peacefully slumbering after insisting to help with the investigation after a long day. It would be too warm to bring her a blanket, maybe warm enough for her to have changed into an airy summer dress after work, but he could still come over and brush the hair out of that beloved little face._ He remembered the way she furrowed her brows when a strand of hair tickled her nose. _Maybe he would slip her feet out of her sandals, turning off the laptop with a pleased sigh, the kind that one made when deciding that there was more to life than just work…and pick up the girl to carry her to his room one floor down, careful not to wake her._

But things were not different and he was alone, with no excuse to stop working. He knew there would be no sleep waiting for him in the empty bed downstairs.

He tried focussing on the files again, Himiko Tooga, Jin Bubaigawara… but there was little new to discover in the files that he had read and reread so many times by now, he knew them by heart. He pulled up the reports on the last few incidents. There _must_ be something he was overlooking.

Something was wrong, somehow they had found their way into the pro ranks. But how? Infiltration was the obvious answer, though he could not exclude an unusual quirk that might do the trick just as well. However they did have two members specialized on changing into someone else…

Annoyed he raised his glass again, only to find it empty. This was pointless. Without new information all he could do was circle back to the same old suspicions. All he longed for was a bit of peace of mind – but he could just as well have been hoping for total enlightenment or a warpgate Sidekick. No, his mind had become his personal hell, with nothing but another obsession to distract him from his first one.

 _Of course, he could find a bit of peace…_ he shook his head. _No, not that._ _He would not give in to that._ Although it was probably late enough soon, she would be sleeping, her window opened wide, inviting in the night air and him _… No. It is wrong to even think about, villainous, he was not just some obsessed stalker, it would be torture, only reigniting his passion when he could indulge in his possessive desires, to make sure she was alone –_ _wrong. It was wrong._ Even though…the open windows seemed to tempt him, just as a light breeze of night air came in. _Nobody would know…_

With a sigh from the deepest depths of his soul he poured himself another drink, calling up a map of all places where the League had been seen.

He would give in to his demons, he knew that. But not tonight.

_Your perspective:_

Your earpiece buzzed. With surprise you picked it up, expecting a call to all heroes in the area. Instead it was _him_.

“Birdy? I could use some backup.” Bakugos voice ripped you out of your relaxed Saturday evening mood.

“Location always first, hot-shot.” you reminded him, before slipping out of your pjs and frantically pulling at your costumes zipper. You just couldn’t resist mocking him when you got the chance.

“Two streets down from your place. The park, you’ll see me–“

There was no time to wash out your hair mask, so you just pulled it into a bun and took off, leaving over your balcony, where you tried not to topple the little bonsai over that you had moved out there earlier to let him catch some fresh air and sunlight.

“You can’t be serious”

The gang he had been fighting laid stacked to a neat little pile when you landed. There was no way they had given him much trouble.

“What’s with your hair?” he stared curiously at your oily messy bun.

“Believe it or not, other people sometimes have time off work where they take care of their bodies. Ask me on Monday and I’ll explain the concept of free time and hygiene to you.”

He seemed not the least bit discouraged by your icy tone.

“So – where is your emergency?” you looked around, as if you expected him to have a gang of villains hidden in the bushes.

He scratched the back of his head, in a gesture of unconvincingly acted embarrassment. “Turns out they weren’t that much of a threat after all. Sorry”

You stared at him in disbelief.

“Well. Uhm.” He grinned at you. “The weird hair is pretty distracting, I gotta say.” You turned to leave. “No, wait! I’m sorry. I just – I mean, since I’m already in the area –“

You sighed. “You know, you can just _call_ me, like normal people. You wanna come up for a tea?”

“I’d love to”

For a moment you felt like starting another argument, just to wipe that satisfied grin from his face, but decided against it.

“So about these guys –“

“Leave them here.”

“No arrest?” You raised your eyebrow. There was not a hint of shame on his face.

“Well… This wasn’t _strictly_ considered work – but trust me, i watched these guys since a while, they deserve it.” He added when he saw your anger flare up again.

“Katsuki, you are _impossible_.”


	17. Chapter 17

The morning came sooner than expected, in form of a call from Miss Tanaka – you had not even known she worked this early. With a sigh you stared at the number for a moment, hoping this was not Katsukis idea of a prank. Yesterday he had been acting very strange. It did not look like he had really come with anything to say, rather just to hang out at your place. For a moment you wondered if he had been bored, or just needed a distraction – but after an hour where he had dissected your taste in music, lounged around on your couch, laughed after finding your pink cat pyjamas and pestered you for snacks through the bathroom door while you rinsed out your hair, you had put an end to it and set him out with the excuse that you had to get up early.

Not _this_ early though. With a sigh you answered the phone. The secretary managed to sound fully awake and professional at all times – sometimes you had the suspicion that she was actually a robot, how else could she work more hours than any other member of the agency?

“I am calling to inform you that you are transferring back to our agency, we expect you in three hours for a mission, the files are already sent to your work phone.” There was not a hint of sleepiness in her voice.

After signalling you had understood in what could hardly be considered human noises, you hung up and put an alarm for two hours before rolling around, already half asleep again.

The fight had been rough but all that was left to do now was taking care of the last opponent. You allowed yourself a brief moment of pride, before focussing at the task at hand. Under you Bakugo was evading attacks with cocky confidence.

“Leave him to me, Birdy!” of course, he was enjoying this. This was no time to roll your eyes, yet it was hard to resist the urge.

“Oh NOW you wanna do it alone, but yesterday you called me in over that gang of small fries!”

From above you watched their little dance, a cryogenic ice villain against the explosive hero.

“Maybe I just like having you around?” he offered. That actually made you laugh, while watching him evade another vicious attack.

Bakugo jumped in with wild determination. His hands let him melt and burn his way through the walls of ice hurled at him, in the noisiest way possible, cracking and crushing down cascades of ice – one time you swoop in to save him from an avalanche, dropping him right behind the villain. That forced the enemy to abandon the position he has been trying to fortify through this entire battle.

“Stop dilly-dallying down there! He sees your attacks coming, you won’t get to him like this!” you half shouted into your mic, trying to drown out the snowstorm around. The difference in temperature made the air in the area treacherous to fly.

“Oh you just wanna feel needed!”

Again you wanted to roll your eyes but instead you dodged an icicle long as your arm that the villain shot at you.

“Not cool” you muttered, trying to regain your balance.

But then he gave you the sign – you swooped in unseen, gathering speed and using the newly created snow landscape to your advantage, making sure to stay hidden in your approach, picking Bakugo up right before one of the enemy’s attacks would have hit. Behind the ice and snow bursting out where he stood just before it was easy to stay out of view, hidden behind one of the cold attacks that has turned the factory grounds you fight on into a frozen hell, before rising up fast into the sky until the two of you broke through the clouds of the winter storm that has gathered. Then, after avoiding another icicle lance, when you were far enough up you pressed Bakugo’s arm hard once and let go.

Immediately you ducked away – an explosion right where you had been a moment ago speeds his fall until he shoots towards his enemy like a bullet. The villain looked up, for a second you could swear you saw horror behind the iced sky goggles, he tried to shield himself with a layer of ice –

A storm of white and flying chunks of ice emerged from beneath as Bakugo smashed through the hastily built shield. Then an orange and red burst, steam rising –

When the cloud of snow and steam calmed you could see a blonde head from above. He was already cuffing the villain with a new pair of Hatsumes experimental quirk-repressing cuffs everyone’s been talking about at the agency.

Satisfied with your work you landed.

“Not bad for our first job since I’m back. Admit it, you love working with me!” knowing Bakugo wasn’t one to pat you on the shoulder after a job well done you had decided to take over the duty of praising yourself.

“Gotta say, you’re lucky to have me on the team, spiky head. Deep down you do like me around, I see it in that grin of yours!” you laughed, tiptoeing over a sharp edge of ice like a tightrope-walker, arms stretched out, wings flapping lazily to keep your balance.

He didn't answer at first, when he finally did it’s with a provocative grin. “Got a problem with it?” He stepped closer, in the red eyes you could see your reflection dark against the white world. There was something more -

You laughed, saying he better not let a reporter catch the two of you like that – he stepped even closer. For a moment you wondered how you looked right now, surely sweaty and exhausted, your usually so strict bun failed you at the end of the battle, surely you must look – lips met yours. The kiss is rough and warm, still carrying the fire of the battle. Together you lost balance, tumbling over the edge into the fresh snow. Your hands in his hair, on his neck, caressing away a lost drop of sweat, finding his shoulders and arms, while he pulled you in, against him, a hand on your neck drawing you in, a forceful tongue meeting yours, his chuckle when you bite his lower lip – Both of you lost yourself entirely, the adrenaline still pumping through your bodies. Hearts beating against each other, hurting, scratched up skin caressed, gripped, pulled closer, victorious, wild, unbridled, blind and deaf to the world around you-

Blue light flashed, even through your closed lids. Suddenly you noticed the unbearable noise of a siren right behind you. Quickly you struggled to push the hero off you, getting up and slapping the snow of your outfit, staying busy not to have to look at the newcomers.

The policemen tried to pretend they had not seen a thing as they picked up the cuffed and still unconscious villains. With snow powdered over his hero outfit and a few lost flakes in his hair Bakugo looked almost cute, his cheeks were flushed from the cold and his lips from the kiss. A warm arm still wrapped around your waist, he stared back at a curious young officer with what you could only describe as a smug grin. Unable to resist the temptation you picked up a handful of snow and shoved it in the back of his costume to hear Bakugo cuss loudly before coming after you with his hands full of icy white, that under no circumstances you wanted to get under your own uniform. Luckily with full hands there was no way he could come after you in the air– A snowball hit you right in the face, throwing you of balance. Down on the ground you could hear Bakugo laughing to himself.


	18. Chapter 18

_Bakugos perspective:_

She sat on the edge of the rooftop, bare legs dangling over the edge. Her slender figure stood sharp against the dawn, blacking out the rising sun. Wings relaxed and half open, her hair still tangled from their nightly activities, she looked more gorgeous to him than ever before. At night, on their mattress on the roof when she had been above him her wings had merged with the dark sky, spanning his whole world but right now, kissed by the colours of the waking sun, they revealed their true nature, onyx black feathers next to emerald green ones, rich midnight blue plumage behind aubergine coloured tips, a dark rainbow, or an oil spill. Her skin reflected the pink morning light, soft and sweet and inviting in her naked splendour.

He got up, found his pants and slipped into them, trying not to step into the leftovers of burned out candles.

His heart was beating out of his chest, for no apparent reason and he almost didn’t dare to disturb the image of peace she offered. At the sound of his steps she turned, a soft expression on her face. So far above the city there was nobody to see them, not up here and yet the sight her naked breast made him look around protectively.

“Dusk and dawn…they always make me thoughtful.”

He nodded. It was strangely difficult to talk to her – not because he was shy for an answer. He could have told her how beautiful she was, sitting there on the edge of the tower, the queen of his world, he could have asked her to tell him all she was thinking about. He could have told her what he thought. _I wish I could wake up to this view every day, for the rest of my life._

But that was not possible. Because they were keeping things casual. Not really, because he could see nothing casual about surprising her with a romantic hideout on the rooftop, full of thick red candles and lanterns where they would spend the night over the sheets, or about last week when she had surprised him with an undercover old school date – she had hidden her wings as best she could and they had been out in old fashioned pubs, playing pool, going to watch a black and white movie and eating the worst pizza in town – but it had become an unspoken rule between them that as long as neither of them admitted any feelings, as long as they pretended this was nothing more than a workplace affair – well, then they would not have to talk, or think, or face the world.

He sat down next to her, trying to keep his eyes on the city, but they were constantly wandering back to the naked girl next to him.

“Do you think our friends know? That we… you know?” she asked absent minded. “I had to excuse myself from Eijiros invitation again, I said I had already cooked and had work to do but I’m pretty sure he didn’t believe me.”

“He sent me a text saying ‘Good luck’ so I’m fairly sure he knows. I mean you and cooking, come on, how should he not have seen right through that lie?” She elbowed him in the side but he heard her chuckle.

“Talking about food, what’s your favourite?”

“Takoyaki topped with Mentaiko mayonnaise and fish flakes” she grinned, acknowledging his surprise at that very specific reply.

“Really, street food?” They shared a chuckle but somehow Bakugo felt strange. For the first time since they began their non-relationship he started to realize how little he knew about her. A name, a hero career, an almost empty apartment. Not a single friend from her time before U.A.

“What does your family think about us?” the question had just slipped out. He tried to act _casual_.

“Nothing, I don’t tell them about my personal life.” Her tone made quite clear that she did not want to follow up on that topic, but something drove him to dig deeper.

 _I want more_ , he wanted to say. _I want more than stolen kisses and sneaking away on our free days. I want to know you, want to wake up with you in my arms, I want to tell the world that it’s true, that you are mine._

“But they must have heard of that whole Hawks-story, we were on the front page.” He insisted, earning a scathing look.

“We don’t talk.”

Bakugos own mother had called him after work when that article broke, inquiring when she would meet that new girlfriend of his and sounding a bit too disappointed when he told her that had been a big misunderstanding. Mrs. Bakugo was not scared of scandal and had mocked him since his graduation for his apparent lack of a love life. In the end it had always boiled down to the same old argument, she wanted to see him happy and with a family, not only fighting his entire life. ‘I want grandkids one day!’ had been the sentence that ended a particularly tense family dinner and sent him fleeing his parent’s home. The thought that her family didn’t care at all was surprising. Thinking about it he could not remember ever having seen or even heard of them,– no waving goodbye at the entrance after a long weekend, no picking her up after exams, no flowers at her hospital bed after the villain attack on the training camp, except for the ones Kirishima had brought. He was pretty sure he would have noticed someone with giant wings around.

“Why do you suddenly care about my family?”

“Dunno, it’s just strange.”

She gave an agitated sigh, dangling her legs a little wilder over the edge, looking concentrated at a distant building. Her naked body was beginning to show goose bumps but she did not seem to notice.

“We don’t talk since my first year at U.A. My mom and me that is. Never knew my dad, some guy with big wings and an opiod problem one would assume-“ she noticed Bakugos confused look “-my mom’s quirk. Her kisses get you high. Can’t say she used it responsibly – she stopped that kind of stuff when she had me, getting a job as a waitress to get us through. She wasn’t home much though. Mainly notes on the fridge telling me to microwave something and not to stay out too late…” her eyes were searching the sky, her voice and words were harsh, maybe in order not to choke on them.

“Hawks found me when I was 14. I was skipping school and had some do-gooder cop after me who wanted to know who my parents were to bring me home –“ she laughed now. “Hawks said when he watched my spectacular escape he knew that I would make a badass hero. He asked my mom for permission to train me – she actually had the nerve to request money for it, but he just agreed and prepared me to get to U.A. When I was accepted and he stopped paying her after some time she threatened to cancel my enrolment. That’s the last time I talked to her. No idea what happened to her since.”

That was not what he had expected. Of course, someone with an opioid producing quirk might be tangled up in the darker fringes of society, but Birdy…she always looked so pure and proper, optimistic – when he had first met her he found her pretty entitled.

“I’m …I’m really sorry.”

She looked up at the sincerity in his voice. Something in her eyes gleamed bright, maybe it was just the sunrise-

“I don’t need your pity, Katsuki! I have a kickass life and I don’t need someone like you to look down on me. My family doesn’t define me, I’m just as much a hero as you, it’s not like everyone needs that whole family stuff, ok?!”

“Hmm. So…Hawks kinda was your family.” It was clear from how she had spoken. He saw the hurt in her eyes.

“Hm.” She rubbed her skin, seeming to finally feel the cold. Bakugo got up and brought her a blanket. To his surprise she began to talk again.

“He wasn’t like a dad or so, he’s not that much older than us… more like a really awesome cousin or so. He was the most amazing person in my eyes, taught me tricks and to fight and helped me prepare for the written entrance exam…I wasn’t a great student before, usually I wouldn’t go to school at all... I never knew what I could do with my quirk before. I had his recommendation for U.A. – it meant the world to me.”

Her voice was a bit pressed. Bakugo tried to put an arm around her but she shook it off. He realized how hard this falling out with Hawks really must have been.

“It’s ok, I made a bunch of friends at U.A. and your bullying certainly kept me occupied. I’m a hero now, it all worked out.” She looked endlessly lonely there on her spot.

Bakugo decided that today was as good a day to die as any and said what he thought.

“You miss him, don’t you?”

Silence.

_Your perspective:_

Saturday morning, 6a.m., U.A. Campus, 3 years ago.

_Hurried steps carry you down the steps of the entrance, 2b announces the writing on the building you just left. Your hair is braided and curled to a bun on your head and you are wearing training clothes. You flew to the running track, overflowing with anticipation and-_

_“There you are!” you had not even noticed his arrival, lately he had gotten into the habit of sneaking up on you. You spun around, greeted with a wide smile and soft eyes._

_“Keigo!” you rushed into his arms, almost toppling him over. The hero laughed, roughing up your hair._

_“I almost thought you wouldn’t come this month either, last month you only sent a note and I thought something might have happened and I –“ you stopped, not wanting to admit that you had cried your eyes out when you had only gotten a note from Aizawa, telling you that your mentor would not come. You had imagined him in a hospital, or dead, or captured by villains-_

_“Sorry, little one. I couldn’t come.” Keigo hardly spoke about his work with you, never explaining or justifying things. “Buuuuut I brought you this!” with a grin he pulled out a package. You hugged him again, putting it aside to unpack later when he was gone- you would not waste a precious second when he was here, your Saturday mornings were always over too quickly for your taste._

_“So, show me what you’ve learned!”_

_Hesitantly you got ready to demonstrate. Usually you would burn to show off a new ultimate move to him – but this time it was different. Midnight had pushed you to explore the possibilities your quirk offered and everyone had been quite impressed with the result, even Mr. Concrete whom you had accidentally knocked out with your new attack, but Keigo…Keigo would know what it was._

_You took off, spiralling higher, blocking out the sun, then took your wings close, like he had showed you, falling from the sky like a human bullet, catching yourself just above the ground to speed past the tree you had chosen as a target. Hawks admired your work. Three purple feathers stuck in the trunk, in a neat line._

_“They…they knock people out. We’ll go update my quirk registry next week, Miss Midnight was very excited.” You look down, then away, anywhere where you don’t need to meet the golden eyes._

_“I’m so proud of you! That is an amazing move, there are pros out there without such a knock out attack!” carefully you looked up to him._

_“But…Having an quirk that doses people with a drug-“_

_“Does not make you your mom.” He finished the sentence. “You can save lives with that, it’s great you inherited some of her powers too. There are no evil quirks. Only different ways to use them.”_

_He looked down at you with a disarmingly warm expression. Then his eyebrows knotted together. Putting a hand under your chin, he pulled it up to look at a nasty blue and green spot on your neck, just where someone would wrap their hands around it..._

_“You would tell me if someone hurt you, right?” you were drowning in those golden lakes, his concerned gaze freezing you in the spot. He was so beautiful._

_Blushing you looked down at your feet, a safe spot to observe. “Hmm” you lied. There was no way you would tell about the fight you lost against Bakugo, about his cruel comments and how those red eyes terrified you. If you could not even hold your own against a school bully, how would you ever face off against a villain? If Hawks knew he would never hire you, and- where would you go then? That question terrified you more than a hundred Bakugos could._

_“All good.” You lied._

_“Well” you heard he was not the least bit convinced. “Let’s start the training then.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to take just a second to thank all you amazing commenters, you can't imagine how encouraging it is to see there are real people invested in the story! You all are the best and push me to work and rework the chapters just because it's so much fun that i really wanna get it right :)


	19. Chapter 19

_Bakugos perspective:_

“Katsuki” the dangerously friendly tone in his mother’s voice was enough to put him on high alert.

“It’s not my fault I am late! Hero business!” he defended himself right away, but the mischievous grin told him that that was not it.

From the dining room he heard a familiar, loud voice.

“I thought this was a family dinner, mom.” He said lamely, but she was already leading him to the others. His father welcomed him with a nervous smile, Eijiro, who was loudly retelling a story from his agency, seemed a little too cheerful. Bakugos eyes fell onto the sake cups. _Oh no she didn’t._

“Eijiro is practically family, Katsuki! We already started, since you were so late. He had a lot to tell.” Katsuki groaned, a drunk Eijiro was an open book, a cheerful, noisy source of information about his private life. If his mother was willing to go to such lengths-

“ **You can’t just invite my friends and make them drunk to pry on my life-** “

“ **And you should not lie to your mother! Why are you hiding your girlfriend from us?! Are you embarrassed of your family?!** ”

“ **I am, you nosy old hag, but that’s not the reason! We aren’t really together-** “

“Eijiro said something different there-“

“ **Kirishima can shut his shitty mouth or I’m gonna do that for him!** ”

“Well, I think I should trust Eijiro on whether you two are together. I’m not entirely confident you would notice.”

“ **Hey!** ”

His mother gave him a threatening look.

“ ** _Katsuki, sit down!_** ”

He sat, grumbling into the food his father offered him.

“So, Eijiro, tell me about this girl my son is trying to hide from his poor mother.” She gave Kirishima an encouraging smile and set another full bowl before him. Bakugo gave him a warning look but Kirishima just shrugged, gave him a ‘sorry bro’ look and dug into his food.

“So…yeah, she works at his agency, though for a few weeks she filled in for someone at our agency, that was fun.” He gulped down another bite, helping himself to more meat. “Delicious, Mrs. Bakugo! Thanks for inviting me.”

“Tell me a little more” she continued and he happily obliged.

“I’m gonna kill you for this, shitty hair” Bakugo mouthed over the table when his mother was getting desert from the kitchen.

“Worth it” Kirishima grinned, his eyes lighting up when they fell onto the plates and bowls Mrs Bakugo was balancing on a tray. “Uhh, is that icecream?”

“So” his mom began “I thought it was time to do something special again, I know you are all so caught up in your hero life, I am sure it’s gonna be a welcome distraction. I was thinking about inviting for the summer solstice. Surely it will be fun and not asked too much to attend a celebration together. A good opportunity to bring that girlfriend of yours, Katsuki.”

Kirishima looked up from his almost empty bowl. “Oh, that won’t happen. No offense, Mrs Bakugo, but no ten horses could bring Birdy to a family celebration. In her graduation year my mom invited her for Christmas. The day after I passed on the invitation Birdy volunteered for a raid on a villain den and when I said she could come after she also signed up for night patrol.” He grinned. “Ask the girl to face Vicious Violet and Takomi the Tank without backup and she is in, but some grandma kisses and small talk get her running.”

Bakugo was almost sure he had noticed a satisfied grin on his mother’s face.

“I’m very hard to deny.” She said, ending the topic with that cryptic remark.

“That you are, Mrs Bakugo” Kirishima nodded, putting down his desert bowl. “May I have another?”

_Your perspective:_

There was no indication that anything was wrong when you entered. You put down your bag in the entrance, slipping out of your sandals and putting the key on its hook next to the door so you wouldn’t need to search for it. Going shopping had not become much more bearable yet and most things you ordered online, but Bakugo had told you he would be visiting his family tonight – and so was Kirishima apparently, so takeout had been unavoidable. Maybe you would enjoy a cosy evening, run a bath, paint your toenails over a sitcom, call Ibara - you had not talked to her lately and you knew she was yearning to hear what happened since you last met her. After the picture of Bakugo and you had made the rounds in the media she had sent you a number of excited texts that you had not answered yet, not with all that had been going on…

When you stepped into the living room you saw him. Casually looking through your bookshelf, waiting –

“Hey there, pretty bird.” You dropped everything, immediately sliding into a fighting stance. Your instinct told you to turn and run but if you turned this guy your back even for just a second you’d be roast –

“Calm down, we both know you can’t fight me in here.” Dabi gave you a rather smug grin. “Or anywhere, let’s be honest.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yandere Hawks is coming, but you'll have to be patient for a little longer. ;)


	20. Chapter 20

“Dabi. What do you want?” You made no move to relax, but he did not seem to mind. Instead he let himself fall onto your couch, raising a glass of your gin he had poured himself while waiting. Close up his scars weren’t any less disturbing, the man not any less threatening, but for the first time you wondered if there was more to him.

“I came to talk. Sit.” He offered you your own armchair, but you stayed exactly where you were. “Sit, this is _ridiculous_.”

Slowly you moved towards the armchair, deciding to lean against it, able to dodge if need be. He poured you a glass as well, offering it with a smooth gesture. You declined with a shake of the head, observing every movement, prepared for a surprise attack.

“Suit yourself” he said and poured the content of your glass into his before taking a sip. “Not bad.”

“Glad you like it.” You responded, just a hint of sarcasm, the rest all tension. “Why are you here?”

“Why so rushed? Come on, this is our chance to get to know each other, aren’t you even a little curious?” his words were honey, amusement, flirt, but in his eyes you could find nothing but dangerous blue fire. One wrong step and you would get burned.

“I know everything I need to know about you.” guarded you observed every motion, not the least interested to entertain his banter.

“Oh _do_ you?”

“You are a villain and I know where you currently are, that is the full extend of my interest in you.”

Another sip of your gin, before he responded, still playful. “But where is the scientific interest? Come on, it must be bugging you heroes, why we do what we do, what makes us tick, don’t you have any questions?”

“How do I get you out of my home?” you shot back, drily.

At that he laughed, stretching out, seemingly comfortable. Catlike he rested on your couch – for a moment you wondered if you would manage to feather him with your purples, a handful might do – as if he had read your mind a blue flame popped up in his hand, before he used it to light a cigarette. You huffed.

“Surely you won’t mind. So, you aren’t curious at all… What a shame. I however am quite…curious” he blew out a cloud of smoke, vaguely in your direction. “It seems my old friend Hawks is rather taken by you.”

“You read gossip magazines?” you raised an eyebrow. His answer was a laugh.

“A guilty pleasure.” You didn’t believe a word he said. “Of course I’ve considered killing you, a nice little pile of ash to send my regards…” he pulled on his cigarette again while you shifted uncomfortably. “But I can’t help but pity you, seeing what he’s put you through. Call it my soft heart.” There was nothing soft about this guy. “I found a solution I would find equally amusing, maybe even more fitting – Having you help me kill him. Wouldn’t that just tear the poor guy apart? His own sidekick, after all the love he held for you….” The turquoise eyes followed your every motion, catlike, ready, despite the show he made of how casual this all was.

“Never. That you would even think I could consider that – Such an idea can only come from the twisted mind of a villain.”

“Heroes, villains, what’s with the categories? Do you truly think that is how humans work? Is it really so different what we do? Fighting, both of us spend our life fighting, in the name of what we believe in - do you think your violence makes you heroic because you got a piece of paper allowing it? And that makes you good and me evil? You got a pretty good glimpse of the number two hero and his morals, I thought you were over that nonsense by now.”

“I won’t become a villain just to spite him. And I certainly won’t help you with anything.” You knew this was all a facade, Dabis mood might turn at any moment and the scars on your wing reminded you what that would mean. But there was no way you would help this man – this monster with anything.

“I admire your… _loyalty_ ” he said, stretching the word, humiliating you with its choice. “I wonder what Hawks has to do to you to make you see that this is your only option. That’s the problem with heroes, they just _don’t give up_ -“ with a relaxed gesture he finished the gin, before continuing. “Who needs to get hurt before you see that this is the only way to end it? Your little red haired hero buddy? Your boyfriend? Do you think they stand a chance against Hawks?”

“Hawks would never-“

“Hah. I don’t think you know him very well if you believe that.” He got up, slowly walking through your living room. At the sideboard he stopped, carefully lifting something. A black shirt, long enough for you to wear it as a dress if you wanted to… you had asked Katsuki to leave you something that smelled like him this morning and despite his utterly smug expression the hero had managed to keep back the comments that were surely at the tip of his tongue. Dabi put it down again, raising an eyebrow.

You felt your face twitching in rage. Who did this bastard think he was?! “Don’t touch that”

He let out a low, dark sound. Maybe it was meant to be a laugh. “Adorable.”

You tried to keep your anger in check, allowing emotions to cloud your judgement in a moment like this would put you at a serious disadvantage. The villain stepped in, crossing the room easily with two long strides. When a scarred hand reached for your face you swatted it away. But a heartbeat later he still held you by the chin, turning your face up to meet your eyes. Blue flames danced in around a black pupil, behind all the calculation and control you saw a darkness you wanted nothing to do with.

“You’ll come around.”

A thumb slid down your cheek and he let go – just in time for you to slam your forehead in the bastards face. You had expected him to stumble back but he caught himself almost immediately, gripping you by one arm and violently throwing you around, forcibly turning you so he held you by both hands behind your back before you had any chance to fight back. Your wings were caught between your arms, using them to free yourself would hurt yourself a lot more than him – he had not been lying about working with Hawks before, this grip was an ideal attack –

“Be grateful I got plans for you” he hissed in your ear. “Or you would be burning now”

By now you were sure. Dabi _needed_ you for his plan to work. Otherwise he would never have bothered trying to convince you, you would already be a charred corpse like the ones you had found before Bakugo had run right into his trap… somehow that realisation failed to make you feel any safer.

_Bakugos perspective:_

On his way back from his parent’s house he lost himself deep in thoughts.

When meeting her later he would make sure not to mention a word about the invitation. It was hard enough to move things along – not that he was clingy or anything – but a lot of the stuff she insisted on seemed rather childish. Though she had asked him to leave something of his there this morning - a small victory that still managed to put a smug grin on his face - things were moving painfully slowly. He had never imagined being the one pressing for commitment in a relationship...A few weeks ago when she had found his toothbrush and a fresh t-shirt in her home after he had left and it had taken an hour to calm her down. As if he was trying to move into that half empty place of hers – It wasn’t that comfortable there anyway, nothing compared to his cosy flat and proper kitchen, but she seemed more comfortable meeting at her own home. At least he had been allowed to stock up the kitchen, so they spent their evenings together there, cooking, talking, listening to strange bands they dug up for each other, training, quibbling, toppling each other over in a whirl of ash blonde hair and feathers…

A look on the digital clock of the screen that showed the news in the city centre at all times of day told him that it was probably too late for any of that. She would be up early, training with the other sidekicks.

When he arrived at her place the lights were already off. The window stood wide open – careless in his opinion, anyone could come in while she slept – he suppressed the anger flaring up as the option of that disgusting pervert creeping in there popped up in his mind– but he knew not to bring it up. A jealous outburst would achieve nothing but to ban him from her bed tonight…

He rang the doorbell. By the time her sleepy voice answered over the speaker he was impatiently tapping his foot against the step.

“Who’s there?”

“It’s me, babe. Sorry I took longer.”

A sleepy _hmmm_ , then the buzzing of the door opener.

It was hard to stay calm when he got to her door. She welcomed him– soft curls falling down her back, not the usual tight updo he knew from work, heavily lidded eyes, still half closed and matching the sleepy smile. Without warning he pulled her close, squeezing her slender frame against his chest and planting a soft kiss on her head.

The sweet scent of her shampoo tickled his nose and suddenly all the weight and worries of the day fell of his shoulders. For a moment he thought he caught a hint of cigarette smoke too, but that made no sense.

“Long day?” maybe it was just his imagination but it sounded like a hint of concern, the kind a girlfriend would voice…

He hummed an answer into Birdy’s hair, finally giving her free and allowing himself to be pulled inside the apartment. There would be a sweet ending to this evening at least.


	21. Chapter 21

Another Minute ticked past, slowly drowning you in anxiety. _Why would they have you waiting for so long? Why had you been asked here in the first place?_

Impatiently you tapped your nails on the side table, then on your plastic cup creating a clicking sound as if to speed up the endlessly slow ticking of the clock. The water was piss-warm, just as it had been when they had offered it to you. Maybe this was part of the psychological torture.

You got up, measuring the room with your steps. Eight steps long, six wide. Two identical rows of cheap black office chairs and one side table parting each row. That and the clock was all there was to discover. Without a purse or your hero tools you felt strangely naked, but the instructions had been clear.

For the hundredth time your mind went through the last few hours. The call, requesting your immediate presence at the police main quarters. Nobody had been willing to explain anything to you _. You had done nothing wrong, they must be aware how ridiculous the allegations against you were._ Tensely you forced yourself to sit down again. Someone might be watching you, just because you saw no camera did not mean there was none.

Panic would not help you in this situation. Breathe in – _You were innocent_. Breathe out – _this would turn out fine. You were a hero, you surely had nothing to fear. Nothing._

The door snapped open, allowing in an officer in a sharp cut grey suit. Career guy, if you judged him right. Not the type to divulge information. As if to affirm that opinion he wordlessly gestured you to follow. Down the corridor, your anxiety growing with every step.

“Will I be meeting the chief personally?” Surely he could tell you that much.

But the shadow in grey just strode faster, apparently unwilling to give you any information. You did not know the chief of police, the fact that he had ordered you to his office made you immensely uncomfortable. In the elevator the silence became almost unbearable. For a moment you considered humming, just to see how the grey suited phantom of the office would react to that. There was a dark spot on the floor, coffee maybe.

When the little button with the number nine lit up the doors finally slid open. The officer made no move to step out, but impatiently gestured for you to exit.

Scratchy grey carpeting swallowed the sound of your steps. For just a second you wondered if that was what happened to the boring grey suits of the higher ranking officers once they were worn out. You could not hold in a morbid, nervous giggle. At the end of the corridor waited a great pair of oaken doors. A buzzing sound rang through the empty corridor and they swung open.

No words would have done the decadence of the room– office was certainly the wrong word here – justice. The chief of police seemed to be a lover of the finer things in life.

Persian carpets were fighting for space and attention with Venetian antiques, Chinese vases had to share the spotlight with crystal ashtrays and an array of curiosities from all over the world. Despite each object having its charm the wild mix made the room appear overwhelming and strangely distasteful.

The only consistent theme seemed to be the shameless celebration of opulence and wealth. You looked down on your feet, trying to stop the feeling of your head spinning. Maybe you should have given the warm flat mineral water a chance. In the center of the room ruled an imposing desk, mahogany, European, and surely worth a small fortune – but empty.

The doors closed with a snapping sound but it was the sound of someone breathing in behind you that made you spin around.

“Keigo”

And there he sat in all his glory, the sunlight that flooded the room caught in his mane and had it outshining all the amassed gold around, he seemed entirely comfortable, as if there was nothing strange about the two of you meeting under these circumstances.

“It’s nice to see you do remember me after all. I’ll admit – you almost had me concerned.” His smile was cheeky, but that went only skin deep. _This was a trap_ – **_trap_** – the word hammered through your brain. You had been set up- Of course you had known this would happen, sooner or later, but against all reason you had been hoping that somehow your utter humiliation in the national media had been enough, that if you just never got caught alone, maybe he would grow bored or just never want to see your face again.

In the past days there had been a number of calls from a private number – but you had told yourself that one of your more dedicated haters must have gotten your phone number somehow.

Well in a way that was true at least – he certainly was showing the utmost dedication tearing down your life bit by bit.

You had not moved – frozen at the sound of his voice, staring straight past him at a massive painting as if he would just go away if you refused to look at him while the thoughts were running wild in your mind.

There was a rustling of feathers as he stepped out of the niche he had sat in. When you had crossed the room you had presumed it empty, too focused on what you expected, an old man behind a desk to scold you _– Oh god the police was in on this setup!_ A feeling as if you had suddenly fallen through an iced over lake overcame you, your chest constricting and dark spots obstructed your vision.

You heard him move through the room. That had always been his strategy, circling his prey, watching them exhaust themselves as they struggled to escape and then, the moment they made a mistake…- No, you had to pull yourself together, now!

“What are you doing here?” you asked. There were no stupid questions when one was trying to win time to think.

“It was about time we talked. So hard to reach lately – the fame must have gone to your head. Never answering my calls…”

“I was hoping you got the message. I want nothing to do with you.”

Most dramatically he grabbed his chest. “You wound me, darling” but the sarcasm dripping from each word told you something else. He began walking again, seemingly aimless, but you knew his way of circling others, toying with them. With a neutral expression he inspected the treasures around, lifting this one or that to turn it in his fingers before setting it back.

“Do you know why you are here?”

 _Because you love power games,_ you could have answered _. Because you wanted to show me that you will always win, that you hold all the cards, even the ones I don’t know, that there is no point in fighting because I am nothing compared to you_. But instead you shrugged, knowing it would drive him mad behind this superior façade. “You got into tacky interior design and wanted my opinion? I’d say go for it, it’s certainly a step up and you seriously need a hobby.”

He smiled thinly, continuing his rounds. “As your former mentor I see it as my duty to educate you fully. There was one lesson you never learned.” He was turning another shiny object between in his hands. “An important one. Your place. You might be a hero now, and like a small dog unaware of its size you pick fights you cannot win, only saved by your…charms from getting eaten up and spit out again. For now.”

He was still holding the object, you could see it now, a tiny bird figurine of glass and pearl with gilded details – kitschy maybe if not for its incredible mastery. Fingers caressed over a beak made of pearl. The way he held it in his fingers, turning it, a finger caressing over the smooth surface, made you immensely uncomfortable.

“But you were made. And as so often the force that created you-” the bird dropped – and for just a moment the shimmering figurine seemed so lifelike that you almost expected it to fly – but it hit the carpet, one of its fragile wings breaking off.

Somehow the image made you draw back, as if you had cut yourself on the sharp edge of its broken little shoulder.

Such a cheap intimidation attempt should not work, _would_ not work on you. But for a moment you still felt a sting where your wing had gotten injured months back.

“-can undo you at will.” The threat still hung in the air when you heard an unpleasant crunching sound. When he stepped forward there was little left of the masterful little bird, crushed under the sole of his shoe. For a second you wondered how his friend, the chief of police would feel about his treasures being destroyed to paint metaphorical threats, but then you swallowed, knowing your mind was just trying to calm itself by seeing the absurd in this situation. This was bad. Horribly, horribly bad.

“I will talk” he gestured towards a pair of armchairs opposing each other “And you will listen. Sit.”

“When you left I never believed this was more than a phase. She’ll be back, I thought. We had agreements and after all, I gave her everything – nobody would be this ungrateful, this mad – She knows where she belongs, this is a rebellious phase. I grew-“ he paused, choosing the word carefully “upset, I will admit. Your betrayal, your behaviour **_hurt_** me. I was angry, made mistakes - But by god, I would have forgiven you the moment you returned. Welcomed you with open arms – after all you belong with me. Everyone can see that – the entire world knows it. **_You_** know it. Deep down you do." His tone took on a conviction here, as if to respond to you arguing back, though you had not made a sound. "And I am willing to do whatever is necessary to remind you of my love. You say my love was too much – how can you love someone too much? All I did was adore you, protect you – and all I asked back, for giving you everything, everything someone could ask for, was for you to be by my side. Not to be any different, I was willing to wait as long as it took for things to get where they were supposed to be. But I could have been happy with what we had for a lifetime. All I needed was to see the adoration in your eyes – it would have been enough for me.”

Something brought you to speak, to appeal to him.

“This is not love, Keigo. It’s obsession, look at where we are, where we sit, how you ordered me here using your influence to corner and intimidate me- “

“I don’t think you left me much choice. To catch you alone nowadays… I had to send a little reminder of my love somehow, didn’t I? How else should I…” he left the sentence open ended but there was a little shiver in his voice, betraying his true intensity. “Look, darling, I think it’s time you swallow your pride and talk to me. I’m beginning to run out of patience and I don’t think either of us wants to find out what happens then-“

That broke your fear and all the feelings, all the rage that had built up in the past months erupted. “Are you kidding me?! You have blacklisted me, tried to intimidate me, sent your fans after me, dragged me through the press, today I found out that I cannot access my bank account and that my rent has not gone through because you had me **classified as a possible threat to public safety** and you are telling me _now_ , **_NOW_ **that you are losing patience?! **What else do you want to do, Keigo?!** You’ve thrown everything at me and yet I still stand –do you think I’m scared after all this?!” you had not imagined it to feel so good to finally stand up to him. This was it. You no longer had to stand for his abuse, not a second longer, he had given his all to destroy you and you were still standing. This man held no more power over you, whatever there once had been between the two of you, he had thoroughly poisoned it.

_Hawks perspective:_

She had gotten up, making her way towards the oaken doors. He had not ever thought it would come this far – he had been so sure that if he just had a chance to sit her down and talk, he could reach her. She had heard his words, even if he spared her the details of his heartbreak, of the endless sleepless nights, the madness she had pushed him into. But he would not – could not lose.

“Bakugo Katsuki died a heroic death in a collapsed burning building in battle with a gang of villains when his quirk caused a gas explosion that brought down most of the house, burying him.”

She had stopped dead in her tracks, but he continued with a calm, cold voice. She had driven him this far and he would not be the one to give in. The plan had formed in hateful, desperate moments but he had never expected to tell a living soul.

“They found his body in the rubble, but it was too late. A national tragedy, truly. Of course there was a parade, maybe a statue in his honour –“

“No-“ her voice was pressed.

“Horrible story, really. Nothing anyone could have done to prevent it.”

“You wouldn’t do this – You can’t” desperation was growing, but she still stood motionless, facing away from him, towards the door. “You- you wouldn’t dare-“ she finally tried, but there was no threat, only fear in her voice.

“Me? No, never. Didn’t you listen, I said a gang of villains. I would be shook by such an event, all that potential lost… No, I would be truly shook. Of course, after an appropriate amount of time it would only be right to look after his grief stricken girlfriend. The poor thing – she was so out of herself, telling mad stories, attacking the authorities, they had to put her in a…facility, in the end. For her own good, you know? But not for too long, I think I might even care for her myself. After all we have been pretty close before, who better to help her through her struggles?”

The girl still faced away, frozen. It began to annoy him.

“Noble, most would say. That I found it in my heart to forgive her past mistakes and care for her in her darkest hour. But that is what love means-It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, _always_ _perseveres_. Love never fails.” He laughed, a sharp, cruel sound even in his own ears “but it might be a little early to start quoting wedding vows, now.”

He kept his tone jovial, with the cheeky smile the photographers loved – that she loved once.

“Where were we? Oh right. Tragedy. I think you should sit down again. This conversation is not over.”


	22. Chapter 22

_Your perspective:_

You were slumped down on the couch, letting your head hang. “This- this is breaking me. He is ruining my fucking life and-“ you did not want to tell Bakugo what had happened between Hawks and you, not even that you met - he would never understand the danger, seeing it as just another challenge to beat.

“I can take care of him. Rid him of that fucking self-righteous grin. Just say a word-“

“Do that and we are done.” You saw hurt in Katsukis red eyes, but you had to draw a line here. “That would end my career. And I don’t need you to fight my battles. I’m a hero, remember?” you tried to soften the impact but it was too late. His walls were up. Yours were too. Maybe this was a stupid idea. Maybe you should have gone home. Things between Bakugo and you were so…new to you, for lack of a better word, you would not even have come here, but somehow you found yourself on his couch after your flight back from the police headquarters. All you wanted was your own bed - But something had driven you here, as if you owed Bakugo an explanation – or at least an ending.

“So, what has he been doing now? More interviews? Sent his army of fans to harass you further?”

You collected yourself before answering. In the end you decided to tell him what you had found out in the stack of letters you had neglected for too long. One of them had been a note from an officer you were friends with, who warned you that you had been mixed up with some villain names in a recent investigation and what that meant.

“He got my credit card blocked. Apparently the bank blocks your account if you are on the terror watch list.” You tried to hide your tired expression.

“On the-“ for once he was actually speechless.

“I’m getting it figured out, but my last rent already didn’t go through, I’m talking to my landlord now, hoping they won’t evict me. It’s gonna be fine, he just did it to mess with me and destroy me financially. If I could get my next salary in cash that would be a great help.” In your earlier talk Hawks had agreed that it was too early to switch back to his agency, it would be better to let the outrage cool down. But he had been fairly clear about seeing Bakugou outside of work. You had no idea what to say, what to do - but his threat was hammering in your head, an image of Bakugou's dead, injured body flashed up before your inner eye.

“I…I just can’t believe how far that fucker is willing to go. Please, let me just talk to-“ Bakugos voice broke through your horror.

“No.” You could not handle more today. Why could he not just accept your answer?! You supressed a shiver in your leg. Bakugo could not notice it, there was no way you could talk about this – you had to end this intimacy you had falsely gotten caught up in. _It had been irresponsible to begin with. Stupid, irresponsible, selfish to drag him down with you -_

“Then let me help! You could stay here and I can give you all the money you need. We’re often here anyway-“

“Sure. I don’t really need my own apartment. Or finances. Who needs independence when Katsuki can play the hero and save them?” Irony dripped from your voice, masking the panic you felt at his offer. _I can’t be around him anymore, I would never forgive myself if Hawks hurt him -_

“That’s not what I meant…” he looked away. But you had a lot more to say.

“Oh, why don’t we just move together while we’re at it? We already work together- I can introduce you to my mom, she can meet your parents, they can talk about how she had to give up dealing drugs when she accidentally got me. Maybe she’ll work it into her wedding speech, I heard being married really helps financially with those juicy tax benefits-“ all the helplessness poured out of you in petty, spiteful injuries - but why did they all have to corner you, why could nobody let you chose your own life-

“ **Oh shut the fuck up! How terrified of commitment can one person be?!** I just wanted to help you, stop being so fucking proud and let the people who care about you help! Nobody is trying to take away your independence-“

“Well except for the sociopathic pro hero who **is burning my life to the ground** because I rejected him?! But yeah, **I’m stubborn and paranoid** for not wanting to give someone else control over my life!”

“ **I’m not fucking Hawks!** Take out your anger on _him_ , not me, would you?!”

“Oh I don’t need anger management advice from **you** of all people, Katsuki!” You spread your wings, accidentally swishing the glasses from the table.

“Fucking seriously?!”

You turned to the window. It had been a mistake to come here. Somehow you felt your heart shatter all over, you had not even known that there had been enough intact pieces to break –but here you stood, in pieces once more -

_But what was one more heartbreak if it kept him safe?_

“Wait Birdy, don’t leave- If you leave now you don’t even need to come back! I will just go tear that bastard to pieces and you better don’t get under my eyes- **Wait** I said! **Wait!** ” He was out of himself, hurt and scared to lose you, it was all there in his tone, but he did not even manage to conjure up his usual fury. The Bakugo you knew from school would long ago have taken things into his own hands, told you to go die and kicked you out of his agency – he cared, more than you had expected he would. A hollow burning in your chest responded to these thoughts.

“Follow me and I **_will_** knock you out with my quirk” your tone was icy.

“You wouldn’t…” he gave you a look of disbelief.

“Don’t try me.” With a rustling of feathers you were gone.

It was much later when you fell onto another couch.

“You drank.” The disapproval in Kirishimas voice was obvious.

“You’re not my mother.” You shot back.

“And be thankful for that, if I had such a brat they would get a good spanking.” But instead he brought a glass of water and moved your legs to make space for him on his couch.

“Child abuse!” you complained, but allowed him to get you out of your sweater that was soaked from the rain and after him pressing again you even drank a few sips of water.

“So?” your best friend inquired tactfully.

“All men are pigs. I will sleep forever on your couch and die alone. Maybe I’ll get a few cats to keep me company.”

“I see. Hawks or Bakugo?”

“Both. I said _All Men_ , right?”

He plucked a stray green feather from his couch cushion. A deep sigh escaped your throat before you gave in and told him about the argument between you and Bakugo. But you changed the story about your meeting with Hawks, re-imagining it as the dramatic argument from the ex-lovers of your favourite chick flick – if he could call you on that one he would have a lot of explaining to do.

“And then I left him to his stupid shouting and flew a bit.” You ended your tale of the worst day in the history of mankind, only having kept most of the details and all of the reasons behind it to yourself.

“And got piss drunk.” He added, trying to keep you from falling off the couch.

“Well, I had to do _something_ ” you defended yourself.

“How about going back to your boyfriend to apologize instead? From what you told it sounds like he was just trying to help, sure he’s got a temper but it kinda sounds like you were in the wrong here.”

You gave him a disgruntled look. “You can’t be serious! He was in the wrong-“

“To try and help you?”

“No, to…you know.” Maybe without additional context the story didn’t make you look great. But telling Kirishima your reasoning was too big a risk. Surely he would try to interfere and get caught in the crossfire. “And he’s not my boyfriend!” you added as an afterthought.

“Oh still that nonsense? You guys should really just get your shit together and talk about your feelings, this is just childish!”

“Hey, how about you stay out of my business?!”

“Like you stay out of mine?! I don’t think there would be much of a friendship left then! Just two people living their life without much interest in the other. I don’t think you really cared about anything that is going on in my life in the past months.”

“That’s not true!” frantically you tried to remember anything he had told you lately. There was a girl- there was usually with Eijiro. But you just couldn’t remember. Embarrassed and disappointed in yourself you realized you had not been a great friend in the past months, there had been so much going on and somehow you had started to take Eijiros presence and constant support for granted without realizing that he had a life too that he might like to share with his best friend.

“I really care about the two of you and you know I usually keep my opinions to myself. But I’m starting to get tired of all this childish drama, the two of you are just standing in the way of your own happiness – life as a hero is hard enough, there are enough struggles, why make things harder on yourself?! Get your shit together, both of you. I’ll be here when you figured your crap out and are willing to act like an adult again.” You knew he had a point, some part of you even wanted to apologize for being so occupied with yourself that you had forgotten the one person who was always there, always by your side. Maybe another day you could have kept a calm mind. But between Keigo and Bakugo your self-control had been used up. Maybe you never had much to begin with.

“Oh forgive me if I don’t stay for your pity party! I’m afraid I’m too busy **getting my shit together** , but sure, next time when I need someone who turns on me when my life is breaking apart, I’ll give you a call!” Feathers rustling you found your way to his balcony. Dramatic, maybe, but you felt you had earned that right today.

Behind you Eijiro was shouting after you, he sounded hurt and almost desperate. “Stay, we should talk, you know I wanna be there, stay please, I'm sorry - Hey!" He was calling out after you. " **Very fucking grown up! Fine, leave through the window, it’s not like you are just proving the point I was making that neither of you can handle feelings and conflict like an adult-** “

But your best friends words were finally swallowed up by the night air underneath you. In your pocket you felt your phone vibrating. With one quick gesture you turned it off.

That night you felt lonelier than you had in years. Turning restlessly you tried to ban the memory of what happened from your mind, but the words kept creeping back. You got up, stumbling into the kitchen on cold feet. How could everything fall apart so quickly? Why did one man have the power to tear your life apart as he pleased?

You poured down a glass of water, hoping it would help the sickness you were feeling. For the first time you really wanted to hurt him – hit him, kick him, until this horrible helpless feeling was gone, until you could live in peace - What were you compared to Hawks? Hadn’t he shown you a hundred times that he was superior in every way, that you had no chance to ever beat him – or escape him?

Somehow a thought popped up, unasked, unwanted from the darkest depths of your mind… Dabi’s offer…you could always take it. Have your revenge. _-It was madness. Villainy._ Even he stood no chance against Hawks, you were sure – and why would he need your help? _No_. You shook your head, as if to shake off the thought. This was not you. If you weren’t drunk you would not even have considered it. You should just tell someone, tell Eijiro about the offer and end that possibility once and for all. Tomorrow, you would just tell him. Tomorrow.


	23. Chapter 23

_Hawks perspective:_

Almost a week had passed since the day of their fateful last meeting. Keigo Takami had been a lot of things in his life. A hero, first of all, a leader, warrior, soldier, a false villain and spy, he had been a student and a mentor, a friend and a lover, and as Endeavor had dubbed him so kindly ‘a pain in the ass’. And now apparently a monster. What was one more thing? And yet he could not have imagined ending up here. This weekend he would see her again, he had told her that they would be going out for a date – but it had seemed impossible to wait another second without seeing her. And there would be a difference between her guarded reserve and what he would find here… Still unsure that this was what he wanted to do he sat on the window pane. His mouth was a thin line, as he was still fighting himself. But he knew what side would win. He was here after all. What was one more step? He had crossed all the lines already.

 _That wasn’t me though, I was mad with rage, it was a mistake_ – but he knew he could not fool himself with that. A minute passed, then another, as he was sitting in the window, motionless. Then he slid inside, soundlessly moving through the room. He almost stepped on a carelessly dropped utility belt and avoided her hero costume laying on the floor as a dark puddle. She must have come home tired, from a long assignment, falling into bed completely powered out.

Another step, then he stood above the bed. _Just a moment of peace, let the world be like it is supposed to, for just one moment,_ he found himself almost begging, to what deity he did not know.

He breathed in deeply. The figure under the blanket was turned away from him and covered by the duvet. Only a messy head of hair peaked out, despite the warm summer night. With calm hands he softly, carefully pulled the blanket down, revealing naked shoulders. With a smooth gesture he brushed back her hair as he had done a thousand times before, back when the world was still alright, when her face had softened upon seeing him. The light curve of her neck, the residual moisture from her routine after work shower that had turned her usually so tidy hair into a wild mess of thick curls clinging to each other… A sigh escaped his constricted chest.

It hurt – much worse than he had ever imagined it might. For a moment he imagined how it would be to softly shake her shoulder, wake her and tell her how he felt, that he _knew_ they belonged together – she would understand, she had to, he loved her, how could she not see that he loved her? He would kiss her on the forehead and sit down on the bed with her and she would curl up with her head on his lap and let him brush over her hair, murmuring sweet promises as she fell back asleep – it almost hurt not to reach out. Activating his quirk he used his feathers to carefully shift and turn the sleeping body until she was facing him. Waiting – three seconds, four – then her face relaxed again and her breath continued just as regular. Still he waited another two minutes before slowly sitting down on the bed beside her.

The sweet lips parted, letting out a soft sigh. It took all the strength he could muster not to kiss her then and there. But that would break the moment, break this silent truce between them. Because once she woke…

Madness and jealousy had overcome him in the past and the fact that she had just ignored him – she had to have known what she was doing to him while she was parading her boy-toy around. Even now his fingers twitched at the thought of the humiliation but he knew it was unreasonable. The girl was young, antagonizing her the way he had over the last months had pushed her into the arms of that imbecile – Hawks should have anticipated it, of course he should have known it –

Keigo noticed that he was trembling with emotion –this would not do, he would wake his pretty bird if he went on like this – he rose, before looking around. It would be hard to find in this dark, but her sheets were white, he should try it there first… She had obviously gotten tidier, back when she had been living at the agency anyone entering her room had to proceed with caution – _there_. _Bingo_. He sat down on the ground next to the bed, looking at her face.

The curve of her brow, the dark line of fanned out lashes – his grip tightened around the object in his hand. He leaned in until his nose almost touched hers, felt the soft caress of her breath on his own lips – A little sting pricking through his skin and relief flooded his veins. He kept his eyes on her face, reaching out to carefully brush back a lost curl – finally united. When his hand opened in relaxation the feather fell out, dancing towards the ground, in the dark it was impossible to guess it’s colour but it measured not even half his little finger. So tiny, yet so powerful… Another sigh – he could not have told if it was his or hers – _were they really that separate after all?_ Her blessing was in his body, telling him that everything would be ok, connecting them in an indescribable way.

Unable to resist any longer he leaned forward, brushing his lips against hers, so soft, warm, inviting – then she stirred, lashes fluttering softly.


	24. Chapter 24

_Bakugos perspective:_

“And make sure to water it plenty!”

Annoyed Bakugo nodded, trying to navigate his mother in the direction of the front desk. _What had gotten into her to suddenly visit him just to bring a tiny tree for his office?_ He looked at the potted plant. Maybe Birdy could take care of it, he vaguely remembered seeing something like this at her home.

In the corridor she stopped again, pressing a kiss on his spiky blonde head. He endured it, even letting her go so far as to fuss with his hair. “You should come by, I can cut that hair for you”

“Mom, I can afford a hairdresser.”

He heard someone chuckle behind him, a light, melodic sound that still sent little shivers down his spine. _Oh no-_

“Oh hello, you must be Katsuki’s newest Sidekick! Thank you for taking care of him!” Mrs. Bakugo bowed politely, the image of a perfect mother but the amused glint in her eye as she inspected Birdy made him suspect this run in was anything but incidental.

“Oh-“ Birdy sounded completely stunned. “I-uhm, yes, sure, but there is little to do, your son is very-“ she stopped, as if she could not really think of anything he was.

“Temperamental, to be sure. I know he can be a piece of work, but it’s good to know loyal heroes by his side. If I’m not mistaken you saved him from a villain a little while ago?”

Bakugo made a noise as if he was choking on something, but his mother ignored him. Birdy blushed, fumbling at her wings, looking as if she would rather be _anywhere_ else right now.

“Oh that - no. I’m not sure I made the situation much better there. Bakugo usually doesn’t require any….saving.”

“Still, I am just so grateful. You should join us on the summer solstice celebrations, we’ll be having a great time, Eijiro will be there too and it’s all going to be very fun, I promise.”

“Oh i-“ she sent Bakugo a look that showed that _she_ very much required saving right now. “I’m sorry, I already have a –thing. Appointment. And I can’t come, I’ll be out of town-“

“Oh, no worries, its work related I assume? I’ll make sure Katsuki sends someone else.”

“No, i- I mean yes, but I still can’t come, I have nothing to wear – I –I’m already invited by a friend-“ Katsuki almost felt bad for the poor girl, desperately scrambling for a good excuse.

“Without something to wear?” Bakugos mom laughed. “Eijiro already told me you were scared to impose, so I will not accept any excuses here. I have an old Kimono, I will cut it up and fix it so your wings fit through! I’m looking forward to it!” She bowed politely, saying her goodbyes and leaving the two stunned heroes in the hallway.

“Your mom…she is… quite the character.”

“I live my life in fear of her visits. She is as fearsome as any villain and twice as cunning.” He responded grimly.

“So…what are we gonna do? After killing Kirishima I mean.”

“Nothing, there is no getting out of this. That woman sets up traps that would make most villains envious. Anyway, different topic, do you know how to take care of tiny trees?”

“You mean Bonsais I assume?” she grinned. “You can be kinda cute, you know?”

“You won’t be saying that when I kick your sweet little ass in training” he growled. In truth he was relieved. Lately she had grown distant, never agreeing to see him outside of work since their fight and keeping a professional distance between them whenever they met at the agency. Maybe his mom’s idea wasn’t too bad after all.

“There is something she isn’t telling me.” A violent punch sent his sandbag swinging.

“Uh-huh” Kirishima didn’t look up.

“And I’m pretty damn sure _you_ know what it is.”

The guilty look on the redheads face intensified, while he pretended to be focused on his workout. Bakugo knew he was right. “Me?” he did his best to look baffled.

“Yes, **you**. The two of you talk about everything.”

“I have a strict rule of not sticking my nose in other people’s business anymore. And you’re wrong there, I know nothing. We’ve hardly talked since-“ Kirishima stopped, realizing that this was not exactly how keeping out of people’s business looked. “-nothing. Hey, maybe I should get going-“

“Listen, this isn’t about me. She isn’t herself…I worry. So…” now the blonde grinned a familiar grin “I can beat the truth out of you and I am more than willing to, but if you really care about either of us you’re gonna tell me all you know and better hope I’ll go easy on you for keeping secrets from me.”

There was a moment of tension, then Kirishima gave a laugh.

“That’s the Bakugo I know.” The redhead grinned, shaking his head before putting down his weights and wiping the sweat of his neck with a towel. “We argued.” He began, his voice grieved at the recollection. “The night the two of you argued, she was very much besides herself, I might have said some rather insensitive stuff about how you two are immature children and can’t get your shit together-“

“Yeah yeah, and then?”

“She left. We haven’t talked since. I tried to call a few times but she won’t pick up. I get it, I said some rough stuff but it’s not like her not to talk to me at all… “

“Hm. Same story here. I have no idea what happened, suddenly we argued and I didn’t even mean to – I just wanted to…” The blonde stopped, embarrassed, sitting back down on his bench.

“It’s gonna get better, dude” his best friend offered. “Just a rough fight. She’s under a lot of pressure – you both, and being a hero is no piece of cake either. I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”

Bakugou nodded slowly, not really willing to offer much more of a response, but Kirishimas compassion had calmed him a little, for the moment. They commenced their workout, allowing a comfortable silence.

“So, what’s happening in your life? Red Riot and his exemplary work with those protests is all I hear about in my briefings lately. Never thought you’d be so political.” He tried to change the subject and the other hero took this new topic up with a sheepish grin.

“Didn’t expect it either, I’ll admit, but I got caught up with this girl...not the moment to tell much about it, but when things look a bit friendlier we should meet up, I wanna know what you think-“ and so he went on happily, not suspecting that his best friend was a little less attentive than he should be, still worrying about the one subject that kept him busy at all times lately.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a bit of a calm one, but i hope that's not such a bad thing :) I read all your awesome comments (i love seeing how invested some of you are, it gets me so excited about the story and is just super motivating) and i'll admit I was quite excited to have cracked 10000 clicks on this story today - it's just incredible, you guys are the best! So i couldn't help but throw this one in out of my usual upload schedule :D No self-control here, but what to do?


	25. Chapter 25

_Your perspective:_

The doorbell rang. Opening a minute later you stared down at the dark, empty corridor. Windowless as it was, cold air awaited you despite the summer heat finding its way everywhere else. Behind you you heard a cheeky laugh. Of course he had to fool around and surprise you by entering through the window-

“Hey-“ you were about to turn around when you felt strong arms wrapping around you from behind. “Keigo” for another second he kept you pressed against his warm chest, then you were free again.

When you could finally turn the sight that welcomed you was so familiar it almost hurt. Soft golden curls falling around his face, a mischievous grin, the stubble on his cheeks –

“You better get changed. We got a whole lot of plans for today!” He threw you a bag pack just like the one he was wearing himself. “And pick some heavy shoes. I’ll wait here.” Before you left to change in your bedroom you caught a glimpse of him inspecting your apartment. When you returned dressed in what he had brought for you, you caught him curiously smelling your spices. A violent sneeze followed. In the past you might have mocked him for sticking his nose into the cayenne pepper, but not today.

“You learned to cook? I remember you weren’t able to heat up a can without making it inedible.” You didn’t answer. With Bakugou’s help you had become an almost tolerable amateur chef – but you certainly wouldn’t be telling _him_ that.

Patiently he watched you water your bonsai – Keigo had demanded the entire weekend from you, refusing to tell you anything about his plans. ‘A surprise’ was all you had gotten out of him. It wasn’t as if you could refuse, but he seemed to like giving things the appearance of continuing your past closeness, as if he had not threatened you into obedience. When you looked at him right now, his nose still reddened from exploring your spice shelf, a sunny smile on his lips as he watched you with infinite good will in his eyes, it was almost hard to believe how this meeting had come to be. You left through the door, to lock it properly and met your little old neighbour in the corridor, who gave Keigo a wide smile and you a much less dirty look than usually. In front of the building Keigo took the liberty of fastening the straps of your bag pack, pulled out two pairs of old-timey looking flight goggles and snapped on one. They were fitting well and after a moment of preparation you took off together, the combined beating of your wings making the bushes and trees around shiver.

It was a mild summer day and from Keigo’s relaxed speed you could discern that this would be a long flight. After a while you let your eyes wander, allowing yourself to enjoy the view – a city park under you, children playing in the fountains, their laughter ringing up to you. Two were pointing up at you, one slipping in their excitement and landing on their butt in the water. The crying soon turned to laughter when Hawks flew a hoop and pretended to fall, just to catch himself. But already you had left the park behind you, now crossing the outer skirts of the city, watching people in their gardens. And soon the first lonely roads and fields welcomed you.

The flight was surprisingly pleasant and until the first break at noon you were not expected to speak at all. Maybe giving you time to think, to be around each other again without asking anything of you besides your company was an offer of peace, maybe it was just what he was comfortable with – you did not know. Nor should you care. Your opinion of him would not change because he managed to be tolerable for a day. The break was still welcome, half an hour to rest your wings, hydrate and gather strength for the way before you. At first you were decided not to talk, but Keigo gave you little time to stretch things into an uncomfortable silence.

“I used to make long camping trips with my family when I was little, mainly with my dad – it’s been an eternity since I last had the time though. Always planned to make one with you, but we were so busy between work and training…” there was a hint of melancholy in his voice. Right now he stood with his back to you, enjoying the quiet area. You had sat down in the shadow of a large tree that resided over fields on a lonely hill.

“But I thought you would like it. The bustle of the city was always more my taste then yours, I remember how you tried to get any night job there was… you said you liked working with the stars, you felt watched over. I still remember that.” The infliction on the end was softer, recalling your silly banter from your first internship with an accuracy and fondness you never expected. For a moment you wanted to answer, just to say something, but instead you took another sip of water.

“You’ll like it, I’m sure.” He promised, finally putting his bottle back and picking up his bag pack again. “Ready if you are.”

The next few hours passed like that, flying until Hawks signalled a break and then more flying. Your mind had found peace, not what you had expected from today, but the hours of silent flight over ever-changing landscapes left you little other choice.

Soon you saw what your destination was: in the distance you could make out a dark outline against the sky. Not a mountain, as you knew, despite its snow covered peak, but a volcano. Mount Fuji welcomed you.

“We could have taken a car! It would have been much faster and more convenient!” you called out before realising that you had broken your sworn silence.

“Yes but then we wouldn’t have earned the view! And I know you never make the effort of distance flights on your own! It is good training.” He was right there, both of you could comfortably outfly a car – for about ten minutes, at least in your case. You were a sprinter, not made for distances – and why should you, there were trains and cars and planes for that. But Keigo had always insisted that it was important to train your endurance and strength – and considering how he still outclassed you as a hero you had begun to suspect that he might have a point.

A small fire was burning in the middle of your camp. The tent was built up and in the fresh night air and lower temperature on the mountain you sat with your lower half covered by a sleeping bag. Keigo was preparing dinner, his expression quite satisfied.

“What do you think?” He had not chosen badly, you could not deny that. The first shy stars were peeking out above you in the darkening sky, down the slope of the mountain you could see them reflected in a great body of water you had crossed earlier. Upon reaching Mount Fuji Keigo had demanded you use a track, climbing and walking like everyone else would – It had been strange. You did not remember the last time you had really looked around yourself, not in order to inspect the terrain for a fight, for its advantages or threats, just because you were there, a civilian, just a human enjoying nature.

“I know you like it. I don’t think I’ve seen you like this in a long time.” He put another stick on the fire. Both of you watched in silence as it slowly caught flame. Soon the food was done and Keigo filled it into a pair of bowls. A warming, nutritious soup, just the right thing after such an exertion.

After you were both finished he sat down next to you. “You hardly spoke to me today.” He sighed. “I know, you don’t like me very much right now. And you are not entirely wrong. Things should never have come as they did. But I want to repair this. And I thought this would be a good place to start.” He waited a moment, giving you time to answer, then he continued. “Did you know there are a lot of legends about this place?” Quietly you stared at the fire. He looked a little saddened, but then spread one wing around you. It was a familiar gesture, the feathers tickling your skin like they had a thousand times before. “I’ll tell you one, then we can go to bed.”

It was Sunday evening by the time you returned home. Hawks brought you to your door, fuzzing your hair affectionately and pressing a kiss on your forehead.

“See you next weekend, little bird.” His voice was heavier than before, ripe with feeling, though you were not sure which one. “Take care.” He added. You nodded in response. A surprised, grateful smile flashed up, then he gave you a nervous waving gesture and with a rustling of red feathers he was gone.

Of all the things you had expected of this weekend, this had not been one of them.


	26. Chapter 26

_Your perspective:_

You had no idea what had woke you up at this time of night. A dream still remained in the back of your mind before disappearing to wherever forgotten dreams went. For just a moment you had a feeling that you were not alone –but the room was empty. Next to you on the floor you could make out one of your little purple feathers in the moonlight. You turned to your other side, cursing the humidity. A familiar scent hung in the air, making the little hairs on your neck rise – this was madness. Just a remainder of your dream. You closed your eyes again and tried to fall back asleep. But somehow you could not shake off this strange feeling.

You reached for your phone on the nightstand. No new messages. So Bakugo was still too proud to write. Maybe it was good this way. Neither of you had addressed the tension between you since the argument, neither wanting to give in… _You should be happy about that,_ you told yourself _. It’s the only way to keep him safe._

Dark rings had appeared under his eyes lately and you suspected that he spent most nights awake, just like you – that was why you had not been to upset that your last mission had turned into a longer surveillance job. At least that way you would be tired enough to sleep when you got home. Until now that was.

You wondered what he was doing right now, if he was turning from one side to the other too, wondering what had gone wrong between the two of you.

Finally it was too much to bear. Without another thought of the consequences you began to type. _Nobody would have to know. What was one night?_

 **Birdy 3:12** Can’t sleep

 **Katsuki 3:14** You woke me up.

_What a liar._ You knew well that there was no waking him up so easily.

 **Birdy 3:14** Come over?

 **Katsuki 3:15** Omw

Well, you had really tried to stay strong. This didn't mean anything. It had been just such a lonely time, keeping your distance to everyone around... The time spent with Hawks had eaten up your last reserves of strength and the months of humiliation and increasing isolation came crushing down on you. You were only human too and you were left feeling exhausted and alone - you could not tell Bakugou what had happened that had caused you to stay away from him, you could not stand up to your monster either, you were damned to bear this and you would, had decided that you would bear it... All you wanted was someone to lean against, another warm being next to you to get you through the night. Humans slept better together, simple as that. Nobody would know.

By the time Bakugo knocked on your door you had almost managed to convince yourself that this was entirely harmless.

_You look up, a bright angel stares down from above you, his red wings spread as if to embrace you. The smile on his face is the one you love so much – the one that always made you believe that there was nothing in the world that could scare him, nobody who could reach him, that he was above this all, never a worry on his mind - his hands caresses down your body, while covering it in kisses, playfully holding both your wrists in one of his hands before he finally lets go and allows you to bury your fingers in his blonde mane as he lowers himself until he spreads your legs. A warm mouth touches you, kissing up your thighs before finally meeting you on your most sensitive, most private. A moan escapes your throat, and your eyes close in enjoyment as he causes you the purest ecstasy. Your eyes flutter open to find your lover - his mane a wild tangle of sunlight, spun gold, an angelic face – but his lips part to show a row of sharp teeth, lowering onto your skin, digging into it, as if to devour you. He looks up at you, his mouth seeping blood, but his eyes are pools of amber, as beautiful as he is deadly._

_Panicked you try to fight of the beast. When you look around you find yourself in an abandoned factory. Hands press down on your throat, no way to breathe – you want to scream but no sound escapes. The dripping red lips form into a sad smile._

_“You left me no choice…But now we are finally together“ and the creature devours you.  
_

Your eyes snapped open. Sweat covered your skin, the sheet under you damp from cold sweat. With a shaking hand you moved to brush a strand of hair out of your face. It was only a dream. Next to you Bakugo still slumbered peacefully. Nothing but a bad dream. This never happened, you tried to calm yourself. It never happened. But how far was it from the truth - were you not in the process of having your life, yourself devoured?

With a hectic gesture you got up, stumbling at first before you hurried to the bathroom. For a moment you thought you were going to be sick, but instead you just stood there, staring at your reflection. The girl in the mirror had shock wide eyes, her hair wild from a restless night. You tried to give her an encouraging smile. It ended up looking tired, but you felt a little better. Still uncomfortable in your own body you stepped into the shower to wash off all reminders of the night.

Someone was knocking on the bathroom door and for a second you almost fell in shock, before realizing that it surely was Katsuki, whom your strange behaviour must have woken.

“You ok in there?”

It took a moment before you were sure that your voice wouldn’t betray you. “Yes, I’m ok”

“Do you regret asking me over? Should I leave?”

That offer was all the reassurance you needed. “No, please stay! How am I supposed to manage making breakfast without you?” you laughed.

“I knew you needed me” the door was pushed open, you heard his pants, pockets filled with phone and wallet drop on the tiles. You tried not to blush at the image building in your head. _Damn_. You bit your lip. Then the shower curtain shifted. The view was nothing new and yet he managed to take your breath away. You tried not to stare, he was certainly aware enough of his good looks, no reason to flatter his ego any further – but from his smile you knew how well aware he was of what he was doing to you.

“Hope you don’t mind the company. I missed you.” There was no time to consider the softer register of his voice in that last sentence, the hero was stepping into your shower already, warm hands finding your body, welcoming it back, pressing you against his chest while the warm water continued to rain down on the two of you.

Maybe this morning wouldn’t be all bad.

A moments distraction had him catch you with a hit in the stomach – the pain almost sent you to your knees. You bit your tongue, keeping in a curse as you avoided the next attack. Close combat never has been your strength and you knew you had a lot to learn, but that did not excuse Keigo mixing real attacks into the training. If that was his idea of motivating you, he was wrong.

Angrily you tried to land a counter attack but he caught your arm, bending it back and forcing you to follow the motion. You triedgetting rid of him by hitting him with your wing but he met it with his own and bent your arm further, you were now forced with your back to him, bent forward in pain – With a quick gesture you managed to free yourself, smoothly sliding out of reach, rubbing your wrist. A brief look proved your suspicion, his iron grip had left red marks on your skin.

“Overdoing it a little?”

“Is that how you plan to win against a villain? Whining?” His mood was rotten today, you had noticed the moment you entered.

“Why call me to train if you are like this? I don’t remember offering to be your sandbag.” Something flashed over his face, too fast to make out to expression, then he attacked again.

You drew back, this felt less and less like training. He followed, motions almost too quick to counter, a hit aimed at your head, dodged, a kick for your stomach – a fist caught you by the hair. Immediately you were slammed against the wall, letting out a pained noise –

“Keigo for fucks sake-“

“Interesting choice of words. I don’t remember you cursing so much before, is that _his_ influence?”

You let out an annoyed groan, but the grip in your hair tightened. “What is your problem-“

“Oh I don’t know, maybe it has something to do with seeing that bastard leave your home this morning-“

Your breath caught, your eyes met his – there was nothing but cold fury starring back at you. 


	27. Chapter 27

_Hawks perspective:_

“If you think I’ll just let this happen you are mistaken” even he heard the ice cracking in his voice. His little bird struggled in his grip, trying to free herself, but there was little space to even move. Tightening his fist he was rewarded with a small yelp.

“You thought you could betray me behind my back – not even trying to hide it – You invited this-” he struggled for a term “this stupid brute into your home, into your _bed_ – after everything -“ the disgust was overwhelming.

There was nothing left but disgust, helpless fury, bottomless disappointment – he had never expected such a betrayal, not truly, despite all his previous jealousy. But after all that happened, after he had tried so hard to fix things, just to be met with this blatant, disgusting, shameless behaviour – No. He would never have believed it.

“I hardly know what to do with you –“ his voice was out of breath, out of himself. He was losing control, a breaking point he never met, after all he was Hawks and Hawks never lost his cool. Trying to calm his breath he starred down at the subject of his anger.

“I tried to fix this. I tried to be good to you, give you as much freedom as possible, I wanted you to find your way back to me again, by your own volition, thought if I would just get us to spend time things would grow from there-“ they were facing each other, her eyes following his every motion, waiting for an opening – he did not care. He had tried, so long, so desperately, to win her back. All to be rewarded with _this_. He still held the girl by her hair, pinned against the wall of the training hall.

“I actually felt bad, you know?” he hardly knew what he was saying, an absurd laugh breaking his voice-“I felt bad. I wanted to take back all the things I did, thought I must have done something horrible to make you leave me, I swore to be patient, never to hurt you again-“ another low laugh rang in his throat.

“I even wanted to spare your little lover. With time he would be forgotten, I knew… I wanted nothing to get between us again, was ready to give you all the time in the world. When you didn’t talk to me at Mt. Fuji I smiled, when you turned away in the tent and didn’t want me close I decided to wait until you would ask me to be close to you again, no matter how long it would take-“

He caught himself again, momentarily loosening his grip – she immediately attacked, using the chance to throw him back and make for the exit – but red feathers barred the door before she could reach it.

She tried to rip them away, only managing to cut her hands open in the attempt. When she turned, lifting her arm to defend against him it was too late, a kick threw her against the wall, then the attacker was onto her again, a strong, brutal hand wrapping around the pretty little neck -

Slowly the fingers tightened – she tried to kick him – he blocked, as he blocked her punches - this close she just could not muster enough strength to hurt him much anyway.

“I’m done playing nice. There will be punishment for what you have done – and from now on you will obey my every word.”

_Your perspective:_

The words were sharp, their edges digging into your chest together with the lack of oxygen. “Do you understand that?” there was a soft inflection in the end, almost tender. He was insane – his whole unpredictable outbreak – he had simply, visibly lost it. His grip around your neck loosened, allowing you to take a proper breath.

“You know I don’t want to hurt you. If you had just understood earlier that we belong together-“You were lost. For a moment he waited for an answer, then let go of your throat completely, instead closing his arm around your waist, pulling you in and soft lips brushed against yours. His body was pressed against yours, nothing but trained muscles, a living monument to his life as a fighter – He sighed into the kiss, a hand wandering up to your neck.

You bit down on his lip. Rewarded with the metallic taste as you broke the skin you felt him try to pull back, but it was too late, your distraction had worked. His eyes widened in surprise. Your hands had wandered up to his neck as well and there, right under the spot where his blond curls ended, it stuck. A purple feather, not even half as long as your little finger.

“This is madness, Keigo. You fucking lost it-“ you stopped, as he stared back in your eyes. Apart from a slight dilation of his pupils there was no noticeable reaction.

The moment drew out into an eternity, your heart rate increasing for each second that passed.

“ _Must have thought that was a real finishing move, huh?”_ the words cut through you like a knife.

_This was not possible, it could not be possible -_

“You –I –“

“I _taught_ you. I _know_ you. Did you actually think I wouldn’t prepare for this?” The realization hit you like a train with full speed. An immunity, of course, but that meant –

“You’re an addict.”

“I’m immunizing myself against your strongest weapon. But how sweet of you to worry so much –“ something torturous laid in his smile.

There was no need to respond. To be so utterly immune to the substance could only be achieved with extreme abuse of it. Sure, he could take precautions, there were a lot of things to take that gave a slight tolerance but as this was your last resort weapon you kept a close eye on any counter agents. To pretend he wasn’t abusing opioids to reach this level of immunity was simply lying through his teeth. But what that left you with right now was a very angry hero – who also was undoubtedly high.

You felt yourself half lifted, half thrown against the wall behind, his body pressed against yours.

“It’s really that over to you, yeah? You thought you could knock me out - was that is all you thought about right now?” the lower registers that he had slipped into were little more than a growl.

“Is that what it is? You are just done with me, cheating on me with this brutish idiot, and you expect me to just **_take it_?!**” his face was close, glowering down at you.

“Keigo, we never –“

“Oh **_shut it_**! I don’t need you trying to twist the story any further. You wanted me – did you forget all our time together? What was it that you said when you told me you were quitting – ending our professional relationship? To even have the gall-” he spat on the floor, disgust beyond words spoke out of the gesture.

“Was that why we made out every time you got your hands on a cocktail? Why you slept in my bed, more often than your own, in my arms? And all of a sudden you think you can just walk out on me and replace me with this third rate wannabe -“

Only able to shake your head you stared down at the ground.

“Keigo, it’s not-“

“ ** _I’m fucking done with your lies!_** Are you playing that same game with him too?! Are you just unable to feel anything for anyone? You know, I actually excused it with your upbringing – I thought I had to give you time and space, let you learn to be comfortable with having someone in your life who cares-“

He laughed an ugly, cold laugh.

“Keigo, you _scared_ me!” the golden eyes fixated on you following those words, he was listening. “When you became so jealous, treating me more and more like a _possession_ – you got rid of anyone who got close to me or made sure they kept their distance, kept me from my friends, you kept me out of every fight, as if I was just there as your accessory – you started making all kinds of decisions for me-“ your voice broke, trying to explain how the dream of the popular hero liking you had slowly turned into a nightmare. You had developed a crush on Keigo from the first time you saw him, spending most of your teenage years scribbling your first name with his last name into your diary and guessing what colour wings your children would have. And here you both stood, six years in, separated by hurt too deep to ever forget.

Keigo stepped closer, blocking out the light.

“You never had any reason to fear me, love.” You knew the wall was behind you, the door still barred by his goddamn feathers- There had to be a way out, some way out –

“Until now.” His voice had grown dark and horrible, his pupils constricted to tiny black dots. “Now my patience is truly used up.”


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: There are violent flashbacks in this chapter. If you are sensitive to subjects like domestic violence, please don’t read the italicized parts, or even better skip the entire chapter, you won't be missing out on too much context, i can put a summary at the beginning of the next chapter if you want, tell me in the comments.
> 
> It's a rather dark chapter, if that might be a bit much for you please do skip it and wait for the next one, i promise something more cheerful ahead!

_Weeks later:_

_Hawks perspective:_

The cold had moved into his home together with her. Some days he wondered if this was not worse than the loneliness. Sometimes, in a calm moment, out on the roof alone with a cigarette or staring at his laptop he thought he knew why it might be – there had been hope before, despite everything else. But he had killed it, back in training hall B, when he had confronted her about her infidelity and proved her that he was done playing nice. All her sobs, curses, screams had left his heart untouched that day, even when they gave way to desperate pleas and finally quieted … No, his heart had been stone that day – and ever since she seemed to have turned just as cold.

_“You can’t do this – you would not – you are a goddamn hero, you **cannot** do this –“ fear had spoken out of her eyes, looking up at him as she wiped the blood away from under her nose, beaten wings fluttering as she tried to get back on her feet, swallowing the pain._

His eyes found her across the breakfast table, in a midnight blue morning robe, kimono style, contrasting with milky, clear skin like porcelain, but her face was emotionless, a silence surrounded her that was almost impossible to break. A chill ran through his body before he took another bite of his bagel. It had become a routine to order foreign food, a year ago such little attentions would have earned him a delighted smile. Now her breakfast laid there almost untouched, slender hands still resting in her lap.

_“Not so brave anymore, are you?” he turned the body with his foot and a whimper told him that there was still life in her. He would have thought to feel pity at the view but all he could find in himself was hatred. Tears had left lines on her face, mixing with the bloody smears. The eyes that stared up at him were overflowing with disbelief, shock and pain. “You have gone mad – you must have gone mad-“ it was whispered more to herself than him, as if to cling to an explanation. She stirred when he reached out to her, slowly raising an arm in a weak gesture of defence – it was enough to reignite his rage._

She had gotten thinner – there was no denying it anymore. He saw to it that she ate when he was around, at least a bit, but the beloved body was still melting away under his eyes. It was good she did not work anymore – not only did she seem too distracted, but he was not even sure if she was currently in shape for it. _Or if she wouldn’t just watch a gang of villains tear me to pieces at the first opportunity._ He silenced those dark thoughts quickly, though he was fairly sure not to have been far from the truth.

_There were bruises dotted over the frail little neck. A pretty pattern – something carnal was telling him to paint some more, but he knew to stop. It took several slaps to bring her to open her eyes again. When she did he was not sure she was fully there – a blank stare, not a hint of recognition – a kick in the stomach and she curled inwards. “Look at me!” he demanded. It took several more until his command was obeyed. “You’re killing me, Keigo” a toneless whisper._

_“No worries, it just feels that way” he almost smiled._

“What’s your plan for this weekend?” she asked, looking up from her still untouched plate. The sound of her voice startled him, he had expected the morning to pass in the usual quiet that had taken over their home long ago.

“Work. I was requested to help with an anti-League mission, I won’t be back until next Tuesday.”

“Oh, I see. There was a festival I wanted to go to…”the sentence trailed off. Maybe there was something almost like disappointment in her voice. It had been a while since she had shown interest for anything.

“No problem. Go by yourself or with a friend. That noisy redhead, or so. Don’t you know Kamui Wood’s sidekick, the plant haired girl? I’m sure you’ll find someone.” They both knew it would be no loss for her to go without him – but he was too tired to be very upset about it. Maybe a few days alone would do her good and if not… There was little risk of their relationship growing colder on any rate.

“Sure, if that is what you want.” Her tone was neutral again. “You’ll be late for work.”

“Oh, I’m sure I’ll make it in time. We’ll be out tonight, dinner with a journalist. Be ready at seven. There will be photographers.” He kissed her, briefly, meeting cold, dispassionate lips, then turned to go.

“Be safe.” The words surprised him. They were not spoken warmly – but it was still an unusual kindness. He turned back, pressing another kiss on her forehead. “I will” he promised, before leaving over the balcony. There was a glow of warmth in his stomach. ‘ _Be safe’_ she had said. Maybe there was some shimmer of hope left. His recommendation to go to the festival – his permission, if he was honest – must have made her happier than expected. A mental note was made to let his secretary pick out a pretty hairpin as a gift, to show he was serious in his support for the undertaking.

_The hours had molten into each other. A frail little body stretched out on the floor of the training hall, no longer resisting his embrace. Possessively he took in what was now his, had always been – she was made for him. Through all the years that knowledge had only grown within him. Now that he had taken his due, there was no way he would ever let her slip through his hands again. His fingers raised her chin, their lips meeting. A taste of salt and cupper on his tongue. It tasted of victory. “Say it again.” He demanded. Her eyes was closed but at the sound of his voice one flickered open. “I love you Keigo.” He grunted at the sound of fear in her tone and the words were repeated, this time with an appropriate amount of passion. “And you’ll stay with me and always be by my side.” That too was repeated to his satisfaction. His heart hurt. That this had been the only way, the only way to reach her…But it did not matter. He had reached her, and he would not let go, ever again._

Of course she had to stop working at the bastard’s agency after her betrayal and he had moved her back into his own home, thoroughly broken through any resolve and rebelliousness. They both had…changed, if that was a term to describe it. He had grown grim, commanding – the only way to succeed as he had realized. All concern for her wishes, or her affection, seemed wiped away in the first days. But he had found little happiness in taking what had been denied from him so long. All the life had left her eyes, leaving only a cold, stiff doll, the girl he had loved closed away beyond his reach. It had been a bitter victory. Sometimes he wondered if that was why it felt as if he had truly lost, not won…

Instead he had withdrawn as well, trying to find oblivion in opioid fuelled dreams or his relentless pursuit of his other white whale. Dabi proved as elusive as ever, but in truth Hawks was glad about that, if he had found the villain now and lost his last goal – no, he did not think he could take it much longer then. Sometimes he wondered if he was not approaching that point either way. The depth under him felt as if it was calling out, the city in the morning sun sparkling with glass and steel – for a moment he imagined how it would feel if he just stopped moving his wings. Keigo had never been scared of heights, or of falling – but this was more, a mysterious draw, a curiosity to find out what happened if he would just let go, closed his eyes and fell – he shook his head, imagining the headlines. He would not give the world that satisfaction, to call his immunisation to her weapon drug abuse, label him as unstable, depressed, have them politicise it. ‘What heroism is doing to us’, ‘The dark truth behind the top heroes’ and ‘Lunatics in capes – our heroes mental health crisis’ he could already see the goddamn think-pieces. No, he was not the type to give up.

 _Be safe_. The sentence rang in his ears and for a precious moment it drowned out everything else.

_When he laid down the abused naked body on his bed he felt a pang in his heart. It did not matter. Getting a bowl of warm water, a towel, disinfectant, ointment and bandages he sat down next to her. He had called a doctor friend of his who would heal her in her sleep, believing they had gotten into a bad villain attack. Bandaging her every wound he made sure to take his time, slowly take this moment in. All that had been denied to him for so long was now his. He brushed a strand of hair out of the sleeping little face._

He landed with a winning smile, waving to the civilians around. Time for patrol. His sidekick already awaited him.

“Good to see you, how are things?”

“Splendid” Hawks returned with a happy smile. “Let’s do this.”

“Always so full of energy!” the other laughed, following Hawks down the street under the citizens approving eyes.


	29. Chapter 29

_Bakugos perspective:_

The Summer Solstice celebration had finally come and he had never expected looking forward this much to his mother’s scheme. After how elusive Birdy had been in the past weeks, especially after quitting her job, he had been fairly surprised upon receiving a text asking where to meet them and had, after a few heated and confused moments trying to control his excitement, finally given her his parents address. And here he was, waiting for any noise outside that might announce her arrival.  
Kirishima had already come, together with his date – some quirkless girl who avoided being in the same room as Bakugou at all costs. They were all sitting in the garden, his parents and the two guests helping themselves to refreshments. His mother had brought him a lemonade and some melon slices inside, but he did not touch anything. His phone laid on the couch table, any minute expecting a message with an excuse for tonight, while his eyes were focused on the front door. From the garden his mother called. He did not bother to react.

Then he heard her explain loudly to the others: “He just won’t answer. In a rotten mood today, I hope that will get better. Here, sit down, I’ll go get him.”

Steps closed in behind him. “Your friends are waiting outdoors, Katsuki. You are being impolite-“

“Don’t care.”

“Not that tone with me, Katsuki!” his mother warned him. “Your last guest arrived and the poor thing looks as nervous as you are unpleasant today.” She laughed when he was right on his feet.

“When did she-“

“A minute ago, just landed in our backyard. Very pretty those wings – Oh, so you are joining us after all?”

Ignoring the mock tone he inspected the group outside. His father and Kirishima were sitting at a table, each with a beer, his dad being talked over by the hero who seemed in an especially good mood today. Hiding in his shadow was the shy girl he had brought, uncomfortably keeping her eyes fixed on Birdy – _Birdy_. His heart threatened to set out a beat and he swallowed hard. She had left him, ever out of reach after their argument but today would not be the day to worry about that. No, today she was here and that was enough. She was entertaining herself by exploring his parent’s garden, standing above the pond and trying to make out a fish hiding under the waterlilies. Her hair was open, softly playing in the wind – a strand tickled her nose and she gave a little sneeze, scaring of the fish that had just dared to come out. Childish curiosity had turned to disappointment on her face, before she sat down at the pond, touching the surface lightly with a blade of grass to trick the fishes into coming up to the surface.

“You gotta feed them if you wanna see them.” Quietly he had stepped behind her and offered a handful of fish food. “Like this” he threw in a little and sat down next to her in the grass. “Now we wait.”

They did not have to wait long. A pretty orange one went first, then a golden one joined him, followed by a few spotted fishes and soon they were all eating the food. Birdy let out a little giggle.

“You’ve got a very nice home. And your parents are so friendly.” Shyness kept her eyes fixed on the pond as she spoke, but he was happy to hear her again.

“I’m glad you came. My mom was quite excited. She plans to go all out– I fear you won’t have much of a say, the evening is planned up to the minutest detail.” He grinned and saw her careful smile. Another hand of fish food rained down on the pond, scaring of the animals at first but soon they were back in even greater numbers.  
Admitting this came easy - he hardly recognized himself in the straight out admission, but his heart was light. Now that she was here everything that had stood between them seemed insignificant, small difficulties that would easily be overcome as long as they were together.

From behind them a voice interrupted. “You two should join us, and then I’ll go inside with the girls soon, we’ll have to change. But there is no hurry yet, the temple isn’t far from here, we can get there by foot.” His mother explained. Offering Birdy a hand he got up. When they had joined the others to hear Kirishima laugh and his mother banter, he risked a look at the unexpected guest. Careful smiles, soft enough to make his chest ache. She had started a conversation with his father, inquiring how much work such a garden was and complimenting the pleasantness and serenity of the pond. The two seemed to get along well and his father’s calm and kind personality had quickly taken away any residual awkwardness.

Soon however the girls were whisked away by his mom, only sounds of her chatter and laughter coming out of the first floors bedroom window. It felt like a little eternity until clacking steps on the terrace announced their return – and it was quite the surprise. Kirishima let out a whistle and started enthusiastic applause, always his cheerful self, and his dad made a few quiet but warm remarks. The three women had been almost entirely transformed. His mother had held back regarding make up and he was grateful for that, there was nothing that could have pleased him more than the pretty blush on Birdies cheeks, but the rest was a little artwork in itself. From the decorated hairpin to the traditional patterned kimono down to her pretty feet in a pair of geta. It was simply precious and seeing how embarrassed she looked only assured him in that conviction. His mother and the other girl had been similarly made up – but he had little attention to share. Mumbling something about taking long enough he got up, not really knowing how to act – he could hear his mother’s snickering but even that hardly annoyed him right now.

Birdy’s voice brought him back to the present, she seemed to have gotten over her initial shyness and was now all excitement: “Your mom said there would be lanterns everywhere, and food and games and fireworks and everyone will be dressed like us – aren’t you going to change too?”

Of course, it was her first event like this, no wonder she was excited. Now it was his turn to blush. “No, guys don’t usually dress up…” he looked away.

“Guys totally do– I’m quickly gonna change and we can get going. Katsuki is just a coward!” Kirishima shared his unasked opinion.

“Who invited you anyway?!” Katsuki shot back but his best friend only laughed it off and went inside.

“Here” he looked away as he showed the little paper tray of Takoyaki into her hand.

“Huh?”

“You like these, don’t you?” it was awkward, awkward as hell. The lanterns in the trees and spanning between stands and buildings, shining a warm light down onto them…the whole celebration had been awkward, this family stuff and her so dressed up, Katsuki had hardly found it in him to say much and when he did it came out all wrong, grumpy and defensive. Every time she discovered something new he had seen her wings flutter excitedly and the smile that brightened up her face –

“Thank you.” She looked down, apparently feeling the same strange tension between them.

“Look at those suckers” Kirishima grinned at his date. “Can’t handle the romance. My best friends are the biggest dorks.” He pretended that he had only now seen that they were looking at him. “Yeah I’m talking about you two! What’s taking so long, huh?” he grinned, then returning to his conversation with his date and Bakugo’s mom. His father was quietly following, seemingly enjoying the social break and just taking in the scenery. Even Katsuki had to admit that it was quite pretty – more than that, even.

“Hey, Sir, would you take a picture of my family? That would be so kind, thank you, thank you – Everyone, gather around, No, Eijirou, you have to stand in the background, you are too big, yes like Katsuki, good boy, now all a little closer, wait, let me get into the picture –smile!” The stranger was thanked again and they were all free, a deep blush colouring Katsuki’s face.

As the group manouvered through the crowd and along the stands, under the warm glow of lanterns all around, his hand found hers. Reassuringly soft and warm in his grip, he led it to his lips, pressing a kiss against her skin.

_Your perspective:_

You could hardly hide your surprise when you spotted a familiar head of purple hair in the crowd.

He seemed to be moving towards you. “Did you invite Shinsou?” you turned to Eijiro, who had finally finished his meat skewers and was now fully available again. His date had disappeared a few minutes ago, excusing herself for an important call.

“Mentioned it to him, didn’t expect him to show up here though. But the more the merrier!”

Katsuki did not seem to share the sentiment, he had quite suddenly gotten over the awkwardness of it all possessively wrapped an arm around your waist – it was almost adorable, if it couldn’t get you into so much trouble. You slipped out of his grip and welcomed your former teammate with open arms.

“Good to see you here! I wouldn’t have assumed you were a fan of such events.”

He gave you a half smile before politely greeting Bakugos parents, clapping Eijiro on the shoulder and welcoming his date. The girl stared at him with shock-wide eyes, apparently almost as terrified of him as she was of Katsuki. Mrs Bakugo had taken the poor thing under her wing but you could not conceive why Eijiro would bring her to such a gathering at all.

For a second you questioned your own sanity in coming here – but you had sworn yourself not to think of the reality, not tonight, this meeting had been the one thing you had clung to in order to survive the horror of the past weeks. For just one night you wanted to be free of _him_ – and with your face hardly known to the public there was little risk to be recognized, you hoped, not in this crowd. Maybe you would tell Bakugou everything when you were back at his parent’s home, maybe you would ask him to run away together – under the warm light of the lanterns everything seemed possible for a moment.


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I was a little late updating this time, i'd apologize but honestly you guys seem to be pretty understanding and i simply wasn't feeling so well. No harm done i hope, enjoy the chapter!

Katsuki’s mom had insisted that the men had to drink a cup of sake together and nobody dared to defy her wishes so the group was split and suddenly you were left alone with her and Eijirou’s shy date. She at least seemed to relax noticeably when the others were out of sight, apparently you scared her less than the other heroes.

“We still have an hour until the fireworks start. Let me invite you two on some dango and maybe a lemon sour – We’re all adults here” she laughed over the other girl’s mild protest. “The men are having a drink, why shouldn’t we?” and before you could say anything she had taken you both by the hands and was leading you through the crowd.

Soon after the three of you were sitting on a bench, each a dango and a drink in a paper cup in front of you.

“So, now I want to get to know you two a little – I have to know who my boys are fawning over after all” she laughed before turning left – you were lucky enough not to be the first target of her motherly curiosity.

“Eijiro told me a lot about you. You are an activist and quirkless I heard, with some _wild_ friends – is it true that one of them kicked him out of your place?”

The girl went red but Mrs Bakugo laughed. “No worries, dear, I think that was only good for him.”

You cursed yourself for forgetting her name, there had just been so much happening at once when you had been introduced and asking now would be quite uncomfortable.

She was rather pretty, blushing sweetly in her embroidered Yukata.

“I am a translator, working with foreign scientists, but I got to know Eijiro because of my activism in the quirkless rights movement, surely you heard of the recent protests – he is an example most heroes could learn a lot from. Including your son, with all due respect.” For a moment you were speechless, but Mrs Bakugo’s laughter broke the tension. You swallowed. The girl certainly had guts. You eyed her more curiously now – a rather recent looking scar on her arm caught your attention and another on her hand. Maybe you shouldn’t have discarded her quite so early. Now you were no longer wondering why she was terrified of Katsuki – his methods of crowd control had not made him a favourite with the protesters.

“You might have a point there, Katsuki is a little too headstrong for his own good – or anyone else’s. It must not have been easy to be open about those opinions, but I respect that you told me the truth, if I’m honest Eijiro had already informed me about your opinion on most heroes. They hold too much powers over others and some will always abuse that power, huh?” at these words you noticed Bakugo’s mom eyeing you curiously. With growing concern you began to worry how much of _your_ personal information Kirishima had divulged.

“Smart with a sharp tongue, I see why he likes you. So, now to our little bird – what should I know about my future daughter in law?”

The question caught you like a punch in the gut, you accidentally spilled some of your lemon chuhai, rubbing frantically at the spot with a napkin.

“I –I – We-“

She laughed again, visibly enjoying your awkwardness. “I was joking, dear. Though I would not be too surprised, he seems quite serious about you.”

“We – Surely Katsuki has told you that we are not together – in any way. Really –“

“Sure, he insists on that.” She eyed you closer. “Why is that anyway? You like him too, don’t you?”

You were speechless, going first pink and then red. You certainly knew where Bakugo had gotten his rather forward attitude –

“You are making her uncomfortable, Mrs.” The accusing voice of the other girl broke the tense silence. You could have hugged her right now. “Surely no woman should have to justify whom she is dating or not – and in a job with so much public interest…” she left the sentence open ended, tastefully pretending that not everybody in the country knew about your very public relationship drama.

You shot her a grateful look and earned a smile.

“Of course. You’ll have to forgive me, I just saw how much you two care about each other and of course I want the best for my son. But that does not excuse meddling.” She nodded, letting off for now. Her warm hand now rubbed your shoulder. “Excuse me, dear, I did not mean to corner you.” It sounded genuine. The warm touch felt strange, like any interaction with Mrs. Bakugo felt. Warm, patient, a little strict, but somehow you felt like she truly cared.

“I have never been to a festival before.” You tried to change the topic, admiring the lanterns, revelling in the lights and stands, music and laughter and the delicious scents all around. “Everyone looks so pretty – you two” you nodded to the other two women “are fabulous – is it always like this?”

“I am glad you are enjoying it. Wait until you see the fireworks.” She gave you a smile, open and motherly. “We should do this again, it would be nice to come together and do something once in a while. Heroes and their families usually don’t meet very often, too much work. You two can sleep at our place, we have a guest room and the boys can sleep in Katsukis old room. I don’t want to know you out at night, not when I caused it and it will be nice to have some life back in the house.”

A warm fuzzy feeling that had nothing to do with the drink, spread in your belly.

“I think I would like that.”

The other girl nodded carefully, you could imagine that she was still a lot less comfortable with the thought of sleeping under one roof with three heroes, but the talk with Katsuki’s mother seemed to have broken the ice.

“I’ll get us another round and then we should find the men and search for a good spot to watch the fireworks.” Mrs. Bakugo got up, leaving the two of you alone on the bench.

The other girl spoke first.

“Eijiro talks a lot about you. I can’t pretend that I haven’t heard a lot of what’s going on in your life from him – I hardly know you, but you seem really sweet. So I’m hoping you are doing fine.”

She didn’t look at you directly saying that, instead she watched the crowd, as if not to put you on the spot. Tears blurred your sight, but it felt like relief. You had not noticed it until now, but in all this mess, with the media and the public against you, it had been a long time since someone else, besides your closest friends, had extended even basic decency towards you. You swallowed hard.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-“ she started, but you interrupted her.

“Thank you. I…I haven’t heard those words in a while. Things are… not easy. Sometimes I feel like I’m losing control over my life –“ you took a deep breath, this was getting a bit personal for talking to a total stranger. So you tried to smile, holding on to your empty cup. “But I’m figuring them out. I know you must think I’m a total bitch for abandoning my best friend like that, but...” you did not know how to explain why you had avoided Eijiro in a while.

“-but you don’t want to involve him in something he can’t solve for you?” she offered.

“Yeah. Yeah, that fits it pretty perfectly. I love him a lot but there are things…”

“I know. Hey. I know I’m just a stranger, but Eijirous friends can certainly count on me – especially after the media circus you’ve been through, trust me I got my opinions on powerful heroes doing – let’s not dive into it.” She laughed but it was rather joyless. “But if you ever need someone to talk about things, with someone with a _non-hero_ approach of things, or need to disappear from the media for a while… After how much Eijiro talks about you I feel like I already know you, so I hope I’m not too forward. But I don’t know… If I were you I would want to escape that world for a while. And my roommate makes mad cocktails – I think you would like her. She’s a wild one.” It was a little rambled, but you understood the offer well enough.

There were no words to express how you felt – you were interrupted by the reappearance of Katsukis mom, balancing three cups in her two hands. “I hope I didn’t have you waiting too long. There was a line – apparently I wasn’t the only one who had the idea to refill before it starts”

“Not at all. It was – really nice actually. I think you could say we befriended each other.” You grinned over to your new, still nameless friend. She grinned back, cheering over with her drink.

“That’s how I imagined that!” Bakugo’s mom laughed, cheering you both with her paper cup and putting one arm around you motherly. “No drinking and flying, dear, you’re sleeping at our place.”

It took a while until you had reunited with the guys, moving through the crowd was anything but fast, but there was so much to discover for you and the other two took the time to explain every tradition. Your new girlfriend was a surprising source of knowledge, telling interesting stories about the background of some of these traditions and Mrs Bakugo pushed you to try anything if the line wasn’t too long, stopping the way back so often that it was just twenty minutes to the fireworks when you finally reached the meeting point. Full, entertained and with cheeks glowing from excitement you were reunited with Bakugo and decided to greet him with a kiss on the mouth.

His surprise was tangible, though pleasant. “What did you do with Birdy?” he asked his mom suspiciously over Eijiros giggles.

His mother ignored him, turning to her husband. “Did you have a good time? We should find a spot soon, come on.” He replied in his calm, pleasant manner and led the group to a free spot a little apart from the crowd. There were no benches, but a blanket was spread so nobody would ruin their clothes in the grass.

“Hey” someone touched your shoulder lightly. You looked up into piercing indigo eyes. “Can I borrow you for a moment? It won’t take long.”

Behind him you could see your new friend pull a face, softly shaking her head. You would tell her to worry less about him when you caught her alone later, Katsuki you could understand because of his temper but Shinsou was quite friendly to civilians.

“Of course. What’s the matter?” Bakugos dad helped you up, reminding you that the spectacle would start soon and with the small steps a Kimono and especially the Geta required of you followed the young man.

“It’s important, but I couldn’t tell you there with everyone around.” He led you through the crowd, then down a small path. There were fewer people around now, all hurrying to reach the open place to watch the fireworks.

“So what is it-“ you were hurrying after him. By now you had passed the treeline behind the temple and left behind the lights and lanterns. Your foot slipped on something in the dark and you let out a little scream but he had you, holding you by your arm. After that he allowed you to hold on, but did not slow down.

“Shinsou…?” your tone was worried now. You did not want to miss the highlight of your first festival, but this seemed very important to him. It could not be about work, then he would be talking to Eijiro and maybe Katsuki, not you who had stopped working recently.

“Shinsou, please, what is going on?” but no answer came, he only led you deeper into the dark woods – was this even a path? You realized that you could no longer hear the celebration or see even a shimmer of the lights, there was nothing but dark forest around. You stopped.

“This is not funny, Shinsou. We’ll miss the firework and the others are surely worried. I am not dressed for night walks in the woods. I’m going back now.” Sourly you turned around – but there already was somebody.


	31. Chapter 31

“NO-“ you stepped back, running into Shinsou. “No!”

“Nice to see you too” the newcomer turned his head sideward, offering you a welcoming grin. A familiar one, a scarred face held together with staples and greeting you, appearing like some kind of monster on the first look. You startled, stumbling back a step.

“Suits you.” Dabi gestured at your Kimono. It took a second before your brain had put the pieces together, had realised it could be no coincidence that your friend had led you to meet the scarred villain in the woods-

“Shinsou, how could you?! I never thought you of all people-“

“Don’t be too hard on your friend. He hasn’t quite been himself since a while.” Dabi’s voice was calm, but apparently he had made a joke. Shinsou let out a laugh.

“It was some work to keep it up, I gotta admit – These copies shatter all the darn time – but they played the job good enough for hardly anyone to pick up anything. And for big events like today we always have our little friend here.”

There was a not very Shinsou-like giggle coming from behind you. You elbowed backwards, hitting him flat in the chest and opened your wings, ready to-

“Bitch!” he hissed. You felt something metallic and cold against your throat.

“Toga, don’t. I told you not to harm her before I say so.” The cold thing vanished. They could not copy his quirk otherwise he did not need to lure you out here, he could just command- but that made no sense, you had seen him use his quirk lately and he had still been working actively – something did not add up here. Shinsou’s teammate – he had been in a coma for a while – you felt sick to your core. It was hardly a coincidence that a flipped agent’s closest contact, the one who would first notice anything off, was suddenly out of the picture. This had been going on for a long time, warning the league what the heroes knew – if they told you then because you would not be telling anyone, one way or another.

“I don’t think this will work.” The false Shinsou complained. “She hates you. I thought you said you had a lot in common.”

“Oh we do-“ but his answer was cut off, you had spun around, opening one wing in each of their faces – as your wings were the strongest muscles in your body and had the power to carry the weight of two bodies, the strength of a full blow to the head was not to be underestimated. You took off, for a moment thinking you might make it – pain shot through your body when you crashed into the branches above. You tried to find a way through but the forest was too thick and it was too dark – blue light shooting towards you fixed that real quick, the tree you had almost entangled yourself with was now set aflame. Shinsou was there, using the terrain like a trained acrobat – something shimmered and you fell in height, closely avoiding a throwing knife that stuck in the trunk above you – but you had sunk too deep now. From below you could feel someone grab your Kimono and yank you to the ground. Off-balance from dodging the knife attack you were not prepared to lift yourself against his strength and Dabi managed to slam you down, you landed on your chest. The weight on your back told you Dabi stood above you, one foot on your shoulders. Blue light shone down on you.

“Don’t make me set that pretty outfit aflame.”

“What do you want, Dabi?”

“The same as always, darling. Join me.”

“Why in the world would I do that all of a sudden?” but the sentence came out rather flat, as if you thought he knew the answer and would share it with you. In truth, you had thought of his offer often in the past weeks. It seemed to be the only way. And somehow you had a feeling that he would take a third rejection of his offer less than good.

“You’ll have to tell me for yourself, afterwards. But we watched you. You care about them. You wanna be part of that family, you wanna have a normal life – and we both know that ain’t happening. I can’t give you that life. But I can give you revenge against the one who took that possibility from you.” You had not expected that. The scarred villain did not seem like the kind of person with a deep psychological insight.

“You can’t go on like this. He will find out – and he _will_ hurt them. Do you think he will ever forgive that you chose someone else – _or_ do you rather think he is obsessed and can never admit a loss, going so far as to take out the competition? _You_ have the power to end this. Team up with me and you’ll be free of him.”

There you laid on the forest ground, confronted with an impossible choice. Become a villain and assist in murder. Or live on like this, knowing you could have prevented the harm that would surely come over the happy group you had left back at the festival. Crawl back into your cage and pray nobody had seen you here, pray for another day and another, by _his_ side-

The sound of explosions was booming through the night, first you thought the fireworks had started but the sky above remained dark. Dabi let his flame extinguish, but the noise was getting closer and the burning tree was one big lighthouse calling out your position.

“Birdy!” you had not expected that they would already be looking for you. But here he came, your own hero, always there – your brave, loyal Katsuki, who did not even knew about the danger he was in. Tears ran down your cheeks.

“Birdy – what is this bastard doing here?!” and here he was, your valiant knight, smashing into the villain and landing between them and you, shielding you with his body. “What the fuck, Shinsou you betraying bastard! You led her to this psycho- I will kill you for that!” Dabi raised an eyebrow, looking past Bakugo at you.

“Your choice. He’s a good kid. Do you really wanna see him hurt?” You had to chose now – there was no escaping Hawks, you knew that, now you could only chose whose life you were willing to throw away – Bakugous, by telling him and allowing him to fight Hawks, even with your help – or your own.

“I’m your opponent, you freak. Leave her alone! You’re gonna be the one hurt-“ he dropped to his knees. You caught him. A small purple feather stuck in the back of his neck.

“I’m so sorry, Katsuki. I am so sorry” you whispered in his ear.

“You-“ was all he managed to bring out, then he fully collapsed but his tone of shock and disbelief had made clear that he had realized your betrayal. You struggled to hold him.

“Smarter than you look.”

You ignored the villain and the fake Shinsou’s excited giggle. You would not allow Bakugou to throw his life, his future away by fighting Hawks. Even if he survived, even if you both survived, there was no way you would not become known as the villains who brought down the number two hero. Katsuki would not become a villain for you, not if you could help it. His future mattered more than your love – he could grow to hate you, they all could, they could be safe and live their lives and never know the danger you had almost brought upon them.

“We will bring him somewhere and I’ll call Eijiro to find him.” Dabi rolled his eyes but helped you carry your knocked out lover out of the forest. There was little more to say. You insisted to wait on a nearby rooftop after putting him on the bench and pulling out the feather until you could see Eijiro and the others behind him rush down the street. Finally you turned away and followed the two dark shadows in front of you.


	32. Chapter 32

Day 1:

“Get up!” someone was hammering against the door. You pulled the blanket up, refusing to react. _It can’t be real. If I don’t move this isn’t real._ But the knocking was insistent.

Yesterday seemed to be nothing but a dream, the first time in so long that you truly had felt alive – and the dark wave taking over as Dabi had appeared, confronting you – you had drowned in desperation. And seeing Katsuki stand up for you you had acted without thinking much, all you had known was that you could not allow Hawks to hurt him. The first hours you had hardly felt anything.

But it was a new day and the knowledge of what you had done – whom you had joined – it was impossible to bear. You were a villain. A League member. The kind of monster you had lived to face until now. Now you had nothing left – having attacked Katsuki and left him back, him and Eijirou, to go down the path that would lead you to fight your old mentor – everyone you had ever loved, every friend, every former classmate was your enemy now. Everything you had fought so hard to achieve – and now the last sacrifice was made.

The hammering against the door was just a backdrop to your misery, the soundtrack to your desperate thoughts. Curled up on the mattress, your head in your hands, fingers buried in your hair…

The bed shifted. Someone was sitting down next to you. How had they even gotten in here? It was too dark in the room to make out anything, even if you lifted your head but the smell of leather, smoke and a hint of a musky perfume told you who it was next to you.

“Hey” his tone was softer than you had expected. “You should get up. It’s already late.”

There was no reason to answer the villain. You were not sure you had the strength to move anyway. Or speak.

A sigh, then the other leaned closer. “Look, this isn’t a good place to have a breakdown. You still haven’t proved yourself and I’m really not the kind of person to cheer anyone up-“

Hesitantly he put a hand on your shoulder and shook it. “Come on. Time to get up.”

Your eyes were still closed. Somehow you felt far away from all this. The touch hardly seemed to reach you, just a body that wasn’t really yours anymore…

When you came to again Dabi was gone. Not sure whether you were glad about that or not you stayed exactly where you were. It was probably good he was gone, he was a villain after all, the one who had brought you here – and yet it was hard not to feel a little disappointed, he had seemed kind today, though a little helpless in dealing with you.

“Here is food. You should really eat something.” The scent of a noodle soup reached you and you heard him set down a tray next to you. When you still did not react you felt yourself pulled into a proper sitting position.

“Come on. Eat.” Something warm was pushed into your hand and you found yourself holding the bowl. Slowly your consciousness rose from the depth it had slumbered in. The scent was rather appetizing and you suddenly felt as if you had not eaten in an eternity.

Wordlessly you began to eat. Your companion sat next to you, leaning against the wall and watching you with an unreadable expression. Neither of you said a word until you put down the empty bowl.

“It’s time to get up now. You’ll get in trouble – Shigaraki isn’t really the understanding type. Nobody asked about you ‘til now but it would be helpful to have you leave your room today.”

In response you shook your head.

“You’re taking it pretty hard, huh?” his face had the same sneering expression it always showed, at least as far as was discernible in the dark, but his voice was not as sarcastic and sharp as usually. “It’ll get easier. Don’t think much about it, just do it step by step. You came here with a goal, with a plan, didn’t you? Then follow it. You can’t show weakness here…” he swallowed the next words and ended a little more carefully: “I’d rather not bring up any questions about your loyalty to the League. Shigaraki was not happy there was a fight, we lost our clone-agent when Bakugou saw me there – the plan was to have you ’attack’ the fake and continue sending Twice’s clones once this was wrapped up. He is not happy at all, we lost a great spy and all we got was you. Better prove useful, dear.”

With that he got up and turned on the light. You blinked into the brightness. “You’re still in your kimono – and you got mud all over your face.” He watched you for a moment and when he realized there would be no reaction he sighed, stepped in and dragged you to your feet without an explanation. You were about to complain but he already pulled you along into the corridor and then a bathroom. “I’ll give you half an hour and when you come out here you’ll be clean and come train for at least an hour. You don’t need to speak but I expect you to at least make an attempt.” With that he left. For a moment you stood there lost but finally you slipped out of the clothes and stepped into the stream of hot water raining down on you.

Training was painful and Dabi was merciless, fighting you hand to hand and not pulling his punches. The numb feeling helped insofar that you were saved the humiliation you would usually experience from having your ass handed to you in such a manner. When he let off and allowed you to leave your entire body ached.

Day 6:

The next days followed a similar pattern, Dabi pushed you to eat, you were dressing in a mix of Togas leggings and washed-out black shirts Dabi had wordlessly left in your room. The manner of your changing sides had not given you opportunity to come with packed suitcases of fitting clothes and you did not feel like asking for leave to go shopping. Slowly you became acquainted with the far off manor these headquarters were located in. You had been lucky enough not to run into your new boss yet. After almost a week you made another shocking discovery. You had checked the basement for another punching bag to put up in the gym – you had been warned to stay away from the laboratory and were only too willing to comply – but what you found was no less disturbing than the Nomu that would await you in the lab.

A heavy metal door with an opening at the bottom, just big enough to shove through a tray of food – and that was exactly what stood in front of it. Curious you stepped closer and bent down to pick it up – A hand closed around your wrist, painfully strong. It had shot through the open slit faster than you could react. A scream escaped you but there was nobody in earshot to hear you.

“Who are you- let me go!”

There was no answer but the grip tightened and pulled your arm into the cell – because that was what it was, as you realized in fear. “Hey –“ you fought desperately but whoever it was on the other side was much stronger than you.

“Answer me! –What do you want from me? I can’t let you out, I don’t even know how, this door is locked and I got no idea how to –“ you felt your hand being lead higher and then you felt – something soft. Wild curls wrapped around your fingers. The person behind the door led your hand down and you felt a face, stubble covering sharp cheekbones. Now your fingers met with something like a metal and silicone mask covering their mouth.

Finally you were free and pulled back your hand as fast as you could, stepping back from the door. There were a few hairs wrapped around your fingers. In the light they almost seemed to have the colour of – Oh no

“Shinsou?” Horror spoke out of your voice. As a response he knocked on the door. You stumbled back. Weak knees almost gave in as you hastened up the stairs, almost shoving Dabi out of the way as you hurried into your room.

The villain was calling something after you but you did not hear him over the pounding of your own heart.

_Hawks perspective:_

This possibility had not even occurred to him. That she would do this – dare to – it seemed impossible, she could not –

If she had left the country he would know, if she was sighted at any hero agency. If she wrote her friends he would know, if she visited her goddamn mother he would be informed – but nothing.  
Apparently she had simply vanished, swallowed by the earth, from one day to another.

Maybe someone had kidnapped her – but no, she had more than sufficient motivation to disappear all on her own. Of course he would not just accept this – but until now he had heard nothing and with every passing sleepless night his anger cooled and in its place was a dark, nameless fear.

Day 7:

“Mission! Move your ass and get dressed, doll face! Mask and equipment is in the basement, we need air coordination during an attack on the city.”

That had been all Dabi told through your door and half an hour later you were soaring above the burning city center, wearing a closed helmet with a zoom display, warning Shigaraki of incoming heroes over his earpiece, coordinating their fight from above. It was pandemonium. Three Nomu were let lose, spreading terror in the fleeing bystanders – you swallowed. No time for feelings – Dabi had taken you aside when getting ready, grabbing on to your arm as you were leaving the gadget room and pulling you aside. Warm breath ghosted over your face as he was looming over you, the same unreadable look you had seen before on his face. _Fuck this up and you’re done for._ Had that been a threat or a warning of Shigaraki’s wrath?

Either way, you had given up too much to be here, out of Hawks reach, plotting your revenge, you would not, _could_ not fail tonight. It was late and the heroes were too busy on the ground to pay much attention to the dark sky above them, the lights and roaring fire underneath obscuring you from any onlookers by sheer contrast. A dark shadow in a quiet night sky – all you had to do was avoid the news helicopter circling the scene.

Under you there was a scream. A woman, cornered by a Nomu, she was struggling to escape up the street – into a dead end as you knew just too well. _No-_ “Shigaraki, call back Nomu 2, now –“

“Heroes approaching? Do I need him?”  
You hesitated, just a second. It was enough.

“Don’t bother me again with your bleeding heart.”

The call for help became more desperate. She had realised there was no way out of this street. You could pick her up – and announce your allegiance that way. The Nomu had closed in at her – you turned away. Praying for a hero to come – there, a movement on the ground, three streets from your leader – that was enough for you. “Call Number 2, someone is advancing on you, he isn’t fighting anyone!”   
Under you you saw the dark shadow of the monster back out of the dead end, speeding towards its master.  
Where was she? You circled in, closer – the moment you saw what was in the dead end you startled back - nothing but gore welcomed you down there. _Too late_ – you had hesitated. And it had cost a life.

 _Don’t waste a second, when someone is in danger – you will learn that quickly as young heroes._ Your teachers voice rang in your ear. She was dead. The woman was dead and you could have saved her. Suddenly the noise of the inferno under you seemed endlessly far away.

Just minutes later Shigaraki called to retreat. You hardly heard him.

Back in the base you had been the first in the bathroom you shared with Toga, first standing under the hot water, wishing it could wash the memory off of you – the image –

Suddenly you were choking – just fast enough to reach to toilet, your disgust making itself air. When you were done being sick you remained on your knees, tears streaming down your cheeks. What had you done?

You would not continue this – not a day longer – they were murderers, carrying out attacks against civilians, they were holding your friend in the basement, being part of the of the group that did this, eating with them, training with them –

Disgust rose as bile in your throat. One of them. You were now one of them – what would Eijirou say if he saw you side by side with Dabi and Toga? Oh god what did Katsuki think? He knew – if he still remembered he must know, thinking you betrayed him, thinking –

How long until you were carrying out attacks with them, murdering civillians, becoming feared by the people -

A sob broke from your constricted chest, painful, tears burning like acid on your cheeks.

The woman you had not saved – she must have been terrified, she must have been desperate, being grabbed by this gruesome monster and –

God she must have had a family, people who loved her mourning her death and you could have saved her, maybe without your coordination the Nomu would never have caught her, it might have been by its masters side to protect him -

You had been a hero – you had fought so hard to be one and somehow life had turned so dark in the past months, what were you now–

Someone hammered against the door.  
“Getcha ass outa there, I wanna wash off this filth!” Togas words were rough but her tone cheerful – _cheerful_.


	33. Chapter 33

Day 10:

It had taken you several days to collect yourself and return to the cell where you had found your former friend. But here you were, sitting on the ground and passing a paper and pen back and forth through the slit in the door. They had forced him into some kind of devise, a sort of mussel that prevented him from speaking and apparently only allowed him to open his mouth to eat at specific times when they were careful to have nobody around who might fall victim to his quirk. The fact that you were now on the side other side of the door, freely moving amongst his captors was almost too much to bear. But that gave you no right to avoid him or not to do your best to help him in some way.

It took a while before the latest scribbled message was returned through the opening in the metal door.

“I’m so sorry you are locked up here. I don’t really know how to help you, they don’t trust me and I have a task to do here…” guilt spoke out of your voice. In the beginning he had written you what he thought of someone like you, having everything handed to them in life that he had to fight for and then changing sides, but his temper had cooled and in the end he was too lonely to reject the friendly company. Instead he had made a handful of reasonable requests – a second blanket, more water, maybe a coffee once in a while – the fact that he was locked in there for months, since the attack on the summer camp as it had dawned on you, was horrifying. This true hero was locked up and here you were on the side of his captors, making yourself feel better by bringing him little surprises.

“I’m sorry.” You had said it more often than you could count. The rest you had not told him as it seemed too selfish to share your reasons and whine to someone who was going through this. Instead you just sat there and kept him company, giving him some way to express himself, someone to write to, even if it was a person he must despise now.

Day 21:

“Low, right-“ you used a powerful swing of your wings to dodge the short attack Dabi had announced and swung to the left, avoiding the one to the right. The satisfied hum in your headphone told you that you had improved. “Ok, target at eight o’clock, towards” – you immediately let yourself fall, turning in the air and throwing three of your purple feathers, hitting the exact spot he had described. When you landed, with one hand on the ground to lower the impact Dabi was already awaiting you, engaging you in hand to hand combat, taking over the role of your opponent. You had landed in a low position, one hand on the ground and trying to bounce right back but he was faster - before you could even find your balance you had to block a kick with one wing – it stung, but you had grown stronger again since you were here. You used your lowered position and slid forward, trying to kick his legs out from under him – to your surprise Dabi did not try to jump over them as you had planned so you could knock him down with a violent hit of your wing, instead he moved forward, moving in like a striking viper and before you could try to get distance between the two of you again he was already on you, pinning your back to the ground, his weight entirely on your chest, one hand wrapped around your throat.

“Dead again.” It was spoken in a lower register than he had used through the rest of your training. Uncomfortably you tried to wiggle out from underneath him but the villain on your chest showed no inclination to move.

“You are getting better but you are still abysmal at close combat. And I won’t be able to use my quirk when you are so close in a real fight, unless you want to be grilled too, so I can’t help you if someone gets you.” He explained for the thousandth time.

“I know.” You tried not to look too sulky, but you could see from the grin on his face that he looked right through you. “Now get off me.”

Nothing. Again you tried to wiggle your way out. With an insolent spark in his eyes the villain was watching your attempts. “Toga and Spinner are going to a bar tonight. We could join them. You must be bored always sitting in your room and your constant misery is starting to get on my nerves.” He was entirely relaxed, apparently nothing in the world was more comfortable to him than asking you to go out while pinning you down.

“Are you asking me out on a date?” that should shut him up.

But the scarred face only drew into a smug grin. “I don’t ask girls out until after the third time. But hey, join me in the shower and we can fill the quota by tonight-“

You huffed and he chuckled, finally getting up and offering you a hand. Dabi’s flirtation were about as fun as life here got. Outside of training and missions everyone kept to themselves, with some of the League members you had not exchanged a word since you arrived. Though, thinking about it you were not sure that was a bad thing.

The hot water running down your back relaxed the aching muscles a little. You began massaging them, before gripping a loofa and soaping the root of your wings, cleaning them from the sweat your training had produced.

_‘You gotta take good care of those wings of yours.’_ The sentence peaked up from your memory without invitation. ‘ _Everyone should treasure what’s special about them and you’ve got a real gift. Mankind always dreamed of flying.’_

It had been so long since you heard those words. Back then his wide smile made your heart beat faster and you could not have imagined anyone shining as bright. Keigo had always had a way with words, despite his carefree attitude veiling his stunning intelligence. The speech you remembered so well was the one he gave you when he trying to convince you to try his special avian shampoo and conditioner. _‘It oils back, helping you keep your feathers fit for all weathers!’_ he had exclaimed, with such true conviction that you burst out laughing – with his shining white teeth and enthusiastic slogan he looked like a TV-ad come to life. The memory almost made you chuckle, before you remembered what you both had become.

With a darkened mood you got out of the shower, wrapping your dripping curls in a towel and then rubbing down your wings with another one towel. In the mirror you saw a lean, trained body – a few injuries that were currently healing, a handful of blue spots spread over the smooth skin but under that you were all muscles, the rigorous training plan you had made for yourself left time for eating and sleeping but little else and all available sparring partners were deadly opponents and had little inclination to go easy on you. The face that looked back from the mirror had changed as well. Sharper lines marked it, the last bit of a soft baby-face molten away by rigorous training and grief. Dark, hard eyes stared at you, telling of sleepless nights. Once you were dry you got dressed, leaving the bath without another look back at the stranger in the mirror.

Dabi seemed to have found his way to his room already and for a moment you were tempted to follow and seek his company. The last month had been lonelier than you had imagined to ever feel again since Hawks had taken you in.

Decidedly you passed Dabi’s door and walked down the corridor to your own. From under your bed you pulled out your phone. Right now you could not have been more thankful to the strict policy making hero phones untraceable, with the resoning that any technology could get abused by villains and tracing heroes location would be too great a risk – and right now you could kiss whoever came up with that idea, leaving you a last lifeline to the outside. It would have been too painful to look through the pictures you had taken in happier days – you did not even allow yourself to think of the names of those you missed. But it was still a welcome distraction to be able to read some news from the outside world.

The quirkless protests were exploding all over the country, advocating for better treatment, Shotou was the face of the conservatives, arguing for trust in our institutions and heroes. Red Riot had switched to a new agency, after Shinsou had disappeared. No new articles about the one you wanted to read about most.

**4 new messages** announced the display. You could check. They would not see that the message had been read – it would be torturous, but only to you. For a moment you chewed on the inside of your cheek, then tapped the little icon.

**Hawks 12:35:** If you think you can hide from me forever you are mistaken. This will not improve the relationship between us, I can promise you that much. We will meet soon and I am looking forward to hear you explain your disappearance.

_Oh we will meet soon enough_ , you thought grimly. Next was another message from your best friend. Fighting the urge to leave it unread, as his pleas tore on your heart each and every time he wrote…but what should you write him? That you were enemies now? That you had been driven to join those you had sworn to fight, that the next time you met it might be as opponents when you took down the man who had ruined your life – in the end your heart won and you opened the message.

**Eijirou 10:16 :** Please, please answer. I just want to help you, we are going mad from worry.

**Eijirou 1:29:** If you think you are being watched we can meet in secret, just send me any sign that you are fine. Bakugou is besides himself, endangering himself by searching for you, I am worried he is going crazy over this. I understand that you need a break from everything, I truly do, just please answer something, one message, just so we know you are fine.

Swallowing hard you stared down on the screen. If you answered now nothing would be won – better a sharp cut at once then his slow disillusionment. You didn’t think you could bear having Eijirou express his shock and disappointment, call you a villain – Bakugou, who had been there for your betrayal had not written at all – The name cut through your mind like a knife and you cursed yourself for letting your guard down and allowing your mind to go there. He was _searching_ for you – but with what motivation? You clearly remembered the shock and betrayal in his eyes, he knew – maybe he hated you just as much as Hawks did by now. Instead of torturing yourself much longer you moved on to the last message, the only one not to cause you any pain.

**Unknown number 3:58:** Hey, I hope its ok I asked Eijirou for your number. We talked at the mid- summer festival, right before you disappeared. I’m so sorry, I knew that this Shinsou guy was off but I couldn’t say anything in front of the rest, I’m so sorry. I know I already offered my help back there, but I mean it. Not a word to our hero friends, if you don’t want that. If there is anything I can do for you please write anytime, this is a safe number. I hope you are doing fine.

With a deep sigh you turned around, turning on some music and closing your eyes. You felt every muscle in your body and yet you felt your consciousness roam the realms between wake and dream, those dangerous, wonderful lands between sweet nothingness and the nightmares that were already beginning to raise their ugly heads.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, i hope you haven't given up on the story yet.   
> I'll try to deliver a little more regularly - it's been a lot going on on my side of the screen, but i missed this.  
> To be honest it was your comments that got me to sit down and try again, so yeah - seeing there was still interest after such a break... It's kind of incredible, to know there is someone out there actually reading this, awesome in it's own way, but yeah, thank you guys, without you i wouldn't have gotten over the first few chapters.


	34. Chapter 34

_Hawks perspective:_

It had been a month.  
The longest month of his life.  
His signature smile had frozen, even his colleagues had noticed something was wrong – but what difference would hiding it make?  
A young woman, with recognizable features as dark wings and no prior experience going underground would not just disappear without a trace – maybe she had help – another hero, maybe a lover, maybe she allied with an enemy of his, maybe she was kidnapped by some villains – he prayed it was something like that. But it seemed unlikely. All her friends were young heroes he had kept a close eye on in the past month, read through their banking details, their texts, and their e-mails – nothing. Not a trace. And there had been no request for any hostage payment either.  
Instead the total silence had him fear one conclusion.

Trying to ignore the growing knowledge he forbade himself the thought. And yet, every unknown caller could be the morgue, calling for identification, or the police commissioner, wanting to break it to him personally – and even when it was not, his tension was only suspended, not relieved.

There was no trace of her – if she was alive she would have slipped up, he knew it, if she was alive he would have found her by now – he was only waiting for the call informing him.  
  
Maybe it would make things easier to know – he already knew, in a way, wasn’t he sure of it by now?  
Knowing how might help him to assess whether he would be able to live on – whether it had been his fault – though deep down he knew the answer to that as well.

_Your perspective:_   
  


Day 35:  
  


Staring up you watched the shadows move over the ceiling every time a car drove by, the headlights wandering over the wallpaper, despite the blinds being closed. The training had exhausted you, every muscle in your body hurt and yet you could not find any sleep. No matter how much you tried to exhaust yourself, tried not to think about where you were and what you were doing, to harden yourself against these feelings…  
Staying entirely still you tried to focus on the darkness around, emptiness was all you craved right now. Solace, the kind found in dreamless sleep, quiet - but even that seemed asked too much.

When thoughts began to stir again, you got up, slipping out into the dark corridor. Bare feet on dirty tiles, there was little to go by to find your way as no windows allowed the streetlights to illuminate your path, but you knew this place by now and at the end of the hallway you pushed a heavy door open. Moonlight fell through the skylights that were the only opening in the great training hall. Picking a sandbag, one of the heavy black leather ones that Jin liked working on relentlessly, you began with a series of kicks, switching to punches – when you had first arrived here your hits were hardly enough to make the heavy bags move – they weighed more than you. But with regular eating your strength had returned and you had never before trained as relentlessly. You had worked yourself into a new high when a sudden touch ripped you out of your own mind.

“Didn’t have enough, huh?” you did not have to turn around to identify the speaker. “I can be of service, if you really wanna work on that abysmal close combat skill of yours. But I won’t promise to hold back. Can you handle some more bruises-“ Dabi was cut off having to jump back when you turned against him with a vicious attack.

With a chuckle he assumed a fighting pose, blocking your next punch. You had a rather Americanised fighting style that you had learned with Hawks, classical kickboxing with a brutal strength and speed, while Dabi followed more classic japanese martial arts forms, broken only with the type of vicious, cruel move he must have picked up during street fights. With an elegant gesture he used the energy of your own punch to throw you – not expecting your mobility in the air, which allowed you to lift him with you, two meters, three, four, before slamming him into the ground with all your power. But before you could withdraw the villain had caught your arm and, while keeping you in reach, humbled you with a kick to the head, throwing you down. Already Dabi was upon you, but you were not ready to give up without a fight.  
Doing your best to counter every attack, match each hit despite him never allowing you to even graze him.  
A kick to the stomach sent you down, but you tried to get up again – he knocked you down, slamming you into the wall with a lazy hit – you could see them coming but your body was too heavy to avoid them, no matter how much you tried to push yourself further.  
Your lungs burned for air, but you tried to keep up, channelling all your desperation into every attempt, every counterattack and failed block, struggling despite knowing that you had lost – the only noise filling the training hall was the breathing, his controlled and in accordance with his martial arts technique, yours impulsive, angry, a fight for oxygen and the strength to go on –

“You lost. Why don’t you give up?” His attacks had long stalled to a slower speed, the fight was over but you did not stop, fighting on like a cornered animal.

“Hey! Pull yourself together. It’s over-“ but you could not let off, despite each of your hits being easily blocked, despite knowing that each time your attack was getting weaker –

Dabi was only defending now, brushing your attempts off like they were nothing. “Stop it, you are exhausted, your body needs a break, this is ridiculous.” His tone was factual, but kinder than usual.

When you did not react he closed in and a lot of things happened at once – suddenly dangling over the villains shoulder you thrashed around. “Let me down! Let me-“

But you got no answer, before getting carried out of the training hall, down the dark corridor. One of your hits caught him right where the kidneys should sit, but as you had noticed to often the villain had an incredible tolerance to pain, not betraying any emotion.

When you were thrown onto a mattress you panicked even more but despite your feral state one hand was enough to hold your wrists and prevent you from further mistreating him. You felt so powerless, so exhausted, your muscles heavy and aching from days of relentless training where you had pushed yourself until you could not stand in the shower anymore.

“This is so you don’t hurt yourself. I get it, you are angry, but with the current way you are living you won’t achieve much besides a nervous breakdown.”

Dabi went on, ignoring your weak resistance and attempts to fight him. “I don’t know what’s going on with you, though I have some ideas – but I do know that in this state you won’t be of any use to us. Do you think you’ll win against Hawks like this? Do you think that losing your cool, losing yourself like this will achieve anything? You’re acting like a child, hell, you basically still _are_ one, but if you want to have any chance against him…”

By now you were listening, sitting still on the mattress you had been thrown onto.

“You gotta get a hold of those feelings. Grow up, and fast. Take responsibility for your actions, _think_ instead of whatever it is you’ve been doing until now. Get better, faster, gain _control_.” Now you could see something like a faint smile. “Luckily for you I know a thing or two about control – hard earned lessons, trust me-“ there was sudden sadness when he said that, turquoise eyes wandering down to his own burned hands. You understood.

“Teach me.” The words have left your lips before you could think much.

There was something like surprise on the scarred face, giving him something of a boyish look. Maybe that wasn’t how things usually went in villain circles. For a moment you considered how ironic it was, having spent your life assuming to follow the footsteps of Hawks, only to finally ask his nemesis to mentor you – but you had little time to dwell on that, as Dabi told you to sit up.

“If you want to win, you have to be colder, know yourself better, there can be no dark corner you haven’t seen in your own mind. If you confronted it all before, every fear, wish and reluctance – only then will it not impede you in battle. Make sure he can’t surprise you, make sure he can’t hurt you. Train harder, change your ways – you still imitate his style. How do you want to beat someone while you still copy them – you still look up to him. No, don’t look away, don’t deny it – how do you ever want to overcome something if you can’t even admit it?”

The thought terrified you. Terrified you, left you feel caught and naked. Yes, you still admired him. Hawks had been the sun to you, shining brighter than anyone else. You had wanted to come close to that ideal, be a moon satisfied by reflecting a little of his light, bathe in that glow – and it had only felt like a natural consequence to be burned in the process. You had fought, you had tried to face off against him, but your admiration for him had still whispered into your ear and told you that it was hopeless. For the first time you wondered if there had been no other way – if you could not have revealed him to the public, or told your friends about his threats – it still felt impossible, stupid… but back then you had not even considered such options. He had simply seemed all powerful.

Slowly you nodded. “I see what you mean. What will be the next step of my training then?”

The villain laughed. It was different from any sound you had heard from him before, there seemed to be no danger lurking behind his smile for once, only amusement.

“The next step is for you to eat and sleep. You gotta take care of yourself – a real pro can’t afford to treat their body like this, how are you supposed to focus, to outlast your opponent if you can hardly stand from what you put yourself through? Your exhaustion will catch up to you soon, I promise you. Then, we will start training you properly. You will examine your own mind and train with the other League members, there is a lot to learn when you are open to see the strength in each different style. Learn from them and find what fits you. You will get to know yourself, you will face who you are – knowing your own weaknesses is as important as knowing your strengths and it is something you have been less than sufficient at in the past. Same as your old mentor – self-reflection never was his strong suit, so I am not surprised you never learned it. But for now you will stay here while I get you something to eat.”

Day 40:

_“And you really think I could become a hero like you?” The scrawny teen girl looked up at the blond man from under a mane of unkempt, windblown hair. The smile that answered was cheeky and confident._

_“Well, now that you ask it that way…” he pretended to reconsider._

_“Heey!!” she jumped up agitated. “I’m gonna prove you! Once I’m done they’ll all be asking Hawks who? I’ll be stronger and faster than you, and the whole rest of them too!” the determined look on her face finally cracked the hero up and chuckling he reached out and fuzzed over her hair._

_“Big words, shorty. I guess I’ll have to take you on and train you then, if only to keep an eye on you. What do you say, troublemaker?”_

_She tried to look unimpressed but a pair of excitedly fluttering wings gave her away._

_“’Kay, that’s decided then. Race to the river? Loser’s a lame duck! Hey – you can’t hold on to my leg- That’s not how the rules-“_

_“No rules in a street race!” the youngster shouted, pulling past him, running across the wall of a house while taking on speed and then taking a dive –_

_“You’re suicidal, kiddo! And don’t even think you can beat me with those dirty tricks!” but the laughter in his voice betrayed how much he was actually enjoying himself._

_The sky was grey and the first raindrops met the two figures speeding through the streets – but they could not care less about the rain, or the wind taking up. The sky was theirs and with mad laughter they made their way wild through the city._

When you woke up you kept your eyes closed, hoping to hold on to the feeling for just a little longer. Something wet was running down your cheek, soaking into your pillow. For a moment you could swear you felt the warmth of his hand holding yours, pulling you with him, wild into the action, as he always did – A sob broke lose. Rolling into a tight little ball, knees pressed against your torso, as if that could stop the pain in your chest.

It was painful, but there was also relief in those sobs, catharsis. You were grieving for the person you had once loved the most.


	35. Chapter 35

Day 44:  
  
Shigaraki was positively terrifying.   
“Give me a very good reason not to just kill Hawks hatchling and throw her body in front of his feet.”  
Dabi faced the fierce glance of the mad eyes, meeting them with cool composure and his usual cocky attitude, though he seemed tense.  
“She helped us in a previous attack, she proved her usefulness. Toga and I are training her hard – it will be useful to have our own pair of wings.” He reported back. _Our own pair of wings_ – the wording made you feel sick. You shouldn’t be so sensitive – it in no way should come as a surprise that that was how they saw you and yet…  
“Do you think I am stupid?” it was a vicious snarl. “I allowed you this pet project – for I understand your wish for personal vengeance, truly. But do not deceive yourself believing she is loyal to our cause or even to you.”  
You dared not open your mouth in protest, only glaring hatefully up at the Leagues leader. Shigaraki was not an imposing figure by hero standards- he did not have the build of an Endeavor, nor the room filling presence commanding attention Katsuki had. The thought had snuck up on you, the memory of your former love cutting through you. What would he do if he stood here in your place? Take Shigaraki out and end it once and for all, even if it would cost his life, you knew at once.  
Well, you were no Katsuki.  
Instead you looked at your feet in the tightly laced training boots, trying to force yourself to remain calm.  
What he was lacking in stature Shigaraki made good on in his aura – upon entering his lair you had felt the tension in the air. It was not because of the disturbing hands that were stored on the walls in his room, nor his mad face… something in the way he moved, erratic and unpredictable, yet quick and sharp… It unsettled you. There was something unnatural about this man.   
“I would like to keep training her and give her a chance to prove her value. I understand you were upset she had taken to seeing the prisoner – but as she did not do anything to free him and we have not prohibited her from speaking to him, I see no reason to punish her.”  
Shigaraki sighed at Dabi’s defence, suddenly seeming rather bored. His mood swings were what scared you most about him – utterly incalculable. “Fine. I’ll leave you your plaything, as long as she is of use to the League. Let her take care of her little friend, but the moment she tries to free him or runs back to her hero friends I will have you hunt her down and gut her yourself.”  
Dabi bears the criticism silently, defending neither himself nor you any more. He only nods and leads you out of the room.

Shaking from suppressed anger and fear you make your way to your own room. Fingers wrap around your wrist, pulling you back roughly.   
“Hey-“ but your protest is stifled by Dabi’s severe expression.  
“You utter and complete idiot!” his accusation surprised you, only a moment ago he had been so composed. “You had to go and see him, didn’t you – did you even think for just a moment how that would look?! Don’t expect me to put out my neck for you like that again, quite frankly you didn’t deserve it-“ you saw his turquoise eyes but it was not anger that spoke out of them, it was concern.  
“You worry for me.”   
For a moment he seemed speechless, then he let go of your arm, slowly, as if waking up from a bad dream.  
That made you smile. “Thank you for standing up for me. And I’m sorry, I see now you risked a lot trying to- “ well, to what actually? You had thought you were an instrumental part of his plan to defeat Hawks and maybe you were, but with it being such a long-shot and his genuine seeming care you could not help but think that it somehow also had to do with you. “to train me.” You ended rather lamely. “But Shinsou is somewhat of a friend – and I did not try to free him, I just did not want to let him go mad there alone in his cell –“  
Dabi’s expression softened a bit. “You really are an idiot, aren’t you?” but his tone was softer now.  
“Friends are friends, even if they are on the other side, even if they hate you for your choices.”  
“So you’d come visit me in prison when you go back to your hero friends and I get caught one day, huh?” his sardonically raised eyebrow made you grin.   
“Of course I will-“ You could have swallowed your tongue. “Not that I would switch sides.” You added.  
“Of course.” He answered. That was it – you had betrayed a desire you had not even admitted to yourself until now – but he did not say anything more. Side by side you made your way out of Shigarakis lair, through the backdoor and into a waiting car that would bring you back to the headquarter. Autumn was in the air and a clear blue sky welcomed you, though it was much colder than it looked.   
It was not long before Dabi had lit a cigarette and was blowing smoke out into the car.   
_Would you come visit me when you go back to your hero friends and I get caught?_  
“So that means we’re friends, huh?” you asked.   
As an answer he blew a cloud of smoke at you, making you cough. “Gross!”  
He chuckled, seemingly rather satisfied with himself. In the end you decided not to ask again.  
  
  
  
  
  


Day 51:

Training was most of your day by now, that and small surveillance jobs for the League, but the best part of your life was when you stood in the kitchen at the end of the day. That end of the day might be midnight or morning – with your nocturnal missions you had, like most members, a less than normal sleeping rhythm. In the evening you were checking out the groceries Twice or Toga had brought, telling them off for forgetting ingredients while they ignored you – she playing on her phone and him silently glaring at you over a cigarette. With time your little gatherings had even attracted Dabi and, though only occasionally, the quiet shadow you knew as Kurogiri.

While cooking you were in your element, ordering bystanders to help with the cutting and delightedly sighing when breathing in the spicy smell of whatever was currently simmering.

You brought Shinsou some of your food every time after the others fled the kitchen so you would not implore them to help with the dishes. If someone had noticed they had not mentioned it – usually nobody cared much what the others did in their time off. The conversations you had with their prisoner whenever the others were not around were beginning to fill a notebook, which you kept well hidden. Sometimes he drew you a scene from memory and you described to him what was going on outside, hoping to help him keep his sanity until you could find a way to help him out here. You had looked into how exactly his cell was secured – just in case. Sometimes you just came to tell him what was on the news, how his friends – _his_ because you doubted they still considered you one of them – were doing.

Other times you came because you needed someone to talk to who had known the past you. You never spoke of what had brought you to switch sides, but his presence and the fact that he knew those you missed more than anything else were enough to console you most of the time. And when that was not enough, when the pain of your injuries, the aching muscles and aching heart became too much to bear, you would lean against the metal door and feel the warmth of his hand holding yours.

Day 78:

You realized what made Toga so dangerous – she was not scared, she just enjoyed the fight, surprising her enemies with unpredictable attacks. And she never panicked, treating it as a game, even if her life was on the line.

The girl was speeding towards you, just like Dabi she managed to force you into a defensive position, though their styles could not have been more different. She was unpredictable, playful, yet violent, less elegant and a lot more stabby –

You ducked away from a throwing knife but let out a pained scream as it stuck in your wing.

“Such a nice big target” she giggled. Toga had taken to treating you as a friend, but that did not stop her from injuring you when she caught you slipping up in training.

Immobilized like this you only had close combat left, without flying there was no way to avoid it – she had overwhelmed you within seconds and you cursed, calling for Twice to end the fight before you had to take more abuse from her.

Day 89:

The measuring tape wrapped around your waist you looked up at bull of a man looking down at you. Jin was a quiet one, he had not made a single comment while measuring you. In a way you were still a bit scared of him – not in this state, but when he was Twice and wore his mask he might be one of the most dangerous members of the League – and his other side did not trust you.

“I feel like at a fitting for a new costume” you grinned up at the blonde man, trying to swallow your worry and instead make friends – soon you would have to face him in training and it would not hurt to have a good relationship then.  
“Shoe size?” he only asked in response.   
You gave him the information. “Is the copy going to be as fast as me?”  
“Yes. But they can’t take too many hits before you’ll need me to replace them.”  
Excited you shuffled your feet over the floor.   
“I won’t get this right if you keep moving!”  
“Sorry” you gave him a sheepish grin.  
“Is it silly that I’m nervous?”  
Jin only hummed an answer. It had been too long since you faced another flying opponent.

Day 90:  
 **Your hand is bandaged. Did anything happen?**  
You read the scribbled sentence when the open note pad was handed back through the slit in the calls door.  
“No, all good. I started training against flying opponents, copies of myself but 2 v 1 was a bit much for me and Jin refused to call them back, saying that wouldn’t be an option in a real fight either…He’s right of course, I just have to get better…” you handed the note pad back – you had started with a diary, but that was long filled and now you just used whatever paper you could get your hands on.  
 **You speak of them like friends. Did you forget who they are? What they do to people?  
** “No…no that’s not it – I just…I have something to do and they help me, they train me for it. I know they are not good people, I see how they treat you, but…”  
Impatient fingers pulled the paper back inside, he scribbled angrily.  
 **You sound like you are justifying this. Why would you chose their side over ours? I just can’t understand it.  
** That hurt. “Well, you’re right, you can’t understand it. And it makes no difference to tell you – you won’t understand, you don’t have to forgive me. I never asked for your forgiveness – “ by now you were defensive, you knew it was unfair to lash out at Shinsou but the world simply wasn’t fair, had it been fair to you?! “But your side isn’t so perfect either – and it’s not like they care, as long as someone has the influence and power –“ you swallowed sharply. “Doesn’t matter. I’m not asking you to think well of me, I just came to bring you food and ask if you need anything.” You handed him a tray through the opening. “The things are covered, because I know your muzzle won’t open for another hour. I hope you’ll like it.”   
Decidely you turned to leave. Behind you there was a loud flap, the noise of the note pad hitting the floor. It was not fair to ignore him after his voice had already been taken.   
So you turned and picked it up.  
 **Wait  
** “I’ll come back later, if that’s ok. I’m a bit upset and should gather myself.” Dutifully you handed back the paper, to wait for his farewell. It only seemed right – they had taken enough of his agency, it was only right to treat him with respect where you could.  
 **Ok. But we should talk about this. Maybe I won’t understand but it might help to know – I rely on you a lot, don’t you think I should know what kind of person you are?  
** “You’re quite judgemental for someone who relies on me for his care.” You said grimly, but then sighed. “Fine, you’re right. One friend to another. Give me some time to consider how much I want to tell you, ok? I’ll go now, knock once if that is ok and twice if I should leave you the note pad.”  
Two knocks and you handed it back. Sometimes he liked to doodle, or write down memories he was scared to forget. Another knock told you that it now was fine for you to leave.   
  
  
  
  


In the end it was hours later that you returned to Shinsou’s cell.   
“Sorry.” You murmured. “Took me a while.” It had seemed impossible to talk about everything, so instead you had written down a brief summary – a very brief one to be honest, that you had ripped up and rewritten about half a dozen times. With all the emotions stirred up by it you had taken a break to train and let out some steam, bugging Jin to give you a copy of yourself to train with and later Dabi had joined, watching for a few minutes and correcting your technique before demonstrating how to do it better and vanishing the copy to take over. He had kindly refrained from close combat, as your right hand and arm were still recovering. Instead you had avoided thrown objects in between burst of flame, training your agility and reflexes.  
You dropped the little note in Shinsou’s cell, together with two chocolate bars. “As an apology for coming so late and leaving right away – it’s not really a subject I enjoy talking about. I’d appreciate you destroy the note after reading it, as this is just between you and me.”

Day 103:

“Do you miss your life from before?” the question caught you by surprise. Interrupting the trained cuts you were carrying out on the beef in front of you, you looked up.  
Jin’s pale gaze slid over you before he looked down on the kitchen table, taking up his sake cup.

“Depends on when. How ‘bout you?”

“Nah, my life was a shit show. But you had it all, shorty. Fame, fortune, the job, the guy – must’ve gone mad as Toga giving that up over some angry headlines.” _Mad as Toga, huh?_ Well, knowing her better you could understand why that had become a proverb in the right circles - she was quite the overachiever, as far as crazy went. And fighting – you still carried the scars you had gotten curtesy of your new friend.

“I had it all? Well, I guess that’s what it looked like from the outside. Hey, if you wanna smoke do that outside, I’m cooking here.”

He let his hand sink and put the cigarette back into the package. “Bad habit.” Another long, thoughtful look, but you already turned away, taking up your knife again.

“How was your childhood?” the question surprised you – this was surly not his first cup of sake, or he wouldn’t be so talkative.

“Are you writing a book?” you shot back, earning a dry chuckle from him. “How was yours?” It had only been you posing back the question as a form of refusing to answer, but after a brief moment of silence he actually began to speak again.

“My father drank. My mother worked hard, trying to make it a normal home but once he came back home that was usually over. She was disappointed when I took after him, skipping school and getting into trouble. My quirk seemed made for it, ya know?”

That certainly did not explain his second personality or why he became a villain, yet it felt rather personal.

“So how ‘bout you?” he pulled out his cigarette again and this time you did not tell him to stop, instead watching him light up. “Regrets?”

“A bunch. I was weak – didn’t trust my friends when I should have. Didn’t speak up when I should have, too scared what might happen. When I finally did I thought I could suffer the consequences alone and didn’t need help.” You caught yourself trailing off. “Yeah. Certainly I got regrets. Left a lot behind, things I didn’t understand the value of back then.” You swallowed and then turned to the stove again, throwing the cut meat into the sizzling hot pot. “But regret and guilt don’t help me sort out this mess. First I need to fix what I couldn’t back then. When that’s out of the way…I guess I’ll see what’s left for me then.”

With a grim look on your face you stirred the meal, enjoying the fizzing and sizzling that was just as you felt yourself.

“Sounds like you’re growing up, darlin’” at the sound of Dabi’s voice you looked up in surprise but there he stood, leaning in the doorway. “But I should warn you. After some time on our side there usually isn’t much left to return too. Not to mention Shigaraki is no fan of letting members go. So, what’s cooking?” he entered, falling down on a chair next to twice and taking the untouched sake cup Twice had poured you earlier. “Yours?” he asked. A nod from you in response, then he took a sip.

“Gyudon, you want yours with sake or egg yolk? Oh why do I even ask, you already hold the bottle.”

These shared meals had become something of a tradition in your time here and slowly the kitchen that had been so abandoned when you had arrived was becoming a gathering spot. You always cooked and had explained the habit to Dabi as a need to stay healthy and eat well with your training but it was other reasons that brought you here.   
Cooking was something you had learned from Katsuki, in endless laughter filled evenings in your tiny kitchen. He had let you smell the spices with closed eyes, letting you guess which it was and laughing when you had to inevitably sneeze. Back then you had not thought about what it meant to you that he appeared punctual every evening with a bag of groceries, teaching you how to cut lotus root so it would look pretty in your noodle soup and making you slice the beef even thinner, calling you a bad, lazy chef between kisses. Katsuki had been the first to teach you to take care of yourself and that had been at the heart of your relationship. And now it was time for you to be an adult, to take care of things yourself. You knew he would not forgive you for attacking and leaving him, for fighting on the wrong side, it was asking too much, but that would not stop you from treasuring what he had given you.

That’s where he had always been different from Keigo. Katsuki wanted you to be independent and supported you to be just that.

“Any reason you’re grinning at our food?” Twice voice ripped you out of your thoughts.

“I just really like Gyudon. Cooking always makes me happy.”


	36. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there everybody, a little added note.  
> There will not be more than a few more chapters to come and i want to take my time working and reworking them until i am pleased with the result, so updates might take a little time again - though i am working on the story quite a lot, i promise ;)
> 
> I thought about trying something new in between, that would take less time to write, some kind of one shot for example, if there is interest for something like that - someone asked about more Reader/Hawks before, others seem to have taken a liking to Dabi, or maybe a small background chapter from before the beginning of the story?  
> If you would like to read something like that i'd love to hear back from you about it, i was considering it since a while and thought now might be a good time.  
> First one shot: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27866678 (Pretty Bird Holiday one shot, Dabi and Birdy bonding time)  
> Second one shot: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28192974/chapters/69083724 (Pretty Bird Holiday Smut, Hawks/Birdy)
> 
> Thank you so much for the comments and the interest, you can't believe how much fun it is with you guys!

Day 135:

You laughed, dodging the lower temperature flames Dabi sent into your direction. Running vertically past the wall of the training hall you avoided his attacks and then, in one quick motion used the surface under your feet to jump from and a quick beat of your wings to shoot towards him – such a direct engagement made him stumble out of the way, but already you rolled back onto your feet, not a second out of motion, taking off before he could even engage you in hand-to-hand combat and instead jumping between columns, hiding from his attacks like a child. With your playful hide and seek game he had lost you out of sight and you waited for him to turn his back before noiselessly dropping behind him. “Peekaboo”

Dabi spins, responding with punch on chest height – but you had already ducked, instead sliding into a low kick and throwing him off balance. When he catches himself again you are back in the air, flying a somersault around one of his blue bursts.  
It reminded you of when you had learned to fly, around nine or ten years old when your wings were grown large enough to carry your weight –  
Down under you your opponent kept shooting flames at you but you were content avoiding them for now, taunting him with pretend attacks, keeping him on his toes. You swirled up higher into the hall, up into the darkness under the high ceiling. There you escaped Dabi’s gaze for a moment, unsettled and waiting for your attack. Like a bat you hung up there, watching.  
Watching Kuogiri you had learned that, let the enemy exhaust himself, searching, worrying, while you wait in the dark for a chance to strike. Again he tried to light up the room with an enormous blaze – using the chance as he blinded himself against your faint movements in the shadows you let go, falling before landing softly with quiet swings of your wings, undetectable over the roaring flames. When Dabi noticed the movement in the corner of his eye you already were close. A wall of fire to keep you away, but Toga could have jumped this even without wings – and so you did. He greeted you with an attack, forcing you back – probing at his defences you went on,, dancing away from his attacks. Another attempt – but he feigned a fire blast, then giving you a kick – enough to throw you back but catlike you landed on your feet.  
His eyes met yours, trying to calculate your next movement -  
  
Loud clapping made you both swirl around. The applause was slow, echoing in the large hall.  
“I see your protégé is ready.” It should be a compliment, but from Shigaraki’s lips it came off between bored and an ‘it’s about time’.

“I wouldn’t say so-“ Dabi began, giving you a challenging look and causing you to slide back into a fighting stance with a wide grin.

With a vicious glint in his eyes he jumped to attack, engulfing your attention in the fight again. When you looked to where Shigaraki had stood before he was gone.  
  
But later when you stood in the shower his words came back to you. Now you were here over four months – Shigaraki thought you were ready – but were you?  
For a moment you closed your eyes and imagined Keigo’s face. A strange hollow feeling in your chest took hold. _No, I’m not ready. If I met him now I would have no idea what to do. I can’t face the past. I can’t go back._  
Instead you focused on the forward. This was reason to be proud – with your hair wrapped in a towel and now dressed in fresh clothes you went down in the kitchen.  
From the out of the cupboard you took a little drinking cup, filling it from the bottle Twice must have left on the table. The alcohol burned on your tongue – you had not drank in a long time you suddenly realized. But today there was something to celebrate.  
“To kicking Dabi’s ass” you emptied the cup.  
There was a chuckle behind you, you turned, sure to find Dabi leaned against the door frame but instead you were met by a pair of red eyes and Shigaraki’s unnervingly pale face.  
“A little hasty, wasn’t it?” but his one was smooth, almost friendly.  
“Maybe, but it’s the closest I have gotten yet.”  
The villain sat down on the kitchen table. Usually he lived in his own lair and only came to communicate his plans – it was strange to see him sit at the table.  
He gestured at the cupboard and you offered him a cup, which he swiftly filled with sake.  
“Horrid stuff.”  
“I did not think you drank –“  
“I don’t” he answered, still making a grimace.

“Why do it then?”  
“It makes me more relatable.” He responded with an amused expression, as if he was letting you in on a secret.  
That was a new side…and more than a little unnerving.  
He filled your cup again and looked on encouragingly. “I heard you spend a lot of your time here, cooking.”  
Wondering what he wanted you replied carefully. “Good food is necessary to maintain your capabilities.” After a brief silence you added. “And I enjoy cooking.”  
“It’s good you have something that gives you such joy.” _This was unnatural. Why was he so nice?!_

After your careful nod and a stretched silence he spoke again. “I had no illusions about why you joined us. And where your true loyalties laid.”  
Fear rose in your chest but he went on. “But time has passed. You have proven more capable than I had expected. And more…adaptable.”  
You knew you this praise was nothing to be proud of, but you could not help but feel your spirits rise at to see your skill recognized.  
“And I saw you with Dabi – I think you could truly become one of us, if you chose it. I’ll admit I had always assumed that we would have to kill you the moment you slipped up and that it would be it…” There was no regret at that thought, only the cold report of it.  
“Yet-“ and now he gave you a smile. “Yet you defied my expectations. We are friends here – as close to it as people like us can get to that anyway. And I saw one of my most loyal friends return home with a broken little bird he had decided to fix. I never expected it would work of course, merely humouring his wish to salvage a hurt he had experienced himself.”  
Here he filled both of your cups again, finishing his in one sip and gesturing you to do the same. The alcohol made your head turn a bit, but he went on and you focused on his words.  
“But he managed to heal the little thing and it turned out to be a strong creature, with the will to live – there is no going back, and you know that as well as I do. But you seem to want to live, to fly free – and you could do that here. Stay. Be one of my League – you impressed me, little bird. You got the will. Here you could do it. You did not come looking for a future – but what if there is one? You could kill the man you hate so much – and then you could stay and fight all the self-righteous, cruel, arrogant men who want power over others, you have seen what heroes are – stay and help us show the rest of the world too.”  
His words had gone down together with your sake, but much smoother. Was he right? What else was left for you anyway?

“When did you start to think this?” you asked.  
“Seeing you two fight. You learned from everyone you trained with – I see Toga’s bendy, quick, acrobatic influences, Kurogiri’s patience. And Dabi’s aggressive style, not leaving the enemy a moment to breathe once you are there – Adapting, as I said. I wonder what you could learn from me.” Here he laughed. “I mean it. The weapon you could be forged into in the right hands…I no longer wonder about Dabi’s and Hawk’s choice. That trickster style, where did you pick that up?”  
“Someone long ago.” You did not feel like telling the villain about your childhood, did not want to share that that was _you_ – underhanded, mocking, always between a laugh and a wild dive – you as you had been, all on your own. Before anyone had tried to forge you.  
He took it the wrong way. “Don’t worry, you can mention your hero friends. That of course will be the real test.” With a sharp look he seemed to calculate your reaction. “But if I am honest, I think you belong here. I haven’t heard you make lofty speeches on honour – any of them would have tried to kill me if they thought they got a chance…No…You are no hero. You just wanted to be on the side of those you loved. But I warn you – they are not like that. They will fight you if they see you on our side. Give them up and you might yet have an intriguing future ahead of you.”  
With those words Shigaraki got up, leaving you at the table and to your thoughts.

  
  


  
  
  
  
Day 136:  
  
“So…you really only tried to get me to switch sides because you wanted my help taking down Hawks?” The moon stood high on the night sky already. A few nearby street lights illuminated the garden behind the head quarter, just enough that you could make out the scorched grass your earlier training had left. Next to you on the stone wall surrounding the area was your new mentor, nestling around with his cigarette package.  
“Of course. Why else?”  
“I don’t know. But it seems kind of a longshot – apart from you nobody seems to believe I have a chance anyway –“  
“Because they don’t know Keigo’s arrogance.” Dabi said grimly.  
“Sure. Though you knew a lot about why I had reason to hate him-“  
“That’s my job. Knowing stuff, finding allies, taking down my opponents-“  
“Sure, sure.” You smiled, before looking him right in the eyes. “But you also wanted to help me.”  
“Flattering ourselves, are we?”  
“Maybe. But I thought it through. It just doesn’t make sense. There are flying villains you could have recruited, frankly that would have been much faster.”  
“Well, I want to see him suffer-“  
“Oh come on! Are you so offended that I am implying you might have a heart?!”  
“An accusation I will deny until the day I die.” He grinned, flicking some ash of his now lit cigarette. “Fine. I thought you deserved a shot at revenge. I needed someone to pluck him out of the sky for me and well… Two birds, one stone, you know?” You did not dignify his pun with a response, instead taking your revenge with some mockery of your own.  
“Is this where you tell me about your undying love for me?” you offered.  
Dabi rolled his eyes. “No. I just couldn’t stand seeing it. Heroes abusing their power…trying to shape their legacy on the cost of another, while self-righteously telling themselves that what they are doing is justified-“ his voice was heavy with disgust.  
“Sounds like you’ve been there.”  
“A lifetime ago. It doesn’t matter. Just – I just don’t think it is right. Not that I usually care about that – maybe he just pissed me off and I wanted to see him hurt. I’m no hero. I didn’t come to save you, you don’t owe me anything. Remember I threatened you to come here? I’m just another ass using people for their own plans – and that’s the world, don’t go believing something else.”  
“I get it, a big dark cynic.”  
“I’m a villain.” His tone was intense, as if trying to make you understand something important.  
“Sure.” You ginned, pecking a kiss on his cheek and jumping down from the garden wall.  
There was an audibly exasperated sigh behind you before he followed suit. “Hopeless.” He grumbled, following you back inside the garden, where you had been training. Lately he had demanded you try and carry heavy loads while flying, arguing it would increase your usefulness tenfold to be able to evacuate and increase your allies movement speed. When you argued that you had done that in the past he only raised an eyebrow, asking how well that had gone.  
It was hard training, especially as he demanded you do things as swoop in to pick him up or carry him so that he could still attack with his quirk – you had dropped him more than once. That had gotten you into a world of trouble – despite the apparent growing friendship between you, Dabi was what you could only describe as petty, paying you back for each fall during combat training.  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Day 139:

Getting caught had not been part of the plan. “Get your ass out of there, right now. How far is it for you to our window?” you whispered aggressively into your mic.

“Too far.” Came the hushed answer back. Damned. Sneaking into a hero agency to get important mission papers had been a risky plan, but you had noticed a weakness in their alarm system, a window on the third floor with a cable that could be reached through a lose brick – and it took you only seconds to attach a separate cable so the flow would not be cut setting off the alarm when you opened the window. Instead you had gotten in soundlessly – and after a brief look around returned, carrying the lightest of your team mates – and the only one who was comfortable having you fly her up to the third floor.

The rest was her job – getting in, finding the information needed and getting out without running into the security or the two heroes on nightshift – but something had apparently gone wrong.  
You stood on the outside of the building, head to toe in dark grey, your chest pressed against the wall while your feet balanced on the centimetre wide ledge, three stories high and hoping not to be noticed from below.

“Get out there, now!” you hissed at your accomplice over the connection.

“They’re coming for my room, searching – there must have been an alarm we overlooked – help, now!”  
_Fuck – Fuck fuuck-_

“Coming.” You pulled yourself through the window, then to the door. Two broad backs just disappeared in a room at the end of the corridor. Clutching one hand around a brass knuckle you took up speed, a swing of your wings was enough, getting you to the door.

“Hands up!” you heard a voice shouting from inside.

“Incoming” you warned Toga, to make sure you would not enter into a hail of throwing knives – the door slammed open and you landed on the back of one of the guys, nothing but muscles – it took two proper blows to the head to knock him down, but at least he had not expected you. Frighteningly he was already beginning to stir just as fast as he had been to fall.

The other was even bigger, a half-dressed, red haired colossal mountain of muscles – _Oh God No!_ You kept your wings pressed to your back, while Toga was jumping back from the charging giant. He gave a grunt, bearing sharp teeth, red eyes following her jump through the room. Red Riot had changed agencies – and of fucking course it had to be the exact one storing the Anti-League mission plans on their servers.

You nodded towards the window as a grip around your ankle yanked you back – damn, that guy had been quick to recover. A kick to his face, then another – he groaned but his grip did not loosen. You could always knock him out with your purple feathers – but that was as good as leaving a calling card. No, this was gonna be all about close combat, ideally while hiding your wings as much as possible. The metal of your brass knuckles met his arm, then the side of his head as that got in reach –

“Birdy?” The voice behind you cut through the room. _Don’t answer._ Another punch and the hero on the ground let go, for just a moment, you pulled away, but between you and the window stood your former best friend, his hardened, sharp edged form deflecting Toga’s throwing knives while he stared at you.

“Can it be-“ he stepped in closer. You had to act, now. Running towards him you jumped, landing on a table before him, dancing out of his reach with a quick step back as he tried to catch you –

“Not a word to anyone, _trust me,_ please.” You jumped back once more, sure that only he could hear these words.

“What-“

“I was never here.” This time you got past him, Toga already waited at the window, opened wide, giving you a hand and pulling you close, through the air and out, then she jumped after – such trust – you caught her but took a steep dive, both arms wrapped around her torso. Steep, fast, little more than a swish in the air, before far enough from the building finally pulling up again, further, faster – in your arms you could hear her scream, you knew this must be too much but Hawks had taught you to trick outdoors cameras, if you were just fast enough you would be nothing more than a grey line to their lenses – on a roof just minutes away you stopped, setting her down.

“I am sorry I had to do that but-“

The air was pressed out of your lungs. Toga had jumped at you with a bear hug.

“That. Was. Awesome!” she almost squealed with excitement.

Surprise was written on your face before you managed to grin. “Let’s get back to the others and hope the boss won’t eat us alive for being caught.”

“Only if we do that again!”

_Kirishimas perspective:_

He did not know why he had gone along with it – describing the wings as leathery in his report, saying he was sure it had been a man – the hero who had taken her punches was just too ready to agree with that, despite having been healed by a quirk-doctor he would take a week off to make sure the severe concussion he was left with had no lasting consequences.

But Eijirou had recognized her clearly – **_Not a word to anyone._ **Anyone – that probably included Bakugou. Of course it did. She must have had a good reason not to tell them, some reason at least – unless she simply switched sides. It happened. Stain had been a hero, until he hadn’t. There were more, he knew that, but nobody liked to talk about them.

 **_Trust me._ ** _That’s a lot to ask, Birdy. That’s a whole lot to ask from someone, after you attack them side by side with a League member._

“What’s wrong, dude?” Kirishima looked up at that, meeting his best friend’s concerned eyes.

“Nothing. Thinking about a case.”

“Need help figuring something out? You look like you’re getting a headache.” Bakugou tried to grin but it looked tired. Lately he always looked tired.

**_I was never here._ **

“Nah dude, I’m good. You sure we shouldn’t just order? I know you’ve had a long day too.” They had never really discussed Eijirou moving into the spare bedroom in his friends flat, or cooking for him for the first months, kicking him out of bed in the morning and silently leaving food on the table when Bakugou returned late. There had been no need to discuss, it had been the only thing to do. Eijirou knew his friend had needed it – and he had needed something to focus on, the feeling that there was something he could do. Someone he wasn’t failing.

There was a lot they had not talked about. What had happened the evening Birdy and Shinsou had disappeared. What it meant that they had not heard from her since. What Bakugou was doing after work, almost every evening. But Eijirou had a pretty good idea. Once or twice the blonde had come back injured from a fight, but he had gotten smarter, not wearing his hero clothes when he was out, blending into shady places.

He did not know how Bakugou kept up hope. How he did not realize that their friend was gone, that if they met again, and that was a big if, it might be on opposing sides.

But when Kirishima had tried to tell him that he had only left the room, and returned hours later, sweaty with knuckles beaten bloody from training.

Katsuki did not give up, searching through the cities underbelly night after night, trying to catch word of her, sure that if he just found her everything would be well again – Eijirou was not sure whether to envy or pity him. Half a year had passed.

And now Eijirou _had_ found her – and she had smashed his colleagues head in, fled with Toga and told him to keep her secret – and he had.

 ** _Trust me._** The words rang in his ears once more.

Maybe he was just as crazy as his best friend.


	37. Chapter 37

_Toga’s perspective:_

The fluffy hood half obscured Toga’s vision as she was collecting the needed equipment in the armory. Carelessly she picked up a few knives and then begun with choosing a brand new needle for her straw – maybe she’d run into a tasty looking hero tonight, one never knew.  
Cute heroes or not, it would be a grand time.   
Shigaraki had planned a full attack in the center of the town, close to a government building they would wreck in the process, making the heroes look mighty stupid in front of the entire nation.   
Dabi had complained about it being little more than causing a lot of noise and maybe wrecking some central city and it had taken Shigaraki’s assurance that all the high profile goodies would run right into their arms trying to intervene. Toga had no such concerns, she was mainly excited to be fully let off the leash. While the others were discussing tactics and how they would use a highly mobile approach, air warnings of incoming heroes and a strategically chosen path to escape capture she was daydreaming of the havoc she would wreck.

When the others finally began to arm themselves as well for the mission she looked up, armed to the teeth with a selection of different blades tucked into her winter coat.

“Aw, too bad you guys aren’t sticking with us! We always have so much fun together!” She blew a kiss towards the newbie, seeing the bird-girl nervously grin back while Dabi tested their set of radio equipment. “You’ll miss out on all the action on the ground…It will be a slaughter fest! But we can tell stories afterwards, you planned on a curry for tonight, right Wings?”   
It took the new girl a moment to react to the nickname, but Toga wouldn’t let such minor details discourage her. This was the closest she had been in years to having a female best friend and she wouldn’t miss that chance. And friends called each other by nicknames – she was majorly disappointed not to have earned one for herself yet. _Patience_ , she reminded herself. _Don’t scare her off, a few more weeks of friendly interaction and you’ll have the villain gal-pal you always dreamed of._

“Yes, I asked Jin to get the red paste for it that you like so much, it’s gonna be a feast” Wings tried to sound cheerful but something was a little off about her tone. Toga decided not to pay it much mind – maybe the girl was just sad to be excluded from the main group tonight. Flying above and helping to coordinate and with mobility sounded like a real drag.

“Oh don’t let the air-duty get you down, I’ll bring you something nice!” Toga offered her newest friend a toothy grin. Maybe a hero’s weapon, or a nice decapitated-  
“Toga, we’re waiting!” Jin was calling from upstairs.  
“Coooming!” she hugged the bird-girl, tried to do the same with Dabi – he stopped her by the forehead, arm stretched out.  
“Big old meanie. See ya later, guys!”

And with that she skipped up the stairs. Tonight would be a fucking blast – and after that, there would be curry waiting and maybe a glass of Dabi’s good whisky.

Toga grinned to herself.

It was a shame Wings and Dabi wouldn’t really be in on the action tonight, but at least Toga and her team would take six Nomu – a small army, enough to tear this entire city a new one! This would be a world of fun – “Hell yes” she called out, joining her team.

_Hawks perspective:_

Sometimes he struggled remembering the reason. A long gaze up into the clear evening sky, seeing just the smallest puff of white rising, a cloud of breath in the winter air. The smallest proof of him still being a breathing, living being. He could have sworn he was a ghost. A bright winter sun wandered into her evening decline.

Perched up on the city’s tallest building he sat, accompanied only by the cold winds that tore at his clothes and hair. In the past he had come here to be alone… That was not necessary anymore. His loneliness followed wherever he went.

Feet hanging into the empty air, over the edge of the building. There was something amusing about that. _My feet find no ground, I am lost in space_ – he took out a small metal box, taking out a tiny white pill. Fingers frozen numb from the cold the little thing laid on the palm of his hand.

Keigo had never liked the significance people attributed to their own problems. He had never been one to take life overly serious, but now it was more than that. Sometimes he struggled to remember the reasons that had driven him in the past at all.

People went around all their life, wanting this and that, running after their goals.   
On the horizon he saw the big glowing eye of the sky dip their first toe into the darkness that awaited her behind the edge of the world.

For a moment he fought the impulse to follow. It would be a nice end to a story, to disappear into the sun, leaving the world to itself.

That was when his phone went off – he took the call, while nestling the pill back into the tiny metal box. A call to action, an attack at the city – he took off.

Sometimes he struggled to remember the reason he ever became a hero. But he did his job all the same.

_Kirishimas perspective:_

It was cold, the air seemed like frozen.

Kirishima was cursing. “Where are the other heroes? We need areal information, and more fighters-“ but it was a fruitless complaint. He desperately hoped for backup - but the truth was that the others were busy too. Evacuating, fighting the roaming League members – he himself was currently occupied by serving as a punching bag, a living barrier between a wild Nomu and two civilians who should really, _really_ be airlifted out of here.  
The road was blocked by the burning ruin of a fallen building and had turned into a death trap for anyone fleeing the fights in the city center this way. Kirishima had followed the blonde school girl type here, before she disappeared in a cloud of black mist, Kurogiri, the warp gate villain.   
And before he had managed to turn around a heavy fist had almost hammered him into the ground.

“Need backup, now –“ he grunted into his mic, as another forceful hit slammed into him. He would not be able to bear this much longer. Not only did the monster fight with supernatural strength and speed, it also beat any human opponent he had yet faced when it came to endurance.   
The creature tried to feint an attack, trying to catch him off guard – one moment would be enough – he dodged the upright punch the best tried to land, then caught the follow-up with his own hand.  
“Don’t worry-“ he called out to the two civilians behind him, who were petrified under the bloodthirsty gaze of the beast.  
A brutal fist met his hardened chest, he dug into his stance, refusing to be thrown out of the way, despite the force of a speeding train slamming into his chest.  
Skin cracked, yet he hardly felt the wound, his entire body still vibrating with the hit he had taken. A cloud of white breath left his mouth and for a second he felt as though his soul had been punched out of him too-

Another attack, the vicious beast digging its teeth into him – one broke skin. Kirishima swore.

“Please Red Riot, please stay strong-“ the one of the people he was protecting had found their voices again.

“I’m gonna hit back – and you two run, ok?” he almost growled, teeth bared in a pained grimasse. “Now!”

In a desperate fit of blind fury he jumped at the Nomu with everything he had. _Just buy them time, just a little time_ – there was a sound of shuffling steps behind him. The Nomu caught him and slammed him back, into the wall of a building, shattering the structure around them. Bricks rained down onto the two opponents.   
_How could these beasts be so strong?!_ Again he tried to strengthen his quirk but there was no change – it already took all his strength to resist the current attack and his opponent did not seem injured or even exhausted.

Curses.

Teeth dug into his arm. This time he felt something ripping – then there was red – crimson red.

_I have to go on. As long as I keep the beast, it can’t hurt anyone else._

Adrenaline pumped through his body, numbing the pain. _Just a little longer._

_Bakugous perspective:_

_Where the fuck was Hawks the one time they needed the bastard?!_ The inner city underneath was nothing but chaos. Blasts catapulted him through the air. Where, where –

Underneath people running, one man pulling the other after him. They would make it out. No need to – _There!_

The roaring of the creature drew him in and underneath he saw two large dark figures facing off on a riverbank, dust of a destroyed storage shed was dancing in the winter air, obscuring the fighters – Bakugou went in. Dropping between them he landed in front of an injured hero, blasting the monster back. He was right at it again, a jump, quick, both of his hands pressing against the side of its head – the explosion threw him back. It had taken his reserves, and devoid of more nitro sweat he had no way to catch himself in the air, hurled half a dozen meters through the air before landing on the asphalt, rolling off the landing. The creature’s body dropped, a gory mess, its head blown off straight.

Katsuki helped the other man up. The large black shadow turned out to have been a familiar whale headed hero.

“Backup - now –“ he heard the broken words over his earpiece. The voice was familiar. _Fuck!_

“Red Riot is in trouble!” With that he was back in the air, just closely avoiding to torch Gang Orka as he was getting to his feet. _They needed more eyes in the sky, evacuation – where the fuck was the goddamn winged bastard?_

“Riot? Red Riot?!” No response, the streets underneath were torn open, decayed, the city torn apart. “Where are you?!” he shouted into his mic, but there was no answer. He would have to find his best friend and fast.

_Your perspective:_

The city underneath was a black sea, street lanterns and lit windows as lost speckles of gold that someone had dropped into this painting of grey and blue and black – but there was more to it, there at the horizon was the unmistakable red shimmer of fire, the stars invisible behind a veil of smoke.  
The roof you were perched up on belonged to a bank, an ugly modern monstrosity of glass and metal cutting into the sky with its 23 stories. Up here the sounds of the battles in the city underneath had disappeared, covered by the voice of the wind, but the sight made up for it all. There was no doubt about what was happening down there – and you knew you had your role to play tonight.  
  
Underneath you saw another group of heroes rushing towards the city center – patiently waiting you let them get closer. An unusual device in your right hand was weighing heavy on your conscience. Would you be able to do it?  
Shigaraki’s words came back to your mind. Was he right? Was there a future even after losing everything? And then you saw a flicker of blue in the distance. An involuntary smile came to your face.

The heroes were closing in, oblivious that they were being watched –

You looked north, where you had seen the blue light, and it welcomed you like the familiar sparkle in turquoise eyes – Yes. Yes, all you had to do was to prove your loyalty, just do this right and there was a new life, one nobody could take from you.   
  


Tightening your grip around the device in your hand you stretched your neck, then with just the slightest audible noise your wings opened and you took off. Your prey had no idea of their death swooping down on them.

Four figures under you - _three seconds_ –  
Two guys and a girl, all running towards the battle in the inner city, one of the guys was red headed, a scrawny young hero, the slowest of them – _two seconds_ -  
The girl was in the middle, she was wearing a pink outfit a brunette ponytail whipping with her each of her movements – _one second –_ wait – _Ochako?_ –

The blast of the explosion tumultuously threw you around in a wave of hot air. Screams from underneath told you that you had not managed to take out the team with the grenade at once as you had been told.  
You didn’t wait to see – instead of waiting until you were right above the three you had let go a few meters behind –

It was not your fault. A mess up, you told yourself. You took your mission bag from the top of the tower you had watched the approaching heroes from and left, without turning once. _If you did not see them, you could not take them out, if you did not see them –_

“Where are they?” “Who attacked us?!” _Those voices could just as well be civilians -_

Something shot past you in the air, brushing past one of your wings. _Fuck_.

Dropping two meters in height you let the next two projectiles pass over your head, before taking a quick swing left, in such a fast motion that you were sure their eyes would hardly keep up – your feet found a building. And with a massive swing of both wings you took up speed, running down the wall, rushing the figures on the ground before they were able to react.

The impact of your incoming body threw over the scrawny redhead, still on the ground you twirled, kicking the feet out under the girl - _not Ochako, thank god -_ and opening your wings and with them throwing back the third opponent, a massive guy wearing a wrestling mask.

Unwilling to waste more time you grabbed the redhead by the hair, pulling a gun from your hip holster with the hand and holding it against his temple.

“I don’t feel like fighting you three on one. So you will step the hell back or he gets the bullet.” You prayed the idiot would not try to play the hero. His two teammates seemed under shock. They probably had not met a villain before who did not get involved in their stupid punching matches. But you had better things to do.   
It was a bit of a bluff, and you hoped they would not take too close a look -  
The two lifted their hands, stepping back just when you felt a movement next to you, the scrawny guy trying to wrestle the gun out of your hands.  
Click.  
You let go of the hand of red hair as he sank to the ground, aiming the weapon up on his big friend, pulling the trigger twice, then the girl, as she was just about to jump into action.   
All three were laying peacefully on the ground, slumbering deeply. Access to a villain weapons lab and a body producing an A-grade knock out drug was a combination that should not be underestimated, though the stun gun, as you called the little tool, would be of little use to anyone else, as it needed to be loaded with fresh feathers.

Plucking the feathers out of your slumbering victims you tied the three up with cable binders, it might not be enough but better than nothing. Then you shook out your tense wings, rolling your shoulders to keep them smooth after the action, ready to continue your mission.

There was something upsetting about leaving the three here - on the one hand they might come to harm, though unlikely so far from the planned route the League planned to take. And on the other hand keeping them alive had been an impulse decision, going against your orders and, even more unnervingly, letting a bunch of heroes escape that might tell of you... Sure, recognition was unlikely, your suit design had been changed, and even your wings now regularly colored dark brown with hair dye, in hopes to hide their distinct coloring. The stun gun was the latest addition, finishing your disguise even when using your secret weapon. Shigaraki had insisted that it was useless and you could simply join them as yourself, but Dabi had understood your reasons. As long as _he_ was out there, you did not feel like being recognized.

“Where are you?! They are getting backup from the east, I thought you were taking care of that?!” Shigaraki’s voice over your earpiece ripped you out of your thoughts.   
“I’ll be there, don’t worry about them.” You answered, taking off again with a loud snap of your wings.

“Hell yeah, join the party, sweety!” that was Toga, a little out of breath but audibly happy.

“Stop polluting the com –“ Dabi’s grouchy voice.

“I take it your target hasn’t showed up then.” You teased him. “Want me to pick you up and we team up a little?” That was an option after all, you were both on duty controlling the influx of enemies with sneak attacks. And you could really use some of his snarky antics right about now, reminding you that this was the right choice. The interaction with the three young heroes had left a sick feeling in your stomach.


End file.
